Translated from the Spanish.

[ashcanprobably]

I'm sitting at my desk, writing a story about a dog. Several dogs, in fact, their histories and their misadventures

Comments

[sexismorbid]

I feel bad reading this because I treat my mother just as bad, if not worse. Some day when we are parents being abused by our ungrateful children we will look back on this and shed tears of regret. Also, I really want some chocolate cake with wine in it now. GOD DAMN.

[ashcanprobably]

What? I can't believe this. How my mother managed to curry any favor with internet strangers in a post I clearly wrote with designs to glorify YOURS TRULY is beyond me! Here I thought I manipulated the details well enough so as to assure that I was, in fact, the one being victimized. Think it, a poor, naturalist writer is being force-fed alcoholic pastries, and for what, the fancies of a batty old lady with enhanced superhuman senses?? Horrid!

I think I'll avoid having ungrateful kids by making sure I deny them all the things that they would be grateful for, that way, their behaviour will be justified, at the very least, and woe is them for acting up, cause my tears of regret are almost always followed by my FISTS OF FURY.

Moms and I kid around like this all the time.

[your_odalisque]

". . . a poor, naturalist writer is being force-fed alcoholic pastries, and for what, the fancies of a batty old lady with enhanced superhuman senses??"

*laughs hysterically*

[_toffee]

heehee. are you really allergic to chocolate? i'm not a big fan myself. i don't like chocolate cake (there are exceptions) and chocolate ice cream.

i think dogs die if they eat chocolate.

[your_odalisque]

My dog ate a whole bag of M&M's (2 lbs). He ran around the house as though on crack for 45 minutes, and then fell asleep... but didn't die. They have to eat a fairly large amount of it to croak, and it has to be pure cocoa ("not milk chocolate as in M&M's," explained the vet when I frantically dialed him).

[ashcanprobably]

Me and your dog are like exactly the same way! The cocoa bean and I have always had a funny relationship for as long as I can remember. Chocolate doesn't make me sleepy so much as gives me an incredible case of THE SHITS. I'm lactose intolerant, too, and my allergy pretty much behaves the same way; it gives my stomach a wringing churn of an ill-feeling. But! I can easily get rid of the choco-malaise by smoking inordinate amounts of REEFER. Unfortunately, chocolate is at its most attractive to me when I'm stoned out of my mind, hence a vicious cycle!

Well, I'm certainly glad that SOMEBODY understood the purpose of this entry.

[your_odalisque]

speaking of which... *coughs* i'm in a kind frame of mind (no chocolate to be found, though).

[mlknchz]

Your poor, poor mother deserves better from you..she bore you into this world after hours of horribly painful labor, and THIS is the thanks she gets?

[cosime]

Word has it that your journal is a fag hangout. So, being enlightened as to the pleasures of boy-love myself, I will lurk here periodically if only to savour the delights of your olde-worlde layout and fine writing.

A qualification: Your ma seems nice. And I actually quite like chocolate cake.

[ashcanprobably]

It's more of a hideaway than a hangout.

[mlknchz]

I always wanted to open a gay bar called "The Three Meter Board" as it would be a low dive.

[ashcanprobably]

Me and viciouspeter are thinking about becoming partners and opening a lounge called "Shack of Sit."