Run from that man!
I went to Blake's last night, a local outdoor live music venue and my favourite night spot in the 'buj, with a big group of friends. An older Nigerian guy, who does James Brown covers and some other tunes, performed a few songs. He's a good singer and he knows his music, but he is a dirty old man! I try never to make eye contact with him, for fear he'll drag me up on stage and attack me with his trademark pelvic thrusts. Anyhow, someone in our big group got dragged up on stage. I don't know her very well, can't even recall her name, but we've met a couple times. I can't quite recall where she is from, but I think she's from South Africa or Kenya.
She was just doing her thing, dancing near the stage, and then the older musician guy dragged her up on stage and within minutes had locked his arms around her. She was trying to pry him off, but to no avail. I thought "why is no one helping her?!" Now, I hardly know this woman, but when I see a fellow human being in need of help, especially a sister in need, I am there! I jumped up on stage and grabbed his hands to break her free, but, as I went to do so, he released her. So I danced a bit to show that I was a good sport, but the woman I rescued bolted off the stage and there I was, hand-in-hand, with the man himself! AHHHHH! I shouted after her "no, don't leave me!" I can't blame her, though, the guy is too much. I wasn't going to let him get close enough to pump his pelvis against my hips. I attempted to keep him at arms' length and when he tried to pull me closer I said "ah-ah, Oga!" (oga is like 'sir' - I believe it is a Yoruba term, but many Nigerians, from different ethnic groups, use it). Dancing, I backed away from him. I had a feeling I'd soon be in trouble, though, so I broke free a bolted across the stage, ran back across the stage behind a row of microphones, shook my ass briefly for good measure, and leaped from the stage. We were sitting right up front, so I just scooted back into my seat.
The audience loved it! They were in hysterics and the whole performance got a huge round of applause. I was a bit shakey, but grinning. My friends cheered me. They were also laughing. A woman sitting next to our table tapped me on the arm and, smiling, said "that was the best impression of the Benny Hill show that I've ever seen!" I laughed. Andrew (a British pal of mine who writes for a local paper), laughing, said "you should have seen your face, it was classic! 'no, don't leave me!' You looked horrified!" I responded, in goood humour, "well, SOMEone had to do it! I couldn't just sit here and watch!" He claimed that he would have come MY rescue if it had been me in the hot seat, but that he didn't know the woman in question. I told him that I hardly knew her either, but that the global sisterhood required me to spring to action. He raised his eyebrows at that. I also made sure to add that, as he could plainly see, I don't need rescuing. All in good fun.
All in all, it was a pretty good night, considering that fact that I was sober throughout. I haven't touched alcohol in over a week as my stomach's all wrong and I am taking antibiotics. So it goes. It'a good to have the crew back. Quite a few folks travelled for the holidays. Especially pleased to have my flatmate and Andrew, the boys, back. They drive me crazy, but keep me from falling into a well of boredom. Not that I don't have other good friends, but these two keep me jumping (which I need).
Anyhow, I'm off to watch a Peter Sellers flick (A Shot in the Dark) that I picked up the other day. After that, I'm crashing as I am beat. Hope all's well with everyone else!
She was just doing her thing, dancing near the stage, and then the older musician guy dragged her up on stage and within minutes had locked his arms around her. She was trying to pry him off, but to no avail. I thought "why is no one helping her?!" Now, I hardly know this woman, but when I see a fellow human being in need of help, especially a sister in need, I am there! I jumped up on stage and grabbed his hands to break her free, but, as I went to do so, he released her. So I danced a bit to show that I was a good sport, but the woman I rescued bolted off the stage and there I was, hand-in-hand, with the man himself! AHHHHH! I shouted after her "no, don't leave me!" I can't blame her, though, the guy is too much. I wasn't going to let him get close enough to pump his pelvis against my hips. I attempted to keep him at arms' length and when he tried to pull me closer I said "ah-ah, Oga!" (oga is like 'sir' - I believe it is a Yoruba term, but many Nigerians, from different ethnic groups, use it). Dancing, I backed away from him. I had a feeling I'd soon be in trouble, though, so I broke free a bolted across the stage, ran back across the stage behind a row of microphones, shook my ass briefly for good measure, and leaped from the stage. We were sitting right up front, so I just scooted back into my seat.
The audience loved it! They were in hysterics and the whole performance got a huge round of applause. I was a bit shakey, but grinning. My friends cheered me. They were also laughing. A woman sitting next to our table tapped me on the arm and, smiling, said "that was the best impression of the Benny Hill show that I've ever seen!" I laughed. Andrew (a British pal of mine who writes for a local paper), laughing, said "you should have seen your face, it was classic! 'no, don't leave me!' You looked horrified!" I responded, in goood humour, "well, SOMEone had to do it! I couldn't just sit here and watch!" He claimed that he would have come MY rescue if it had been me in the hot seat, but that he didn't know the woman in question. I told him that I hardly knew her either, but that the global sisterhood required me to spring to action. He raised his eyebrows at that. I also made sure to add that, as he could plainly see, I don't need rescuing. All in good fun.
All in all, it was a pretty good night, considering that fact that I was sober throughout. I haven't touched alcohol in over a week as my stomach's all wrong and I am taking antibiotics. So it goes. It'a good to have the crew back. Quite a few folks travelled for the holidays. Especially pleased to have my flatmate and Andrew, the boys, back. They drive me crazy, but keep me from falling into a well of boredom. Not that I don't have other good friends, but these two keep me jumping (which I need).
Anyhow, I'm off to watch a Peter Sellers flick (A Shot in the Dark) that I picked up the other day. After that, I'm crashing as I am beat. Hope all's well with everyone else!