Why Now? I'm Sleepy and Bitchy
I got this e-mail...I don't want to think about it right now...I don't want to accept apologies right now...I don't have the energy to right now. Already had to accept apologies from my dad this week and it takes a lot when the bitch in me screaming "DIE FUCKERS" or something to that extent. What do I do when I've lost all strength to be kind?
"I was cleaning out a box in my closet last night and I found all the letters that we gave each other during that whole thing we had happen in 9th grade. While we were in the midst of being completely pissed at each other I didn't understand why. I was just mad at you because you seemed to be mad at me. But I remember basically giving up because I found you to be more stubborn than I am (that's meant in a good way). I guess it kinda fixed itself for a while but over the summer something happened again. As I was reading these letters I realized that I was a horrible friend. I seemed to turn everything around so that I was always the victim. So I would be the one to get all the attention when it was really someone else who needed it more. I realized that you're not the only person I've done this with but you are the only one who gets this email. Jessica I'm sorry for being such a crapy friend. You were my closest friend in 8th grade and I could talk to you about anything. You understood me because a lot of the things that had happened to me had also happened to you. Although they were on separate levels I always had the feeling that you understood and that you were really listening rather than just pretending to. I don't exactly know what happened to that but I know that I miss it. Jessy I'd like a second chance at being your friend. I'd like to start from the beginning again and see what we can get from it. I have a new email address now because I got sick of AOL but I wanted to send you this from this address so you knew who I was. Even though this one isn't hard to figure out. It's ***** So if you could email me back there instead of here that would be great. That is if you decided to actually email me back. I really hope I do hear from you soon Jessica. If not, please take care of yourself and I'll see you across the room at church sometime.
~Laura"
"I was cleaning out a box in my closet last night and I found all the letters that we gave each other during that whole thing we had happen in 9th grade. While we were in the midst of being completely pissed at each other I didn't understand why. I was just mad at you because you seemed to be mad at me. But I remember basically giving up because I found you to be more stubborn than I am (that's meant in a good way). I guess it kinda fixed itself for a while but over the summer something happened again. As I was reading these letters I realized that I was a horrible friend. I seemed to turn everything around so that I was always the victim. So I would be the one to get all the attention when it was really someone else who needed it more. I realized that you're not the only person I've done this with but you are the only one who gets this email. Jessica I'm sorry for being such a crapy friend. You were my closest friend in 8th grade and I could talk to you about anything. You understood me because a lot of the things that had happened to me had also happened to you. Although they were on separate levels I always had the feeling that you understood and that you were really listening rather than just pretending to. I don't exactly know what happened to that but I know that I miss it. Jessy I'd like a second chance at being your friend. I'd like to start from the beginning again and see what we can get from it. I have a new email address now because I got sick of AOL but I wanted to send you this from this address so you knew who I was. Even though this one isn't hard to figure out. It's ***** So if you could email me back there instead of here that would be great. That is if you decided to actually email me back. I really hope I do hear from you soon Jessica. If not, please take care of yourself and I'll see you across the room at church sometime.
~Laura"