part 296 piles of hay

[aphanon_meme]

Meme, I expect all this hay to be spun into gold by tomorrow morning! Or I'll chop your head off. ... maybe. I'm loving the new show Once Upon a Time, and man, do I love Rumpelstiltskin. It's always been one of my favorite fairy tales - a miller's daughter in distress, a king that knows how to court a woman, and I mean, why does Rumpelstiltskin

Comments

[si_espana]

...

Holanda?

[dam_stijl]

[freezes]

[just fucking freezes]

[dick out and everything]

[#awkward]

He's not excited whatreyoutalkingaboutit'sjustanicon!

[si_espana]

[Stares. Shocked]

[L-laughs awkwardly and turns away] I'm sorry! I shouldn't stare, but really! Why are you doing that out here?! Do you need something to cover up? What's gotten into you? Did something happen that you have to do it here now?

Or do you like doing that in public? Not that I'm judging or anything, because I guess it can be exciting, yeah, but... Oh, you just do what you like! Just don't do it where the little children can see, all right? [Too late. And here is Spain rambling courtesy of awkward]

Do you have lube? It'd feel better if you do.

DEM KEYWORDS 1/2

[dam_stijl]

[opens his mouth to answer but goddamn spain do you ever shut up]

[keeps trying to get a word in]

[and keeps trying]

[and - ]

2/2

[dam_stijl]

I DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT LUBE, MORON.

[si_espana]

Well okay, that's also your choice! You don't need to yell.

[dam_stijl]

Y'wouldn't be quiet!

[also it's spain. it happens]

[si_espana]

You have your penis out in public! [And he saw!]

[dam_stijl]

It was a dare!

[and he's still got it out!]

[si_espana]

Oh.

It's a very scandalous dare, though!

[Which is why he still has his back turned]

[dam_stijl]

[sighs and settles back in his seat, looking away and resuming]

They are, sometimes.

[si_espana]

And you actually have to finish off and everything?

[Weirdest conversation ever. Not that Spain notices, of course]

[dam_stijl]

[....]

No. I don't.

[...that wasn't the deal]

[stops and starts buttoning up again]

[si_espana]

'Must be awkward though if you just stop.

[Starts patting and digging into his pockets. Does he have any tissue? Hand sanitizer? Hmm... Massage oil, candy...]

[dam_stijl]

[huffs loud enough for anyone to hear and crosses his legs, reaching into his pockets so he can smoke instead]

It's fine.

[si_espana]

Hm? [Hears that and looks over his shoulder at him] You're done?