Concessions...

[_chimene_]

So, I've come to the conclusion that pro 'peace and love' folk, who although might not ALL put much thought into what that means for them, are at least pro peace and love. If more people at least advocated pro peace and lovery, the world would be a Considerably different place [though not completely, because advocating obviously doesn't mean

Comments

[meaniepoo]

It is very unlike you! So you're saying that someone made you feel bad but they didn't mean it so you'll just try to ignore it and live with it?

As a guy who is *really* good at unintentionally saying inappropriate / hurtful stuff I'd like to be told when I do that. I'm remarkably bad at empathizing, but I don't think it's ok for you to live with my stupidity because I didn't mean it.

And I'm not putting the burden on the "victim", people should do their best to understand others but when that fails you should help them.

The notion of "the man" is a one size fits all restrictive model. I'm not sure if society evolved that one or if we're intrinsically predisposed to follow that model, and if women are predisposed to like it (because "the man" is the strong alpha male who will produce awesome offsprings and will protect his mate).

If it's a thing from society then I don't know what a better model would be, I don't like the effeminated metrosexual man either. "The geek" I like, but I'm biased ;-)

Anyways, don't put up with it.

[_chimene_]

lol JF. I think you misunderstood my concession. The response I was referring to that had to be dealt with was my EMOTIONAL response, which was impeding my understanding of the cause for these comments. Actually, the entire purpose of understanding them better IS to know how to respond to them in a more adequate way.

I don't think anyone is predisposed to follow a model. Many men do NOT like the idea of being some alphamale, and Many women do NOT like it either. Ultimately, what I'm saying is that each person should create their own model, and live in a way that is right for them, that does not harm, or restrict other people. If people had non-restricting and open minded views about life, and their image, others wouldn't feel the need to fit into ANY social model, to feel more accepted

[meaniepoo]

Ha, I did misunderstand and though you'd changed a lot (in the wrong way). I completely agree with what you said, then (about putting a low-pass filter on your emotions to better understand and react).

I'm not sure that alpha-maleness wasn't built into humans through evolutionary pressures over a long time or if it's a "nearer" social thing. I'm not even sure I can legitimately separate evolution and social pressure. My ideas aren't well-formed here, I'll have to ponder that some more.

One thing that's certain is that the position of men and women has recently started changing a lot, I think because it's easier both socially and towards nature in general to not be an alpha-male, therefore other worthwhile alternative "models" pop up and survive.

I smiled while reading your last paragraph :-)
I do change, I have been recently, and it's because of the people I interact with and the way they challenge me and force me to re-evaluate. I guess I never thanked you for it, but you did change me (and hopefully still will), so thanks!

[_chimene_]

I'm glad to hear it. I smiled while reading your last paragraph, as well. You're words inspire me. I'm glad the inverse is true, as well.