(no subject)
Title: Sweet Dreams
Author: lostxgeneration
Rating: PG (fluff!)
Summary: Everyone has their secrets, every person a story to tell. Some are better known while others are barely breathed out loud. Mine happens to be the second of the two, mine is a tale never told. At least, not in words.
WAIT! Read this first if you want any explanation as to why I've seemingly abandoned Carousel and randomly popped up with a standalone...
I have come to find that my computer has shown an increased amount of homophobia... my gay guy friend uses it -crash-, I try to log onto LJ -is fine- I try to read slash -crash-. Why? Who knows but I think I got the bugs fixed (obviously because I'm posting) but I just wanted you all to know that Carousel has not died... just my computer. I will try to update between band practices and school so... gimme another couple days?
So, here's a peace offering of general angst-ay fluff...
The song lyrics belong to this awesome new band called Bullets and Octane.
If you like them I urge you to please, please, please check them out, there's a link to them in my livejournal (all of them).
You won't be sorry.
Thanks for putting up with my long rant of a note... now on with the slash!
Sweet Dreams
Look in my eyes
They tell a little story
I could never tell
Everyone has their secrets, every person a story to tell. Some are better known while others are barely breathed out loud. Mine happens to be the second of the two, mine is a tale never told. At least, not in words.
I don’t know when it started, I really never was good at keeping track of dates and things like that. I just know that it progressed over time, this feeling towards you. Of course, I’d always known I liked you. Since the moment I saw you it was lust at first sight. Your coffee curls that fall around those sapphire eyes always lit up with a smile… How could any one not want to be yours?
Our first encounter was far from perfect. It was clichéd and over done. You were the blushing fan and I was the tired rock star, just coming off stage after a particularly good show. I remember the smile that pulled at your lips when I asked you if I could buy you a drink in exchange for a tour ‘round the Philly scene. It was a smile so innocent, so happy, so admiring that I was almost unsure of it’s sincerity… but one look into those eager crystalline eyes and I knew that it was real.
You were different from everything I’d heard about you. I’d be lying if I said the media didn’t build you up to be an arrogant asshole who doesn’t give a fuck about anything but himself. You played the perfect gentleman, opening doors and insisting on buying the drinks as we raced through the city’s night life in your shiny new Lamborghini.
But that was years ago and since then we’ve gone from casual drinking buddies to best friends, brothers if you will. And since then it’d be wrong to say that you house has become anything other than a second home to me. You’ve become my escape, love, and I’m not quite sure if that’s a good thing or not.
You see, now whenever I get in trouble or it all becomes too much I simply book a ticket and jump on the next Redeye flight to Pennsylvania. And I find it sort of amazing that no matter what time of day or night I show up at your door, it’s always okay. It’s more than okay, and it’s this fact I’m realizing now as the yellow taxi cab pulls up your long driveway.
It’s still early in the morning I know you’ll be asleep, buried under the covers with thick velvet curtains blocking out all threatening sun. But your parents are awake at least, they’ll let me in… just like they always do.
I knock at the door, nothing in hand but my beat up acoustic, and wait patiently for someone to answer. April blinks tiredly up at me and smiles as she pulls me into a motherly hug.
“Ville, dear… how do you always manage to show up at just the right times?” I let my brow furrow slightly in silent question as she releases me from her arms. I didn’t come here for you, it was more my own escape. She shakes her head a little sadly.
“He never can hold onto them… he pushes them away and then wonders why they leave… why they always leave.” She seems to look past me a little and I wonder if she’s still addressing me. She seems to snap back to herself rather quickly, shaking whatever had a hold of her off.
“Listen to me, I sound like a crazy person. Why don’t you go upstairs and tell him you’re here? He’ll still be asleep but it’ll do him some good to know. I’ll make you boys some breakfast.” I nod, setting down my guitar in the hall before turning towards your room, mission now gone from getting piss drunk and forgetting everything to comforting you… though I don’t want to let myself believe what April hinted at, it would just give me too much hope.
I press a palm to your door and push it open slowly. You’re just as I thought, covers pulled up to your chin as you sleep with your limbs tangled up in a ball. I frown slightly as I make my way to kneel by your side. You don’t sleep like this, every other time I’ve seen you asleep you’ve been spread out across the whole bed… never curled up into yourself.
It’s not until I fix my jade gaze to your face that I notice the tears that silently run down your cheek. You sniff quietly now and again and I wonder if you’re really asleep or not.
“Bam?” I call your name, wincing slightly at how hoarse my voice sounds. Bright cobalts snap open at the sound, leaving our eyes to meet, yours etched in disbelief and mine the definition of concern. You sit up suddenly, letting the blankets fall to rest over the lower half of your shirtless torso as you try in vain to make the tears stop.
“Vil’, what are you… I didn’t… how did you know?” I smile slightly as I start to stand.
“In all honesty, love?” I kick off my shoes and motion to the empty space next to you on the bed. “Can I…?”
“Oh ah, yeah of course.” You push over a little and pull the blankets up for me to crawl under.
“In all honesty, I didn’t know… not until your mother told me when she opened the door.” You cast your eyes down to your hands and go quiet for a moment.
“She told you?” You voice is so small and fragile. I take the smile out of mine and rephrase a little.
“Well, no not so much as she hinted at it… she asked me how I always managed to show up at the right times, that right there told me something.” Your eyes flick up to mine before returning to your hands. I hook a long finger under your chin, forcing your faze to meet me.
“Why don’t you tell me what happened?” Your breathing hitches a little and I’m not sure why. You swallow harshly and let your eyes slip shut.
“What’s there to say? She left me.” A tear slips from behind your closed eyes and I catch it.
“Oh Bam, I’m s-“ Before I can finish there’s a hand over my lips and something dangerous sparkling in your glassy ceruleans.
“Don’t be sorry for me Ville, don’t you dare.” I pull your hand from my mouth but I don’t let it go.
“I wasn’t going to say I was sorry for you. I’m sorry for her. I’m sorry she was too bloody stupid to see what she had.” Your lips twitch into a small smile.
“I’m sorry, I just… don’t like pity.” I let your hand slip from mine, choosing instead to wrap an arm around you shoulders.
“I know, Bammi, I know…” You sink down into my chest and I’m slightly surprised at the lack of discomfort between us. Your eyes slip shut again as you curl up to my side.
“When was the last time you got some real sleep, love?” I watch your eyes press shut a little tighter in concentration.
“Mm, I dunno… couple days?” I can’t resist the urge to tangle my long fingers in those chocolate curls any longer. Your breath slows and evens as I wind my fingers in and out of your locks.
“Well, that won’t do now will it? How about you close your eyes and sleep for a while, okay?” You lift half-open eyes to meet mine.
“Will you be here when I wake up?”
“Of course, Bam.” You smile and snuggle back into me.
“I like you better than them, Ville.” I let a small grin pull at my lips and my heart speeds up just a little bit.
“Why’s that, Bammi?” You’re quiet a moment and I’ve almost think you’ve fallen asleep until…
“They’re never there when I wake up.” I wrap my arms just a little bit tighter around your shoulders.
“Ssh, no more of that now. Go to sleep love, I won’t leave.” You let a yawn pass your lips.
“I believe you… g’night Willa.”
I watch as you fall further into sleep’s grasp, letting it smooth out the worry lines that had formed across your forehead. And it’s in this moment that I realize I can’t keep you safe from anything but… but I know I’d fight to the death for you. I just wish you’d look in my eyes and see what I want to say, what I can never say.
I want to tell you I love you, I want to tell you I’ve always loved you but… all I can manage is a quiet ‘Good night, love’ as you drift away into the only world where everything can be okay.
Well she, she don't know
what I could never mention
The things I do when she's sleeping soundly
Well she, she don't know
Ain't gonna fuck with you.
Sweet little dreams my darling,
Sweet little dreams tonight.
Look in my eyes
I got no fucking answers
Sweet little dreams, my darling
Sweet little dreams tonight
All tucked away
It seems I'm never sleeping
Sweet little dreams my darling
Sweet little dreams tonight...
I can't keep you safe from anything but...
-----------------------------
comments?
Oh! and I forgot to mention... it's been a while so this is my new writing journal for vam fics and just general band schtuff... I used to be lostxgeneration (still am but... no longer posting here as such) so... I have no friends yet, anyone want to add me? Please? :P
Author: lostxgeneration
Rating: PG (fluff!)
Summary: Everyone has their secrets, every person a story to tell. Some are better known while others are barely breathed out loud. Mine happens to be the second of the two, mine is a tale never told. At least, not in words.
WAIT! Read this first if you want any explanation as to why I've seemingly abandoned Carousel and randomly popped up with a standalone...
I have come to find that my computer has shown an increased amount of homophobia... my gay guy friend uses it -crash-, I try to log onto LJ -is fine- I try to read slash -crash-. Why? Who knows but I think I got the bugs fixed (obviously because I'm posting) but I just wanted you all to know that Carousel has not died... just my computer. I will try to update between band practices and school so... gimme another couple days?
So, here's a peace offering of general angst-ay fluff...
The song lyrics belong to this awesome new band called Bullets and Octane.
If you like them I urge you to please, please, please check them out, there's a link to them in my livejournal (all of them).
You won't be sorry.
Thanks for putting up with my long rant of a note... now on with the slash!
Sweet Dreams
Look in my eyes
They tell a little story
I could never tell
Everyone has their secrets, every person a story to tell. Some are better known while others are barely breathed out loud. Mine happens to be the second of the two, mine is a tale never told. At least, not in words.
I don’t know when it started, I really never was good at keeping track of dates and things like that. I just know that it progressed over time, this feeling towards you. Of course, I’d always known I liked you. Since the moment I saw you it was lust at first sight. Your coffee curls that fall around those sapphire eyes always lit up with a smile… How could any one not want to be yours?
Our first encounter was far from perfect. It was clichéd and over done. You were the blushing fan and I was the tired rock star, just coming off stage after a particularly good show. I remember the smile that pulled at your lips when I asked you if I could buy you a drink in exchange for a tour ‘round the Philly scene. It was a smile so innocent, so happy, so admiring that I was almost unsure of it’s sincerity… but one look into those eager crystalline eyes and I knew that it was real.
You were different from everything I’d heard about you. I’d be lying if I said the media didn’t build you up to be an arrogant asshole who doesn’t give a fuck about anything but himself. You played the perfect gentleman, opening doors and insisting on buying the drinks as we raced through the city’s night life in your shiny new Lamborghini.
But that was years ago and since then we’ve gone from casual drinking buddies to best friends, brothers if you will. And since then it’d be wrong to say that you house has become anything other than a second home to me. You’ve become my escape, love, and I’m not quite sure if that’s a good thing or not.
You see, now whenever I get in trouble or it all becomes too much I simply book a ticket and jump on the next Redeye flight to Pennsylvania. And I find it sort of amazing that no matter what time of day or night I show up at your door, it’s always okay. It’s more than okay, and it’s this fact I’m realizing now as the yellow taxi cab pulls up your long driveway.
It’s still early in the morning I know you’ll be asleep, buried under the covers with thick velvet curtains blocking out all threatening sun. But your parents are awake at least, they’ll let me in… just like they always do.
I knock at the door, nothing in hand but my beat up acoustic, and wait patiently for someone to answer. April blinks tiredly up at me and smiles as she pulls me into a motherly hug.
“Ville, dear… how do you always manage to show up at just the right times?” I let my brow furrow slightly in silent question as she releases me from her arms. I didn’t come here for you, it was more my own escape. She shakes her head a little sadly.
“He never can hold onto them… he pushes them away and then wonders why they leave… why they always leave.” She seems to look past me a little and I wonder if she’s still addressing me. She seems to snap back to herself rather quickly, shaking whatever had a hold of her off.
“Listen to me, I sound like a crazy person. Why don’t you go upstairs and tell him you’re here? He’ll still be asleep but it’ll do him some good to know. I’ll make you boys some breakfast.” I nod, setting down my guitar in the hall before turning towards your room, mission now gone from getting piss drunk and forgetting everything to comforting you… though I don’t want to let myself believe what April hinted at, it would just give me too much hope.
I press a palm to your door and push it open slowly. You’re just as I thought, covers pulled up to your chin as you sleep with your limbs tangled up in a ball. I frown slightly as I make my way to kneel by your side. You don’t sleep like this, every other time I’ve seen you asleep you’ve been spread out across the whole bed… never curled up into yourself.
It’s not until I fix my jade gaze to your face that I notice the tears that silently run down your cheek. You sniff quietly now and again and I wonder if you’re really asleep or not.
“Bam?” I call your name, wincing slightly at how hoarse my voice sounds. Bright cobalts snap open at the sound, leaving our eyes to meet, yours etched in disbelief and mine the definition of concern. You sit up suddenly, letting the blankets fall to rest over the lower half of your shirtless torso as you try in vain to make the tears stop.
“Vil’, what are you… I didn’t… how did you know?” I smile slightly as I start to stand.
“In all honesty, love?” I kick off my shoes and motion to the empty space next to you on the bed. “Can I…?”
“Oh ah, yeah of course.” You push over a little and pull the blankets up for me to crawl under.
“In all honesty, I didn’t know… not until your mother told me when she opened the door.” You cast your eyes down to your hands and go quiet for a moment.
“She told you?” You voice is so small and fragile. I take the smile out of mine and rephrase a little.
“Well, no not so much as she hinted at it… she asked me how I always managed to show up at the right times, that right there told me something.” Your eyes flick up to mine before returning to your hands. I hook a long finger under your chin, forcing your faze to meet me.
“Why don’t you tell me what happened?” Your breathing hitches a little and I’m not sure why. You swallow harshly and let your eyes slip shut.
“What’s there to say? She left me.” A tear slips from behind your closed eyes and I catch it.
“Oh Bam, I’m s-“ Before I can finish there’s a hand over my lips and something dangerous sparkling in your glassy ceruleans.
“Don’t be sorry for me Ville, don’t you dare.” I pull your hand from my mouth but I don’t let it go.
“I wasn’t going to say I was sorry for you. I’m sorry for her. I’m sorry she was too bloody stupid to see what she had.” Your lips twitch into a small smile.
“I’m sorry, I just… don’t like pity.” I let your hand slip from mine, choosing instead to wrap an arm around you shoulders.
“I know, Bammi, I know…” You sink down into my chest and I’m slightly surprised at the lack of discomfort between us. Your eyes slip shut again as you curl up to my side.
“When was the last time you got some real sleep, love?” I watch your eyes press shut a little tighter in concentration.
“Mm, I dunno… couple days?” I can’t resist the urge to tangle my long fingers in those chocolate curls any longer. Your breath slows and evens as I wind my fingers in and out of your locks.
“Well, that won’t do now will it? How about you close your eyes and sleep for a while, okay?” You lift half-open eyes to meet mine.
“Will you be here when I wake up?”
“Of course, Bam.” You smile and snuggle back into me.
“I like you better than them, Ville.” I let a small grin pull at my lips and my heart speeds up just a little bit.
“Why’s that, Bammi?” You’re quiet a moment and I’ve almost think you’ve fallen asleep until…
“They’re never there when I wake up.” I wrap my arms just a little bit tighter around your shoulders.
“Ssh, no more of that now. Go to sleep love, I won’t leave.” You let a yawn pass your lips.
“I believe you… g’night Willa.”
I watch as you fall further into sleep’s grasp, letting it smooth out the worry lines that had formed across your forehead. And it’s in this moment that I realize I can’t keep you safe from anything but… but I know I’d fight to the death for you. I just wish you’d look in my eyes and see what I want to say, what I can never say.
I want to tell you I love you, I want to tell you I’ve always loved you but… all I can manage is a quiet ‘Good night, love’ as you drift away into the only world where everything can be okay.
Well she, she don't know
what I could never mention
The things I do when she's sleeping soundly
Well she, she don't know
Ain't gonna fuck with you.
Sweet little dreams my darling,
Sweet little dreams tonight.
Look in my eyes
I got no fucking answers
Sweet little dreams, my darling
Sweet little dreams tonight
All tucked away
It seems I'm never sleeping
Sweet little dreams my darling
Sweet little dreams tonight...
I can't keep you safe from anything but...
-----------------------------
comments?
Oh! and I forgot to mention... it's been a while so this is my new writing journal for vam fics and just general band schtuff... I used to be lostxgeneration (still am but... no longer posting here as such) so... I have no friends yet, anyone want to add me? Please? :P