(no subject)
At the end of the day I'm just lonely. I don't expect anyone to fix it or anyone to care. I'm terrified that I will always be as lonely and empty as I am now. I don't try to get close to people to have relationships. Certainly not romantic ones. It would be nice to be romantic with someone but, I've tried so much and it always ends up hurting me with little gained or learned. And no period of bliss to counter the heartache I feel in the end. Maybe I just fall for the wrong people but, that's the way it goes. I wasn't talking to you, or anyone else for that matter hoping to find a place in your heart. I don't expect anyone to have room in their heart for me. If you hurt, I want you to not hurt. It's as simple as that. I feel shit every day. Suicidal, lonely, empty, bitter. The only thing that makes me feel any better is sparing others the pain that I myself have suffered. I doubt it means anything to anyone. But it's the only thing keeping me alive.
If I said I just want to be loved by someone, it wouldn't mean anything because nobody will ever love me. I am a terrible human being and I don't deserve to be happy.
If I said I just want to be loved by someone, it wouldn't mean anything because nobody will ever love me. I am a terrible human being and I don't deserve to be happy.