Often I don't feel qualified to answer that question.
It's been an odd couple of days; business but not very social. The "work" is pretty low key and fun, but mostly with folks I only ever see or connect with on school business. So not a lot of familiar friends, except my pal and classmate Thomas.
Given all that I've felt a bit removed from everything. Drifting through as an observer, but not quite feeling in place on campus, in Portland, etc. Detached, I suppose, which is where I'm at in life these days too. I don't really have to be anywhere, or do much of anything, except keep looking for work and doing my homework. Kinda meaningless in some ways. I'm a much smarte rat when I've got something to do. Now I just sit and chew on things and wonder when it'll be different. Or maybe the ennui is gnawing on me.
Tonight and tomorrow I'm hanging out with various and sundry friends and parents (OK, the parents are less varied) and that should help a lot. I'm just too damn social to stay happy when I'm not getting my fix of real people time. Dinner will help my mood too. The college is buying at a pretty good Greek restaurant. *shrug*
As for the big picture, why not drift along? What else am I going to do?
Well...yeah. Drifting can be really clarifying sometimes. It's only pernicious when you'd rather not be drifting, but you don't have any better ideas.
I'm getting used to Dead Ho-ville...I figured out another 3-1/2-mile walk that doesn't take me up the Strip, so I don't get hollered at as much. I'm also bussing downtown and to Capitol Hill quite frequently, to do business and see my friends. Unfortunately, I'm still pretty blocked (as in, writers') so I'm not creating great art or even any sell-able articles. Which, I suppose, is fine. Drifting is sometimes necessary, even when it seems frustrating and pointless, I suppose.
I'm also getting my hair done next Wednesday. Goodbye, blue! I'm ready for a change after several years of technicolor. A little self-reinvention never hurt anyone (just ask Madonna), and looking different may just help me to see things differently and shake up the old paradigm somehow. We'll see. At the very least, I'll have a sexy new hair color.
It's been an odd couple of days; business but not very social. The "work" is pretty low key and fun, but mostly with folks I only ever see or connect with on school business. So not a lot of familiar friends, except my pal and classmate Thomas.
Given all that I've felt a bit removed from everything. Drifting through as an observer, but not quite feeling in place on campus, in Portland, etc. Detached, I suppose, which is where I'm at in life these days too. I don't really have to be anywhere, or do much of anything, except keep looking for work and doing my homework. Kinda meaningless in some ways. I'm a much smarte rat when I've got something to do. Now I just sit and chew on things and wonder when it'll be different. Or maybe the ennui is gnawing on me.
Tonight and tomorrow I'm hanging out with various and sundry friends and parents (OK, the parents are less varied) and that should help a lot. I'm just too damn social to stay happy when I'm not getting my fix of real people time. Dinner will help my mood too. The college is buying at a pretty good Greek restaurant. *shrug*
As for the big picture, why not drift along? What else am I going to do?
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I'm getting used to Dead Ho-ville...I figured out another 3-1/2-mile walk that doesn't take me up the Strip, so I don't get hollered at as much. I'm also bussing downtown and to Capitol Hill quite frequently, to do business and see my friends. Unfortunately, I'm still pretty blocked (as in, writers') so I'm not creating great art or even any sell-able articles. Which, I suppose, is fine. Drifting is sometimes necessary, even when it seems frustrating and pointless, I suppose.
I'm also getting my hair done next Wednesday. Goodbye, blue! I'm ready for a change after several years of technicolor. A little self-reinvention never hurt anyone (just ask Madonna), and looking different may just help me to see things differently and shake up the old paradigm somehow. We'll see. At the very least, I'll have a sexy new hair color.
Rock on. Write back when you feel like it.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
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