Afternoon Challenge: Car Commercial
Christopher Salzman
to me
...the car doesn't run on gas, but it does run on
Go.
Zachary Korte
to Christopher
(Some well-to-do environmentalist yuppie type stands in front of a soft-focus, neutral background.)
As we all know, gas prices keep rising, and fuel costs will only increase as our natural resources become more and more scarce. America is ready for a change, but no one has been willing to step up to the plate... until now. General Motors and McDonald's have teamed up to push us into a new century of prosperity and innovation by introducing the Chevrolet Carb. This is the first automobile that will run solely on your fast food leftovers, converting them into a combustible power source that will safely & quietly drive you, as you revive the Great American Road Trip.
So save your waistline, and save the environment: The Chevrolet Carb. A new way forward.
Alternately: Are you sick of all this debt? (Frizzy-haired lady: It just won't go away!!!!!) Well now it will! Introducing the 2010 Chrysler Sebring, which gets 377 MILES PER DEBT!!!!!!! You would be crazy not to shove your debt papers into the gas tank and drive to the mooN!!!!!!!! (eats tie)
(Surely you can do better than the Chevrolet Carb. What does YOUR fictional car run on?)
Christopher Salzman
to me
Factories are closing. Business are shuttering. Homes are spontaneously burning down due to not being fed the proper amount of mortgage payments. Well, at least we can sleep easy knowing that we can always fall back on our dependence on foreign oil and cheap lead-filled Chinese goods.
Huh?!?! (cue incredulous dog and that record coming to a halt sound)
The world is changing and Oil is slowly dragging us down into the maw of hell. So how are we to get from the boring non-cigarette smoking past to the sexxy jet-packed filled future?
The Ford Nationalist is here to drive you there!
This is the SUV for you! It has five doors and an innovative forward-thinking fuel system that runs on nothing but patriotic screeds and revolutionary document recitation.
Need to get to Branson from Indianapolis? All that takes is one recitation of the Bill of Rights.
Boston to San Francisco? Try the Ten Commandments.
Mexico to Canada? [cue incredulous dog and that record coming to a halt sound]
The Nationalist. Driving you to the future!