it's like this and like that and like this and uh
So, here I am at work. It's my next to last next to last day.
They are going to pay me on Friday, which is MUCHO MUCHO good and appreciated. They are also going to throw me a little lunch party. I think there will be champagne. Some things are so fitting. I can't decide though. Celebrating I'm leaving? Being genuinely nice? Doing what they think they're supposed to. I hear my aunt's voice in my head saying, "Does it matter?"
Guys I just don't know. It's like spinning and looking for answers, and being completely unsure which way is up. but it's good and strange.
I saw three movies this weekend. It was craziness. But it got me to thinking. A lot. One, I always see movies with people. It's not that I'm afraid to go by myself. It's that I never think of going to a movie. Even with friends, they always initiate going.
Also I'm wondering a lot about my expectations. And how that's placed me. Meaning. It's not that I expected to be married at this point, but I expected to at least be dating. Granted I'm not really putting myself out there. BUT WHAT IS THAT? Where is out there? And how do I get there? Is there a road map? Can somone lend it to me?
And about the other species. Because I'm convinced they are a different species. Our brains are made COMPLETELY differently. Is it true what media says? Is it? Are there two camps? Dork/ socially awkward/ limited personality and personality but complete jerk? Where is the middle? And why is it that only personality but jerk guy seems to be out there?
I think that's all I got.
I interviewed with new chamber lady. She was nice. I would have fun. It pays ALOT more than Kroll.
Still I start a new job next week, I can pay all my bills, what could be more exciting?
They are going to pay me on Friday, which is MUCHO MUCHO good and appreciated. They are also going to throw me a little lunch party. I think there will be champagne. Some things are so fitting. I can't decide though. Celebrating I'm leaving? Being genuinely nice? Doing what they think they're supposed to. I hear my aunt's voice in my head saying, "Does it matter?"
Guys I just don't know. It's like spinning and looking for answers, and being completely unsure which way is up. but it's good and strange.
I saw three movies this weekend. It was craziness. But it got me to thinking. A lot. One, I always see movies with people. It's not that I'm afraid to go by myself. It's that I never think of going to a movie. Even with friends, they always initiate going.
Also I'm wondering a lot about my expectations. And how that's placed me. Meaning. It's not that I expected to be married at this point, but I expected to at least be dating. Granted I'm not really putting myself out there. BUT WHAT IS THAT? Where is out there? And how do I get there? Is there a road map? Can somone lend it to me?
And about the other species. Because I'm convinced they are a different species. Our brains are made COMPLETELY differently. Is it true what media says? Is it? Are there two camps? Dork/ socially awkward/ limited personality and personality but complete jerk? Where is the middle? And why is it that only personality but jerk guy seems to be out there?
I think that's all I got.
I interviewed with new chamber lady. She was nice. I would have fun. It pays ALOT more than Kroll.
Still I start a new job next week, I can pay all my bills, what could be more exciting?