I'm Still Alive....I Guess
Ok so I pretty much haven't updated one of these things for a looog time...I kinda used myspace for that. But now myspace is down for maintenance and I'm kinda lost so I went back to good ol' livejournal. It's kinda funny to read everything that's been goin on w/ everybody. I've been ok pretty good up until this weekend. Homecoming was very bittersweet... I felt really pretty that night though and I "got down" and whatnot but the slow songs would come on and I would watch my friends and their boyfriends give each other that googly-i-like-you-look and gaze and be all romantic and I would just sigh. Like I want that. I don't want anymore pot-smoking drinking ambition-lacking losers....cuz I think I can do so much better. Don't I deserve someone who DOESN'T have any misdamenaors or felonies?? haha.
So anyway apart from crying by seeing my crush and his girlfriend I had lotsa fun. But then the after-party came and I didn't enojoy that so much. We went over to these juniors' house and they had six packs of coors in the fridged and tequila and crap like that. So I watched one of my good friends get drunk and I ahd to make sure she didn't get raped or crushed by the big kids that were fighting cuz they were wasted. Boy, I really do like being mom. It makes me realize what an idiot everyone becomes after they drink and that I'm not doing it again. Ew. But now it seems like I don't have any friends that don't do that so maybe I need to shift my friends again who knows. I know I feel lost, and like a lsoer wasting so much time doing what I did and what did it get me?? I fell away from my religion so much and in that aspect I feel like crap. And what's wrong with wanting a guy who will want to talk to me for more than a week before losing interest? Am I boring?? What the hell! And a guy who will want to be with me once he realizes that I will be a virgin for quite a while and won't just give up because my pants stay on. Ugghh. Well I feel a lot better, maybe I'll vent every morning just to start out the day right. hehe. If you have any advice, I'm welcome to it.
*TiNa*
So anyway apart from crying by seeing my crush and his girlfriend I had lotsa fun. But then the after-party came and I didn't enojoy that so much. We went over to these juniors' house and they had six packs of coors in the fridged and tequila and crap like that. So I watched one of my good friends get drunk and I ahd to make sure she didn't get raped or crushed by the big kids that were fighting cuz they were wasted. Boy, I really do like being mom. It makes me realize what an idiot everyone becomes after they drink and that I'm not doing it again. Ew. But now it seems like I don't have any friends that don't do that so maybe I need to shift my friends again who knows. I know I feel lost, and like a lsoer wasting so much time doing what I did and what did it get me?? I fell away from my religion so much and in that aspect I feel like crap. And what's wrong with wanting a guy who will want to talk to me for more than a week before losing interest? Am I boring?? What the hell! And a guy who will want to be with me once he realizes that I will be a virgin for quite a while and won't just give up because my pants stay on. Ugghh. Well I feel a lot better, maybe I'll vent every morning just to start out the day right. hehe. If you have any advice, I'm welcome to it.
*TiNa*