Dragon Showed up for Chat Yesterday
Finally, completed a draft of 2 of 3 chapters of my proposal and sent it to my dissertation chair!!!! (A draft of the third one should be finished in the next 2-4 weeks - promise to myself)
I would have finished it yesterday, but I could not miss an opportunity to talk to dragon, the Indian guy. Last time i chatted with him was in July i think, which is a long time ago. I have not realized that it's because his circumstances changed and he stopped to be regular online, i came here to look for additional interactions with new people. But when chatting with him yesterday, i felt that i don't need anything else. Besides, it was him and tiger for the first 4 years who got my interest being a single person, coming to chat with me using the same login. I could not figure out the person because all those ups and downs in moods and personal qualities just did not work out together. I thought he was ideal, smart and sexy. Well... not him, but his brain... and i had this dream ( Mystery Dream), where both of them were present as separate entities. I did not understand the dream at that time, but later i realized that my unconsciousness sensed that there were two people, not one. The second invisible was that magic animal in my dream. So, when finally the Indian guy disclosed the fact that there are two of them, I started to call him dragon.
Now they are separate, tiger and dragon, and i enjoy chatting with both. It is difficult when they come online simultaneously, quality of conversations may or may not suffer, but my enjoyment reduces. Lately dragon has not been online, so I probably missed him, but I did not realize that until yesterday i chatted with him and felt happy.
Their separation period into two different names, accounts, chats, and e-mails that i have described here was enveloped in enormous amount of emotions, mostly negative. They had no agreement between each other that one was going to tell the truth to me. So tiger was pissed off to the point that he became very offensive and aggressive with his words toward dragon. Their war continued almost for a year. They had become rivals because both liked me too much. Both of them on different occasions told me directly about being in love with me and that they are aware of the same feelings on the rival's side. I was extremely mad with them for years of lies, but was too much engaged that could not just break up, so as a revenge for the hurt they caused me I added significant amount of oil to tiger's burning anger toward dragon. I can feel that these names, tiger and dragon, make the story look like a dream or at least unreal, but.... all the emotions were very much real and experienced by very real people, whom i have never ever seen or heard before. Technically, I can talk to the Indian guy over the phone, but he is not the one whom i romantically interested in, so i do not know if i will do that or when i will do that. I have no options with tiger.
I would have finished it yesterday, but I could not miss an opportunity to talk to dragon, the Indian guy. Last time i chatted with him was in July i think, which is a long time ago. I have not realized that it's because his circumstances changed and he stopped to be regular online, i came here to look for additional interactions with new people. But when chatting with him yesterday, i felt that i don't need anything else. Besides, it was him and tiger for the first 4 years who got my interest being a single person, coming to chat with me using the same login. I could not figure out the person because all those ups and downs in moods and personal qualities just did not work out together. I thought he was ideal, smart and sexy. Well... not him, but his brain... and i had this dream ( Mystery Dream), where both of them were present as separate entities. I did not understand the dream at that time, but later i realized that my unconsciousness sensed that there were two people, not one. The second invisible was that magic animal in my dream. So, when finally the Indian guy disclosed the fact that there are two of them, I started to call him dragon.
Now they are separate, tiger and dragon, and i enjoy chatting with both. It is difficult when they come online simultaneously, quality of conversations may or may not suffer, but my enjoyment reduces. Lately dragon has not been online, so I probably missed him, but I did not realize that until yesterday i chatted with him and felt happy.
Their separation period into two different names, accounts, chats, and e-mails that i have described here was enveloped in enormous amount of emotions, mostly negative. They had no agreement between each other that one was going to tell the truth to me. So tiger was pissed off to the point that he became very offensive and aggressive with his words toward dragon. Their war continued almost for a year. They had become rivals because both liked me too much. Both of them on different occasions told me directly about being in love with me and that they are aware of the same feelings on the rival's side. I was extremely mad with them for years of lies, but was too much engaged that could not just break up, so as a revenge for the hurt they caused me I added significant amount of oil to tiger's burning anger toward dragon. I can feel that these names, tiger and dragon, make the story look like a dream or at least unreal, but.... all the emotions were very much real and experienced by very real people, whom i have never ever seen or heard before. Technically, I can talk to the Indian guy over the phone, but he is not the one whom i romantically interested in, so i do not know if i will do that or when i will do that. I have no options with tiger.