(no subject)
Woke up today irritated at Squeezums for something that he did in a dream I had. I really hate when that happens. I know that it's beyond ridiculous to hold somebody responsible for something your subconscious made up, but knowing that doesn't stop me from being irrationally out-of-sorts about it.
As the day wore on, it became more & more apparent that I didn't get the stripper spackling job (they were looking for somebody to start Wednesday, so you figure that they'd call by Monday evening or Tuesday at the latest). Another irrational irritation: I didn't want this job in the first place, but by the time I went in to interview for it (twice), I'd talked myself into it, & now I'm disapointed that I shan't be making some extra cash & compiling new stripper stories to tell my friends.
Went out to dinner w/ a friend of mine tonight, Jenny. We went to highschool together, & though we were on good terms (we mostly bonded over Latin), we didn't really move in the same circles or become very close. She went to the same college my first best friend Wanna did, though, & therefore became better friends w/ her. I've kept in occaisional touch w/ Jenny via Wanna, & spent some quality time w/ both of them (most notably at Wanna's wedding, where Jenny & I were both bridesmaids), but Jenny & I've never really hung out just the 2 of us.
Well, Jenny is in Orlando this week for some business thing (she lives in South FL), so we got together for dinner & drinks. We talked... a lot. It was way nifty.
At the same time, we talked about a lot of subjects that put me in a weird mood... like death (Mom's in particular) & relationships (she ended one not too long ago, & I saw some paralells between what she was saying & what I remember of the Time Before Squeezums). Jenny also works for Social Security, so we talked a lot about the possibility of my getting on disability, & how I should go about it. She also told me that I wasn't crazy, that I can get better, & I have so much potential that I need to realize.
It always kindof freaks me out when people say shit like that. I don't like thinking of my potential, wasted or otherwise, & I don't like to think about the possibility of getting better. I'm used to the status quo. Entropy is easy. I don't like to consider that there may be other possibilities.
So, yeah. All of these things together have put me in a rather unusual headspace.
Also, Firefox is making a very low humming sound when I scoll up & down a page. WTF is up w/ that?
As the day wore on, it became more & more apparent that I didn't get the stripper spackling job (they were looking for somebody to start Wednesday, so you figure that they'd call by Monday evening or Tuesday at the latest). Another irrational irritation: I didn't want this job in the first place, but by the time I went in to interview for it (twice), I'd talked myself into it, & now I'm disapointed that I shan't be making some extra cash & compiling new stripper stories to tell my friends.
Went out to dinner w/ a friend of mine tonight, Jenny. We went to highschool together, & though we were on good terms (we mostly bonded over Latin), we didn't really move in the same circles or become very close. She went to the same college my first best friend Wanna did, though, & therefore became better friends w/ her. I've kept in occaisional touch w/ Jenny via Wanna, & spent some quality time w/ both of them (most notably at Wanna's wedding, where Jenny & I were both bridesmaids), but Jenny & I've never really hung out just the 2 of us.
Well, Jenny is in Orlando this week for some business thing (she lives in South FL), so we got together for dinner & drinks. We talked... a lot. It was way nifty.
At the same time, we talked about a lot of subjects that put me in a weird mood... like death (Mom's in particular) & relationships (she ended one not too long ago, & I saw some paralells between what she was saying & what I remember of the Time Before Squeezums). Jenny also works for Social Security, so we talked a lot about the possibility of my getting on disability, & how I should go about it. She also told me that I wasn't crazy, that I can get better, & I have so much potential that I need to realize.
It always kindof freaks me out when people say shit like that. I don't like thinking of my potential, wasted or otherwise, & I don't like to think about the possibility of getting better. I'm used to the status quo. Entropy is easy. I don't like to consider that there may be other possibilities.
So, yeah. All of these things together have put me in a rather unusual headspace.
Also, Firefox is making a very low humming sound when I scoll up & down a page. WTF is up w/ that?