I thought it was a gorgeous movie, and very, very observant.
But the thing that struck me, the thing that sticks with me, was the nastiness of the fights-like you said, the scene where Clem comes in late and the scene in the market, but also the scene but between his married friends, in which laundry gets flung. They're honest scenes and the characters are unflinchingly portrayed, but they hurt to watch. It's heartachingly sad to see how love can take all the knowledge and understanding gained through the times together and use them to rip into someone, angrily and brutally.
I know that people lash out and intentionally hurt each other. But none of my lovers has ever done that to me. Some of them have done quite enough damage when they weren't trying to, it's true.
And I understand the impulse to hurt back. I've been nasty in social situations. Just never deliberately to anyone I loved. Which isn't to say I've never hurt anyone. Just that I've never said hurtful things just for the sake of hurtfulness.
Yes, I'd agree with you that it's important to know all the facts and many of the opinions. But I think I've been lucky to avoid lovers who use those very facts for no purpose beyond making me feel bad.
But the thing that struck me, the thing that sticks with me, was the nastiness of the fights-like you said, the scene where Clem comes in late and the scene in the market, but also the scene but between his married friends, in which laundry gets flung. They're honest scenes and the characters are unflinchingly portrayed, but they hurt to watch. It's heartachingly sad to see how love can take all the knowledge and understanding gained through the times together and use them to rip into someone, angrily and brutally.
I know that people lash out and intentionally hurt each other. But none of my lovers has ever done that to me. Some of them have done quite enough damage when they weren't trying to, it's true.
And I understand the impulse to hurt back. I've been nasty in social situations. Just never deliberately to anyone I loved. Which isn't to say I've never hurt anyone. Just that I've never said hurtful things just for the sake of hurtfulness.
Yes, I'd agree with you that it's important to know all the facts and many of the opinions. But I think I've been lucky to avoid lovers who use those very facts for no purpose beyond making me feel bad.
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