(Untitled)

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly opens the door to 132 and does her best Vanna White arm waving at the interior.

"And this is my suite. I can't believe you'd never been here before. Weird. Anyway, come on in."

She steps in, smiling over her shoulder at Jayne as he follows her.

"Pretty shiny, huh?"

Comments

[swinging_cod]

Jayne's mouth falls open in undisguised awe.

"You got all this space to your own selves?"

[swinging_cod]

Jayne don't quite know what to think.

It ain't like they had an agreement.

Still.

"I ain't exactly used to sharin'."

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly considers pointing out that whores are kinda shared by definition but decides against it.

"Okay. So. That's a problem, huh?"

[swinging_cod]

He thinks about it for a split second.

"Reckon it is," he replies bewilderedly.

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly was really, really hoping he wasn't going to say that. She sighs.

"It's just- you know I like you, right? Cause I do. A lot."

Her fingers twist together as she searches for the best way to say this.

"But I tried the whole exclusive thing with Alain and it doesn't work. Not for me, not here. This isn't like normal dating. I don't know how long I'm here, I don't know that the door to your world isn't going to close again like it did before, but maybe for years instead of weeks. I don't know how long the pendant lets me stay in your world. I know I could never live there. I kinda can't live, period. It-"

She breaks off, frustrated and more upset than she'll let herself realize.

"It just doesn't work, Jayne."

[swinging_cod]

Jayne looks at her while she's talking, then looks around the suite blankly. He sits on the couch, because it's close to hand.

"Ain't-- ain't askin' for nothin'. Ain't offerin' you nothin' but me. Don't seem like such a hard thing, to say no when you got somebody waitin' on the other side of the door." He shrugs, not looking her in the eye. "Door might bar me tomorrow. Door might bar me never. Ain't no tellin'. Don't mean to hold you. Just wanna have you, is all."

[awesome_lilly]

Oh, so that's how you get Lilly to stop talking.

She's looking at him, trying desperately to think of something to say, and failing utterly. This is not exactly a normal occurrence.

[swinging_cod]

They're both quiet for a moment, then Jayne speaks, low.

"Ain't stupid, you know. See the way your bread is buttered. Saw you had a big hurt, while back. Was here just after, if you don't recollect. Ain't tryin' to press you."

[awesome_lilly]

"I remember," Lilly says quietly, sinking onto the couch beside him. "I remember everything."

Even the stuff she'd rather forget.

"I remember how it started, too. We never meant to get really serious or anything, because, well, Milliways."

It's not a place to plan a long future.

"We just decided not to see other people and things happened, and. Well. Like you said, you were there. You saw how great that worked out. I don't want to-"

She pauses, looks down, her hair swinging forward to hide her face.

"I can't do that again. And this is the only way I know to avoid it."

[swinging_cod]

Jayne stares at her, uncomprehending.

Then, "Well, if that ain't the stupidest thing I ever heard, I don't know what is."

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly's chin jerks up and she turns to face him, indignant.

"Oh, really? Well, if that's so stupid then why don't you tell me your brilliant plan to handle dating when you're dead?"

[swinging_cod]

Tartly, "Don't reckon that'll be an issue for the likes of me, but if it is, I don't see why I'd mess about with a good thing." A pause. "Then again, maybe you don't see it as a good thing. I ain't a mind-reader."

[awesome_lilly]

"Mind-reading boyfriends aren't all they're cracked up to be," Lilly mutters.

"Anyway, you know I think this-" she waves vaguely at the space between them "-is a good thing. I like you. I like being with you. I just don't like the idea that neither of us could ever be with anyone else because of this."

She sinks back into the couch a little.

"Maybe my reasons are stupid. Maybe I'm just bad at monogamy. I definitely sucked at it while I was alive. I thought we'd all be better off if I didn't try for it again."

She glances over at him.

"Apparently I was pretty wrong about that."

[swinging_cod]

He shook his head, nearly scoffing. "Ain't offerin' you no ring. Ain't inclined, and I know you wouldn't take it. But I don't like sharin'. Ain't in my nature. And I don't see that you runnin' around with however many fellas'd make this thing better."

[awesome_lilly]

"It doesn't necessarily make it worse," Lilly points out. "Well, for me. But that's not the problem, so."

She tilts her head.

"I guess... this is kinda a dealbreaker for you, huh?"

[swinging_cod]

'Dealbreaker' isn't a term that's in the vernacular, in Jayne's where and when.

But he's not stupid. He can figure it out by breaking it down.

He stands very still, and forces himself to think.

"Reckon it is. I ain't never been faithful to a woman, because most women've been either a one time go while I was dirtside, or a whore I met along the way. You ain't no one time go. And you ain't no whore."