Strange Calculus
So a few weird things happened to me today:
1.) The mouse in my car. A few months ago, our sometimes indoor/sometimes out door cat got attacked by a canine of some sort. We're not sure if it was a coyote, fox, or the cousin's nasty-ass dalmatians, but suffice it to say we don't let him out anymore. I guess with winter coming and the cat out of the picture, the mice are coming closer looking for warm dry places to hide. One of the little guys must have thought the little blue truck was just far away enough from the houses to be safe (and there were probably some leftover crumbs to nom, I admit). Well, not safe enough, because the engine gets really hot really quick. (I don't have to turn the heat on as long as the airflow is directed front-to-back instead of circulating.) About a quarter of the way to school, I see a little movement on the passenger side out of the corner of my eye. I'm used to spiders and things in cooler transition months hiding out, only to later escape the heat of the vents, but this is the first time I've had a mousey! I barely even saw him until he moved to escape again, he matched the gray of the door so well! He was very cute and I wanted to keep him, but I knew he wasn't tame and would probably get hurt if I handled him too hard, or try to bite out of fear. So I slowed down and leaned over, and after he scurried onto the dash and out of biting/breaking range, I opened the door to let him out. Hopefully they don't have cats at that farm! Eh, its the kind of farm where they say its a farm just so they can have land and a few horses.
2.) One of the guys at school gave me a strange but pretty costume necklace he "won at the con" (AUSA, which I missed). I really need to stop being so nice to people; it's unfortunate when they get crushes on me when I can't reciprocate (guys, some girls), or expect me to be so helpful/knowledgeable the next time they see me(customers, classmates), when, really, I was just in a good mood. Though we did have a laugh deciding to tag-team the extra credit question on the final in Old Dead White Guys 250. "Amend or add to Dante's Inferno with some of today's sins. What would they be, and what circle would they fall into? If they do not, what would be their punishment?" We have our final torment laid out: Twilight Fans. As in, "being subjected to."
3.) I had a guy ask me on the phone how many perimeters were in an inch. I had already explained, that yes, we carry measuring tapes that had both metric and imperial (I had to tell him that yes, that is the name for what we use) and that they could be used for measuring all sorts of things for making clothes like "bodies and legs and things." I had also told him that his pattern couldn't possibly be calling for anything "km," as that was kilometers, and unless he was a surveyor or car mechanic, he wouldn't ever need those. That led to my explaining that it must be in "cm" because that was an awfully high number, and yes I can translate that to yards. No, there are no kilometers in a yard (unless you count the 1/1094th or .000914 that it is), as comparing a yard and a kilometer is like comparing a foot to a mile.
"Wait, how many feet are in a mile?" he asked.
My reply, "5280," was met with stunned (and stunning) incomprehension. It was not, I fear, for my gross exaggeration (there are only 1094 yards in a kilometer or 3282 feet, versus the 1760 yards in a mile). "But I need to measure in perimeters, right?"
"Certainly sir. Otherwise you'd be going through yourself, and that would require some strange calculus. Unlucky for me, you don't."
"But how many perimeters are in an inch?"
"Depends on how small the thing you're measuring is. I can tell you that as long as you're measuring yourself or other people, we have what you need."
"You're sure they'll work? How big are they?"
"Our metric is more than two meters long. Unless you are Shaq, you aren't bigger than that."
"It's for my clothes to fit, yeah..."
"That would be why you called the sewing store."
To be fair, I had already had the discussion with him about perimeter being the measurement around things, and that that was why he needed the measure-tape.
And I had told people I missed math! I think this guy is going to force me to get a teaching certificate, just so I can sub a few math classes whilst I'm a librarian.
To allay my terrible need to strangle the entirety of the human race (or just the people who had to have give this man all the good alcohol) with a specially-made, kilometer-long measure-tape, I grabbed some last-minute chinese from down the strip, and watched this wonderful video when I got home.
Merlin Cast, why so awesome?
1.) The mouse in my car. A few months ago, our sometimes indoor/sometimes out door cat got attacked by a canine of some sort. We're not sure if it was a coyote, fox, or the cousin's nasty-ass dalmatians, but suffice it to say we don't let him out anymore. I guess with winter coming and the cat out of the picture, the mice are coming closer looking for warm dry places to hide. One of the little guys must have thought the little blue truck was just far away enough from the houses to be safe (and there were probably some leftover crumbs to nom, I admit). Well, not safe enough, because the engine gets really hot really quick. (I don't have to turn the heat on as long as the airflow is directed front-to-back instead of circulating.) About a quarter of the way to school, I see a little movement on the passenger side out of the corner of my eye. I'm used to spiders and things in cooler transition months hiding out, only to later escape the heat of the vents, but this is the first time I've had a mousey! I barely even saw him until he moved to escape again, he matched the gray of the door so well! He was very cute and I wanted to keep him, but I knew he wasn't tame and would probably get hurt if I handled him too hard, or try to bite out of fear. So I slowed down and leaned over, and after he scurried onto the dash and out of biting/breaking range, I opened the door to let him out. Hopefully they don't have cats at that farm! Eh, its the kind of farm where they say its a farm just so they can have land and a few horses.
2.) One of the guys at school gave me a strange but pretty costume necklace he "won at the con" (AUSA, which I missed). I really need to stop being so nice to people; it's unfortunate when they get crushes on me when I can't reciprocate (guys, some girls), or expect me to be so helpful/knowledgeable the next time they see me(customers, classmates), when, really, I was just in a good mood. Though we did have a laugh deciding to tag-team the extra credit question on the final in Old Dead White Guys 250. "Amend or add to Dante's Inferno with some of today's sins. What would they be, and what circle would they fall into? If they do not, what would be their punishment?" We have our final torment laid out: Twilight Fans. As in, "being subjected to."
3.) I had a guy ask me on the phone how many perimeters were in an inch. I had already explained, that yes, we carry measuring tapes that had both metric and imperial (I had to tell him that yes, that is the name for what we use) and that they could be used for measuring all sorts of things for making clothes like "bodies and legs and things." I had also told him that his pattern couldn't possibly be calling for anything "km," as that was kilometers, and unless he was a surveyor or car mechanic, he wouldn't ever need those. That led to my explaining that it must be in "cm" because that was an awfully high number, and yes I can translate that to yards. No, there are no kilometers in a yard (unless you count the 1/1094th or .000914 that it is), as comparing a yard and a kilometer is like comparing a foot to a mile.
"Wait, how many feet are in a mile?" he asked.
My reply, "5280," was met with stunned (and stunning) incomprehension. It was not, I fear, for my gross exaggeration (there are only 1094 yards in a kilometer or 3282 feet, versus the 1760 yards in a mile). "But I need to measure in perimeters, right?"
"Certainly sir. Otherwise you'd be going through yourself, and that would require some strange calculus. Unlucky for me, you don't."
"But how many perimeters are in an inch?"
"Depends on how small the thing you're measuring is. I can tell you that as long as you're measuring yourself or other people, we have what you need."
"You're sure they'll work? How big are they?"
"Our metric is more than two meters long. Unless you are Shaq, you aren't bigger than that."
"It's for my clothes to fit, yeah..."
"That would be why you called the sewing store."
To be fair, I had already had the discussion with him about perimeter being the measurement around things, and that that was why he needed the measure-tape.
And I had told people I missed math! I think this guy is going to force me to get a teaching certificate, just so I can sub a few math classes whilst I'm a librarian.
To allay my terrible need to strangle the entirety of the human race (or just the people who had to have give this man all the good alcohol) with a specially-made, kilometer-long measure-tape, I grabbed some last-minute chinese from down the strip, and watched this wonderful video when I got home.
Click to viewMerlin Cast, why so awesome?