Theres Something About Ville
Now im sure when you clicked on this story you might have thought about the movie 'Theres Something About Mary' Well this story is based on that. :D Me and a friend (stupid_MF335) have been writting VAM for some time now and we wanted to post this because it is just sooo darn funny. For those who haven't seen the movie i suggest you watch it before reading this so it can make more sense. Here is the first chapter and we hope to make more soon. enjoy.
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“… There was this one boy in high school, his name was Ville. I just can’t stop thinkin’ about him…”
“Ok, Bam. Let’s start from the beginning. Where did you meet Ville?”
*@#$% FLASHBACK %$#@*
I was seventeen, and I was in love. All I had to do was ask her to the prom, no biggie. I approached her quietly from behind and said a simple ‘Hi’, to break the ice.
“What do you want, Bam?” Jenn said she took a drag from her smoke.
“I was just wondering if you wanted to go to the prom with me, its okay if you don’t, but I’m just asking.”
“Ok, Bam so this is what’s happening right now. I heard some rumors that the hottest boy in school was going to ask ME; Jenn Rivell, to prom.”
“…So I’ll pick you up at 6…ok?”
“Can’t you hear right? I said that if things don’t go according to plan…then maybe I’ll go with you.”
“Ok, I’ll remember that.” I walked away with a hint of disappointment. I heard some snickering and saw that my friends were right across from me. Foiled again. Maybe they could cheer me up.
“Hey Bam! I saw that little fiasco back there. Burn.” Ryan said with laughter in his eyes.
“Ah fuck you man, she just doesn’t know what she’s missing.” I retorted, almost fully over Jen…that bitch.
“OWWW!” Rake was making cat calls to girls passing by but the one he was eyeing was not a girl. He was the most gorgeous boy in all of the school. He would never go for a guy like me.
Over in the distance was Ville’s mentally retarded brother. Gas. Gas was looking for his baseball that he lost. Rake thought he was cool and flagged him in so he could pester him like he loved to do.
“Hey! Gas! Come here my boy. So you want to find that baseball of yours eh?”
“You found my ball?!” A very excited Gas said jumping up and down.
“Nooo, but that guy over there…you see that guy? He has it, but he has another word instead of ball…”
Gas ran over to where this jock was making out with his girlfriend and tapped him on the shoulder. “ha- ha- have you seen my wiener?”
Right then the jock got defensive of his girlfriend and started pushing poor Gas around. I got defensive myself and jumped in to help Gas out.
“HEY! What the fuck do you think your doing?!” I turned around to see that Ville was jumping into the fight as well, pushing the jock off of Gas. “This is my brother you heartless prick!”
The jock backed off and walked away with his girl under him arm.
“Hey, thanks Bam. That was very kind of you to stand up for Gas back there.” …He knows my name?
“Uh…you’re welcome Ville.”
“Hey, I have to walk Gas back over to the house would you like to tag along?”
“…Sure!...”
As surprised as I was I couldn’t pass up a chance to walk with Ville. This was too good to be true.
“So Bam, what kind of music do you like? I’m a sucker for Neil Young.” Ville stared into my eyes looking for some sort of resemblance.
“Wha- …I’m a Neil fan all the way!” I smiled at Ville with my mouth full of metal. I hated having braces just for the fact that they made me SO unattractive.
“Bam! Piggy back ride!” Gas squealed with joy.
“Oh, um, I don’t know if he can lift me…”
“Bam, he’s two hundred and sixty pounds, he can lift you.” Ville laughed slightly as he spoke.
“If you insist…” I hesitantly jumped on gas’s back and he could indeed lift me. He ran around for a few seconds before putting me down and squealing ‘My turn!’ He didn’t give me much a’ chance to respond before he flew a’ top my back and screamed into my ear ‘FASTER FASTER!’ Boy. I had to give that lad a piggy back ride al the way to Ville’s house. When he jumped off all I heard was a crack.
“Once again, thank you so much for what you did back there for Gas.”
“Oh, it was nothing…really. Well. I guess I’ll see you around eh?” I turned to walk away when Ville grabbed my shoulder and started talking fast.
“Bam? Would you like to go with me to the prom?”
“Ohhh, you mean with your friends because I do always love to meet new peop- “
“No. I mean you and me…going together”
“…Absolutely! Of course that’s what you meant.” God my heart was racing a mile an hour. Did Ville just ask me, the dorky brace face who has never been laid…ever?
Turning around Ville waved and shouted a ‘come and get me at 5, ok?’ I nodded and walked to my house; boy, I couldn’t wait till prom.
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“… There was this one boy in high school, his name was Ville. I just can’t stop thinkin’ about him…”
“Ok, Bam. Let’s start from the beginning. Where did you meet Ville?”
*@#$% FLASHBACK %$#@*
I was seventeen, and I was in love. All I had to do was ask her to the prom, no biggie. I approached her quietly from behind and said a simple ‘Hi’, to break the ice.
“What do you want, Bam?” Jenn said she took a drag from her smoke.
“I was just wondering if you wanted to go to the prom with me, its okay if you don’t, but I’m just asking.”
“Ok, Bam so this is what’s happening right now. I heard some rumors that the hottest boy in school was going to ask ME; Jenn Rivell, to prom.”
“…So I’ll pick you up at 6…ok?”
“Can’t you hear right? I said that if things don’t go according to plan…then maybe I’ll go with you.”
“Ok, I’ll remember that.” I walked away with a hint of disappointment. I heard some snickering and saw that my friends were right across from me. Foiled again. Maybe they could cheer me up.
“Hey Bam! I saw that little fiasco back there. Burn.” Ryan said with laughter in his eyes.
“Ah fuck you man, she just doesn’t know what she’s missing.” I retorted, almost fully over Jen…that bitch.
“OWWW!” Rake was making cat calls to girls passing by but the one he was eyeing was not a girl. He was the most gorgeous boy in all of the school. He would never go for a guy like me.
Over in the distance was Ville’s mentally retarded brother. Gas. Gas was looking for his baseball that he lost. Rake thought he was cool and flagged him in so he could pester him like he loved to do.
“Hey! Gas! Come here my boy. So you want to find that baseball of yours eh?”
“You found my ball?!” A very excited Gas said jumping up and down.
“Nooo, but that guy over there…you see that guy? He has it, but he has another word instead of ball…”
Gas ran over to where this jock was making out with his girlfriend and tapped him on the shoulder. “ha- ha- have you seen my wiener?”
Right then the jock got defensive of his girlfriend and started pushing poor Gas around. I got defensive myself and jumped in to help Gas out.
“HEY! What the fuck do you think your doing?!” I turned around to see that Ville was jumping into the fight as well, pushing the jock off of Gas. “This is my brother you heartless prick!”
The jock backed off and walked away with his girl under him arm.
“Hey, thanks Bam. That was very kind of you to stand up for Gas back there.” …He knows my name?
“Uh…you’re welcome Ville.”
“Hey, I have to walk Gas back over to the house would you like to tag along?”
“…Sure!...”
As surprised as I was I couldn’t pass up a chance to walk with Ville. This was too good to be true.
“So Bam, what kind of music do you like? I’m a sucker for Neil Young.” Ville stared into my eyes looking for some sort of resemblance.
“Wha- …I’m a Neil fan all the way!” I smiled at Ville with my mouth full of metal. I hated having braces just for the fact that they made me SO unattractive.
“Bam! Piggy back ride!” Gas squealed with joy.
“Oh, um, I don’t know if he can lift me…”
“Bam, he’s two hundred and sixty pounds, he can lift you.” Ville laughed slightly as he spoke.
“If you insist…” I hesitantly jumped on gas’s back and he could indeed lift me. He ran around for a few seconds before putting me down and squealing ‘My turn!’ He didn’t give me much a’ chance to respond before he flew a’ top my back and screamed into my ear ‘FASTER FASTER!’ Boy. I had to give that lad a piggy back ride al the way to Ville’s house. When he jumped off all I heard was a crack.
“Once again, thank you so much for what you did back there for Gas.”
“Oh, it was nothing…really. Well. I guess I’ll see you around eh?” I turned to walk away when Ville grabbed my shoulder and started talking fast.
“Bam? Would you like to go with me to the prom?”
“Ohhh, you mean with your friends because I do always love to meet new peop- “
“No. I mean you and me…going together”
“…Absolutely! Of course that’s what you meant.” God my heart was racing a mile an hour. Did Ville just ask me, the dorky brace face who has never been laid…ever?
Turning around Ville waved and shouted a ‘come and get me at 5, ok?’ I nodded and walked to my house; boy, I couldn’t wait till prom.