work
today at work I had my quarterly review. My boss said that, ironically, my strengths were also my weaknesses. he said my natural inquisitiveness leads to lack of focus (because i'm always bouncing all over the place) and he said that my staunch determination (hi, T :)) leads to my not knowing when to stop beating my head against the wall and find other solutions. he's right. I'll have to work on those things. I spent the last few days attempting to suck text out of pdf files, using one library that didn't really cut it, and then writing my own code (that didn't really cut it either) to do it from the bottom using the pdf spec directly. The senior developer spends 5 minutes on google and finds a library (that I *so* should have found when I looked on friday, because I swear to you I did, really!) that essentially turns the job into 5 minutes worth of actual code. and I feel like a giant tool, because I swear to god i searched for code that could help me on friday and didn't really find much, and then today I put in the phrase and the first hit is like a list of java-based pdf parsing libraries, one of which (PDFBox) is not only amazing, it's also BSD licensed, which means we can use it.
so yeah, i suck. bunches. How the hell did I miss that?
but along with my quarterly review I got a 3.5% raise effective in a month or two, so that's pretty kickass!
but i haven't eaten a thing today, nor have i picked up on the passport mess I've got to sort out.
I seem pretty intent on destroying myself/cutting myself down a lot. I've got to knock that off, too. that was the third thing my boss said - he noted that I lack confidence. I don't - I'm quite confident that I suck. ;-)
sigh. and my dad sends me apt info for san jose tonight (I guess there's a complex 1.5 blocks from the office, which would be pretty kickass because I'd never have to take a cab or use the paratransit service to get to or from work) and a 1bd is more expensive than the rent I'm paying on my 2bd in boston. I understand that I will be making more money, but still. scary. a studio is only slightly less expensive than my 2bd. it'd probably be worth it in what i save on cab fare every month though, that's a big killer here.
I dunno. blah. I got a raise today, why am I melon collie? (I always liked the visual image on that one ;-) - a collie carved out of a watermelon or something).
Probably because my chemistry can't possibly be right when I haven't eaten anything all day, eh?
go figure.
-a
so yeah, i suck. bunches. How the hell did I miss that?
but along with my quarterly review I got a 3.5% raise effective in a month or two, so that's pretty kickass!
but i haven't eaten a thing today, nor have i picked up on the passport mess I've got to sort out.
I seem pretty intent on destroying myself/cutting myself down a lot. I've got to knock that off, too. that was the third thing my boss said - he noted that I lack confidence. I don't - I'm quite confident that I suck. ;-)
sigh. and my dad sends me apt info for san jose tonight (I guess there's a complex 1.5 blocks from the office, which would be pretty kickass because I'd never have to take a cab or use the paratransit service to get to or from work) and a 1bd is more expensive than the rent I'm paying on my 2bd in boston. I understand that I will be making more money, but still. scary. a studio is only slightly less expensive than my 2bd. it'd probably be worth it in what i save on cab fare every month though, that's a big killer here.
I dunno. blah. I got a raise today, why am I melon collie? (I always liked the visual image on that one ;-) - a collie carved out of a watermelon or something).
Probably because my chemistry can't possibly be right when I haven't eaten anything all day, eh?
go figure.
-a