Feeling Insufficient
It's one of those times.
You just have this out of body experience.
Feeling small, and worthless.
Somewhat helpless
You want to cry because it might make you feel better
But then you don't know what you would be crying about
It's day 4.5 of this feeling.
It's ridiculous, I shouldn't feel this...
I hate to admit it.
I've become attached.
I love it.
But when it's gone (even if it's coming back)
I feel sad. overwhelmed. insufficient. lonely.
The sadness could sound draining.
But once it's back it's like im back to life.
I wish other people (actually a particular person)
saw the fire that was produced when we're together
the love that's in our eyes
It breaks my heart when I think about that moment.
That moment you destroyed a layer of my shell.
How bad I wanted to say things to you.
How you could attempt to break someone like that.
Well you didn't succeed.
You could never break me.
Just watch out, because next time... it might not go as smoothly.
My mouth will not stay shut.
And don't worry, I can stoop to your level.
I was the bigger person.
All we wanted was for us ALL to get along.
all I wanted....
-------
so things take a turn
subjects change colors
topics change their season
mouth waters
yet is thirsty for things to say
Goosebumps climb up my legs
i should close the window
but this fleece will suffice
Curled under a blanket I use to despise.
it's touch, it's warmth, it's texture
Everything I despised has become so warming.
Sleep isn't the same without it.
All I want is sleep
Sleep has been leaving me.
Come back.
You just have this out of body experience.
Feeling small, and worthless.
Somewhat helpless
You want to cry because it might make you feel better
But then you don't know what you would be crying about
It's day 4.5 of this feeling.
It's ridiculous, I shouldn't feel this...
I hate to admit it.
I've become attached.
I love it.
But when it's gone (even if it's coming back)
I feel sad. overwhelmed. insufficient. lonely.
The sadness could sound draining.
But once it's back it's like im back to life.
I wish other people (actually a particular person)
saw the fire that was produced when we're together
the love that's in our eyes
It breaks my heart when I think about that moment.
That moment you destroyed a layer of my shell.
How bad I wanted to say things to you.
How you could attempt to break someone like that.
Well you didn't succeed.
You could never break me.
Just watch out, because next time... it might not go as smoothly.
My mouth will not stay shut.
And don't worry, I can stoop to your level.
I was the bigger person.
All we wanted was for us ALL to get along.
all I wanted....
-------
so things take a turn
subjects change colors
topics change their season
mouth waters
yet is thirsty for things to say
Goosebumps climb up my legs
i should close the window
but this fleece will suffice
Curled under a blanket I use to despise.
it's touch, it's warmth, it's texture
Everything I despised has become so warming.
Sleep isn't the same without it.
All I want is sleep
Sleep has been leaving me.
Come back.