mariquix89
in
__vam
One-shot
Tilte: Smoke filled longing
Rating: PG-13
Summary: For a few precious second I could actually forget, forget that you ever existed
For a few precious second I could actually forget, forget that you ever existed, forget your never-ending silliness, forget your smile and your eyes; for a moment I forget that you aren´t here with me. The smoke form the fag I´m holding took away your words and left in its way, instead, a trail of burning feelings in my throat.
And as I take another drag and feel my lungs be filled with this poisonous air, I become lightheaded and I´m free from the sensations your hands imprinted on me; and I swear that I don´t feel how you whisper quiet I love you´s to my neck, and I swear that there´s absolutely nothing that reminds me of you, not even the boys skating outside. And the bed we used to share, I promise I didn’t threw it out because it brought back memories of sweet love making in the night or raw needy sex in the afternoon, no, I threw it out because it broke.
The memories of you and I are slowly being burned away by the ashes, by the world famous ashes you so wanted to document. And my dreams are not of blue eyed angels with curly brown hair; and I don´t repeat to myself every word of love you said to me. And I never look at the photo album that´s hidden in a corner of my closet, just to see the exact same color of your eyes, and I swear I don’t get depressed when someone says your name
I light another cigarette, letting the smoke curl around my head and I don´t see in the gray air, limbs tangled together in red sheets. And every time I see old re-runs of Viva la Bam or Jackass I don’t break down and cry; and the reality that you´re never coming back never comes at random times.
With the fag still on my lips, I head out the apartment and put two more packs inside the pocket of jeans, the same jeans you used to love, because according to you they fit like a second skin to my perfectly molded ass. I walk for a while until I come across your grave. I don’t feel the need to yell at the tombstone that´s in front of me that you lied, that you promised me forever and forever only lasted until you were stupid enough to perform that fucking stunt.
And I don’t feel as if my world is crumbling down at my feet every time I look at your name engraved on the stone. And I don´t feel ecstatic because the doctor said that the cancer stick is working its magic on me and I don’t expect to join you, wherever it is that you ended up in and tell you how much I missed you and I love you, and take you in my arms and make love to you slowly and thoroughly to make up for lost time.
I know it´s short but be kind and comment!
Rating: PG-13
Summary: For a few precious second I could actually forget, forget that you ever existed
For a few precious second I could actually forget, forget that you ever existed, forget your never-ending silliness, forget your smile and your eyes; for a moment I forget that you aren´t here with me. The smoke form the fag I´m holding took away your words and left in its way, instead, a trail of burning feelings in my throat.
And as I take another drag and feel my lungs be filled with this poisonous air, I become lightheaded and I´m free from the sensations your hands imprinted on me; and I swear that I don´t feel how you whisper quiet I love you´s to my neck, and I swear that there´s absolutely nothing that reminds me of you, not even the boys skating outside. And the bed we used to share, I promise I didn’t threw it out because it brought back memories of sweet love making in the night or raw needy sex in the afternoon, no, I threw it out because it broke.
The memories of you and I are slowly being burned away by the ashes, by the world famous ashes you so wanted to document. And my dreams are not of blue eyed angels with curly brown hair; and I don´t repeat to myself every word of love you said to me. And I never look at the photo album that´s hidden in a corner of my closet, just to see the exact same color of your eyes, and I swear I don’t get depressed when someone says your name
I light another cigarette, letting the smoke curl around my head and I don´t see in the gray air, limbs tangled together in red sheets. And every time I see old re-runs of Viva la Bam or Jackass I don’t break down and cry; and the reality that you´re never coming back never comes at random times.
With the fag still on my lips, I head out the apartment and put two more packs inside the pocket of jeans, the same jeans you used to love, because according to you they fit like a second skin to my perfectly molded ass. I walk for a while until I come across your grave. I don’t feel the need to yell at the tombstone that´s in front of me that you lied, that you promised me forever and forever only lasted until you were stupid enough to perform that fucking stunt.
And I don’t feel as if my world is crumbling down at my feet every time I look at your name engraved on the stone. And I don´t feel ecstatic because the doctor said that the cancer stick is working its magic on me and I don’t expect to join you, wherever it is that you ended up in and tell you how much I missed you and I love you, and take you in my arms and make love to you slowly and thoroughly to make up for lost time.
I know it´s short but be kind and comment!