Comments | aurianfae: (без темы)

aurianfae

(Untitled)

Aug 16, 2004 15:13

I feel... small. Like the creativity has leaked out my ear and I can't find it. I don't want to touch my demo reel with a 10 foot pole, but I know that if I don't I won't ever find a job that will hire me as an artist. Not that I'm so sure that I'll find that anyway. Everyone's gotten interviews. Jeff now has had two job offers from two different ( Read more... )

computers, modeling, art, depression

Comments 4

finemadness August 16 2004, 16:49:39 UTC

model and texture anything. model what you see infront of you. a pen, a stapler, a wood beam, a penis. anything. just model shit. and you are going to get stuck modeling shit you dont want to do. i used to make jokes about me modeling and textureing crates when i get a job.....what have i been doing for a month? modelling and texturing crates. but damn, am i good at it. thinking about what you want to do wastes fucking time. i tortured myself finishing my demo reel. i stopped having my period for 3 months because of stress, became a cronic weed smoker and i lost 10 pounds. but i got it done even though i am most likley insane now.
no point in getting depressed about not having a job. only you can make it better.

aurianfae August 16 2004, 18:33:04 UTC

I know getting depressed about it doesn't help. That also doesn't mean I can turn to myself and go "Hey self... stop being depressed, it's useless" and have it actually work that way. Modeling what I want to is a good idea, I think... I mean, if I'm going to have to model crates or whatever, I might as well model what I want to right this minute and do what other people want me to do later, when I get a job. For now, I want to learn about a variety of objects. Crates will be involved. Pens will be involved. So will wine bottles, etc. To model what I want to model in this next project, a lot of mundane items are going to be involved. So I think in the end it will be a good exercise. But like I've told all the nice people who posted in my journal before... I write in here when I am sad. When I'm happy. When something happens that I feel is noteable to me. If it annoys other people that I'm depressed all the time about the same thing... well, too bad. It makes me feel better to write. I guess that's all.

finemadness August 17 2004, 05:32:39 UTC

i understand that you write in here when you are depressed. but if you are wasteing time thinking about what to do, i was just stateing that you should model anything. i get the feeling that (even tho i have a job) my advise means nothing to you. i stopped replying in your journal for a while because you were blaming everyone else for you not having a job but then you started saying that you relize you must do better so i decided to give some advise again. i know i have prolly only met you once (so i am not some unamed unknown poster) but it silly how you seem to shoot down any advise i give. i decided to critique your stuff cause it seemed you needed help and your responce to me taking time out of my work to help you was not satisfying to me at all. i know what i am talking about but obviously you feel you know more about this industry, how to get a demo reel done when you are depressed, and how to get a job, than i do. i know what its like to be stressed out and depressed about not having a job and being told my stuff is ( ... )

aurianfae August 17 2004, 08:38:31 UTC

I don't know why people keep getting that impression. I DO appreciate the help. It helps to know what it takes to get a job. My own stubborness gets in the way a bit (I'm sure you think it was more than a bit) but usually I get upset that I didn't see what was wrong in the first place, and then make moves to remedy it. I'm sorry you think it was worthless to you to help me. I did appreciate the help. I wish people would stop saying that I obviously do this or that. Thank you for taking the time to try to help me figure out what to do when I'm depressed. I guess it's wierd to me that I finally figured out what to do with myself and then go instruction after all of that. It really wasn't that I was trying to think of something to do... that was a part of it I suppose. It was more that I just didn't have the inspiration to do anything at all. I'm sure everyone has gone through the same thing. I'm sorry you think that I am ungrateful and probably stuck up and the worst person in the world at taking criticism. I'm really not like that. For ( ... )