Gary Chapman, I sort of love you.
I bought the five love languages this weekend after suggestions from two friends that don't know each other (Sierra and Justin) and then as I went to the front to purchase it, the cashier even said "Ooooh, I've heard that book is really good." It wasn't in that insincere way, obviously because I was already buying the book, there was no need to try and sell it further.
I'm not much into self help books, which this technically isn't, it was coined "inspirational" by the section it was in (Christian Inspiration to be exact). I took the quiz in the back and found myself to speak the love language of physical touch, to my surprise. I don't know how I didn't see it before, I'm the type of person that when I'm upset, or lonely, I just want someone to hold me, or hug me and on occasion, tell me it'll be alright. Quality time came in second, which didn't really surprise me as much. I actually got Jessie to take his part of the quiz the next night and found his primary language to be Quality Time and secondary as Words of Affirmation. Quality time for him for the most part is just being together, it doesn't include quality conversation, which I can see still as being quality time...for instance, we can be in the car together and be comfortable staying silent the whole ride. Or right now, we're home sick together. Maybe I've overlooked a lot of the things we do for each other when I started this book feeling neglected, or maybe I just wanted my opinions heard by Jessie, whichever, I got both taken care of last night.
I've been asking him to read the physical touch chapter for about 2 days now and he simply said "maybe", also told me he didn't like "those kinds of books". I know this, he likes entertaining books, not something that can be used practically. Last night when we got home from Chicago though, I sat next to him while he was at the computer and went "Could you do me a favor, please?" "You want me to read the book don't you?" I told him I did, but this wasn't the favor I was asking for. I was tired and a little in need of my form of love. This gave me the opportunity to explain to him what I'd been feeling the last couple weeks, and it worked. I told him that I communicate love through touch, and I know he didn't, but I really needed him to try. I know he loves me, but there are times when I need it shown, a little touch on the leg when we're sitting next to each other, a hand gently pressed to the back as we're passing each other, a hug when I'm upset, a kiss when just simply looking at him and of course, sex. The latter isn't as important at the others, but it is part of my language, it happens, just not as often as I'd like. He knows this and has made immense effort in the past 23 hours, despite both of us being sick.
I really am lucky to have someone like him, even though he's not the most expressive person, I know I mean more to him than I even know.
I'm not much into self help books, which this technically isn't, it was coined "inspirational" by the section it was in (Christian Inspiration to be exact). I took the quiz in the back and found myself to speak the love language of physical touch, to my surprise. I don't know how I didn't see it before, I'm the type of person that when I'm upset, or lonely, I just want someone to hold me, or hug me and on occasion, tell me it'll be alright. Quality time came in second, which didn't really surprise me as much. I actually got Jessie to take his part of the quiz the next night and found his primary language to be Quality Time and secondary as Words of Affirmation. Quality time for him for the most part is just being together, it doesn't include quality conversation, which I can see still as being quality time...for instance, we can be in the car together and be comfortable staying silent the whole ride. Or right now, we're home sick together. Maybe I've overlooked a lot of the things we do for each other when I started this book feeling neglected, or maybe I just wanted my opinions heard by Jessie, whichever, I got both taken care of last night.
I've been asking him to read the physical touch chapter for about 2 days now and he simply said "maybe", also told me he didn't like "those kinds of books". I know this, he likes entertaining books, not something that can be used practically. Last night when we got home from Chicago though, I sat next to him while he was at the computer and went "Could you do me a favor, please?" "You want me to read the book don't you?" I told him I did, but this wasn't the favor I was asking for. I was tired and a little in need of my form of love. This gave me the opportunity to explain to him what I'd been feeling the last couple weeks, and it worked. I told him that I communicate love through touch, and I know he didn't, but I really needed him to try. I know he loves me, but there are times when I need it shown, a little touch on the leg when we're sitting next to each other, a hand gently pressed to the back as we're passing each other, a hug when I'm upset, a kiss when just simply looking at him and of course, sex. The latter isn't as important at the others, but it is part of my language, it happens, just not as often as I'd like. He knows this and has made immense effort in the past 23 hours, despite both of us being sick.
I really am lucky to have someone like him, even though he's not the most expressive person, I know I mean more to him than I even know.