For future reference.
So, last week I joined this community poor_skills after seeing it mentioned in someone else's journal. It is essentially "tips & tricks on living poor" "the community devoted to people living without vast amounts of money". The very first rule of this community is "1. DO NOT make judgments on anyone in this community. This is a hate free zone and we value and respect people from all walks of life, so do not preach to the choir here, make assumptions of someone's character, belittle people in any way....etc." A good rule, right? One that the almost 10,000 people in this community don't seem to follow, though. I read the posts and comments for 20 minutes and found myself with a tummyache at how much judgment and vitriol was being tossed around. I finally brought myself to make a post about it this morning and am posting it here for future reference, as it is likely that it will not be approved by the moderators and/or deleted. Feel free to read and check out the community. I'm sure you will notice what I speak to.
Sincerely,
~Your friend Lindsay who has and always has been POOR AS FUCK.
"Hello all.
I am a new to member to this community...I came across it a few days ago in another friend's journal, as she was going through some food-stamp troubles and one of her friends referred her here. Having been poor pretty much since I left home at the age of 18, I thought this would be a great community to be a part of! With such a large membership, I looked forward to hearing others' stories on struggling & getting by and how they coped with their situations. I looked forward to great tips and helpful advice. I looked forward to a community, honestly, where people really and truly understood what it meant to be poor.
Unfortunately, that is not what I have found here at all. On Wednesday, within the first 20 minutes of reading posts in this community, I felt sick to my stomach at how much judgment was being thrown around here by members and towards other members. Additionally, I saw a lot of evidence through comments that perhaps some members here choose to live poor, in order that they might save up to pay off debt or buy a house. I don't object at all to living frugally but I think there is a big difference between someone who lives frugally and is able to save 1/3 of their paycheck every month and someone who lives frugally because they have no other option, as their paycheck is gone before it even enters their hands. I think there is a difference between idealistic people who can afford to avoid corporate hounds like WalMart and shop at Trader Joe's and those that only have $40 to buy themselves & their children food for a whole week. I wholeheartedly believe in supporting local businesses, encouraging entrepreneurial endeavors, avoiding the big corporate giants but most of the time, I find myself with only that $40 to spend and I have to make it go as far as possible.
I feel very disheartened at how people seem to treat each other here. I can think of two specific posts in which the original poster asked a reasonable question or explained a situation objectively looking for advice and was met with a lot of criticism, judgment, and self-aggrandizement. It seems people here think they know what's best for everyone's life and are less interested in offering a sympathetic ear to struggles they may know nothing at all about. I wanted to make this post a few days ago but haven't had the time. Today, I sign in and check things out one more time, hoping to see a change. Nope. None at all. The very first comment to the very first post I read was full of value judgments on the poster's life as opposed to helpful advice regarding the topic they posted on.
This may be deleted and I understand if it is. I understand if most of you could care less about what I'm saying. After all, I'm just one person and this is just one person's opinion. As a newcomer to this group, though, I feel I am possibly in a more objective position to take a good, hard look at the attitudes of some members here and I have to say I find them quite lacking. Perhaps it's just a difference in opinion, but I believe in being kind to everyone...especially those who are struggling every day just to get through the next. The less fortunate among us do not need flippant remarks from strangers...they need to be built up and supported.
It's called community. Maybe we should all try to act more like one."
Sincerely,
~Your friend Lindsay who has and always has been POOR AS FUCK.
"Hello all.
I am a new to member to this community...I came across it a few days ago in another friend's journal, as she was going through some food-stamp troubles and one of her friends referred her here. Having been poor pretty much since I left home at the age of 18, I thought this would be a great community to be a part of! With such a large membership, I looked forward to hearing others' stories on struggling & getting by and how they coped with their situations. I looked forward to great tips and helpful advice. I looked forward to a community, honestly, where people really and truly understood what it meant to be poor.
Unfortunately, that is not what I have found here at all. On Wednesday, within the first 20 minutes of reading posts in this community, I felt sick to my stomach at how much judgment was being thrown around here by members and towards other members. Additionally, I saw a lot of evidence through comments that perhaps some members here choose to live poor, in order that they might save up to pay off debt or buy a house. I don't object at all to living frugally but I think there is a big difference between someone who lives frugally and is able to save 1/3 of their paycheck every month and someone who lives frugally because they have no other option, as their paycheck is gone before it even enters their hands. I think there is a difference between idealistic people who can afford to avoid corporate hounds like WalMart and shop at Trader Joe's and those that only have $40 to buy themselves & their children food for a whole week. I wholeheartedly believe in supporting local businesses, encouraging entrepreneurial endeavors, avoiding the big corporate giants but most of the time, I find myself with only that $40 to spend and I have to make it go as far as possible.
I feel very disheartened at how people seem to treat each other here. I can think of two specific posts in which the original poster asked a reasonable question or explained a situation objectively looking for advice and was met with a lot of criticism, judgment, and self-aggrandizement. It seems people here think they know what's best for everyone's life and are less interested in offering a sympathetic ear to struggles they may know nothing at all about. I wanted to make this post a few days ago but haven't had the time. Today, I sign in and check things out one more time, hoping to see a change. Nope. None at all. The very first comment to the very first post I read was full of value judgments on the poster's life as opposed to helpful advice regarding the topic they posted on.
This may be deleted and I understand if it is. I understand if most of you could care less about what I'm saying. After all, I'm just one person and this is just one person's opinion. As a newcomer to this group, though, I feel I am possibly in a more objective position to take a good, hard look at the attitudes of some members here and I have to say I find them quite lacking. Perhaps it's just a difference in opinion, but I believe in being kind to everyone...especially those who are struggling every day just to get through the next. The less fortunate among us do not need flippant remarks from strangers...they need to be built up and supported.
It's called community. Maybe we should all try to act more like one."