I'm learning.
Today I dropped the cereal canister and the lid came off. Cereal all over the rug. Cue the feedback loop of "Stupid, clumsy, not paying attention, wasting food and money (&c.)".
Then a realization hit: Emily. What is SHE going to say?
Well, first she will ask if I'm OK.
Then she will ask if I want her to pick up more cereal.
If I'm still frazzling out about it, she will remind me "That is why it's called an ACCIDENT. No harm, no blame, let it be."
And I felt better and was able to clean it up without crying and coming apart.
When she got home I was able to tell her about it and I made sure to thank her for helping me "reprogram" my responses.
That's all I was going to post for now.