High School Dreaming
..walking along the asphalt, on the way to the grandstand. he takes a look at the last gazebo, and sees her group just hanging out. trying to act all nonchalante about it, so his friends don't notice, he takes a quick glance, trying to spot her familiar face. upon sitting down at the grandstand, he finally spots her, and there, his heart begins to race. faster. faster. faster. their eyes meet. the twinkle in her eyes, amazing, be it from 50 meters or 2 inches away. her gaze, electric. the sunlight bouncing off her eyes, beautiful. just beautiful. he couldn't help but stare.
~a blur in the signals, hazy conversation, curved lines, insane interference, memory loss~
he and she, they, get together. they hang out, just talking, walking, laughing. he and she, they, could see the radiant smile on each other's face. this radiance, the look of people basking in the beautiful simplicity of love. this is what it was. after his history of complicated relationships and messed up priorities, and her history of a lack of commitment in any relationship, this was the kind of interaction they needed. the kind of relationship they would thrive in. all he wants is love. all she wants is love. fulfilling each others need to be loved, it was as simple as that. it helped that he made her fall in love for the first time. and she returned the favor.
~mostly inference, uncertainty, based on broken facts, left and right~
he walks her to class, slowly, hand in hand. his heart, thumping as hard and fast as it was when he first met her; when he first realized she was the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. arriving at the classroom, he knew there was something wrong. the smile was wiped off her face, upon seeing her classmates taking an exam. all the simplicity, everything that kept it together, was falling apart. she started seeing the so-called flaws.
"you're a bad influence!"
"we're too different, in the most important of aspects!"
"sometimes this love you speak of isn't enough. we're not practical. we just won't work."
she ran into the room, without a goodbye. he felt her fingers, one by one, slowly letting go. yet, he couldn't do anything about it. as much as he wanted to hang on, there was some truth to those things she told him. the fear, the realization, paralyzed him. breaking down, he could only look on, as she ran further and further away from him. not just in this moment, not just because of the exam. she went away, and left this gaping hole in his heart he just couldn't fill again, no matter how hard he tried. he trudged away, a broken man.
he talked less. his smile wasn't seen as often, and the sincerity which made his smile special was gone. his laughter, a sound so rare that it surprised his friends whenever it did occur. his drive, his motivation, his reason, for most if not all of everything he did, gone. he couldn't stand it. everywhere he turned, he saw her face. every song on the radio, reminded him of her. it couldn't be this way. so, should he go back to her, pride out the window, and try to mend it?
haha, guess not. he took the easy way out. he cut her off from his life. he made it a point not to let her know how he was, and what important things were happening in his life. he threw out everything that reminded him of her, and let me tell you, he threw out A LOT. he purged himself, or at least tried. tried and failed? well, we'll see. the beginning is always the hardest part.
he's trying to learn to let go, of something that never was his in the first place.
he's trying to learn to move on, and pick up the pieces of his broken heart.
he's trying to learn to love, as real and sincere and unconditional as he did towards her.
he's trying to learn to live, with or without her in his life.
he's trying, and that's what's important.
~a blur in the signals, hazy conversation, curved lines, insane interference, memory loss~
he and she, they, get together. they hang out, just talking, walking, laughing. he and she, they, could see the radiant smile on each other's face. this radiance, the look of people basking in the beautiful simplicity of love. this is what it was. after his history of complicated relationships and messed up priorities, and her history of a lack of commitment in any relationship, this was the kind of interaction they needed. the kind of relationship they would thrive in. all he wants is love. all she wants is love. fulfilling each others need to be loved, it was as simple as that. it helped that he made her fall in love for the first time. and she returned the favor.
~mostly inference, uncertainty, based on broken facts, left and right~
he walks her to class, slowly, hand in hand. his heart, thumping as hard and fast as it was when he first met her; when he first realized she was the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. arriving at the classroom, he knew there was something wrong. the smile was wiped off her face, upon seeing her classmates taking an exam. all the simplicity, everything that kept it together, was falling apart. she started seeing the so-called flaws.
"you're a bad influence!"
"we're too different, in the most important of aspects!"
"sometimes this love you speak of isn't enough. we're not practical. we just won't work."
she ran into the room, without a goodbye. he felt her fingers, one by one, slowly letting go. yet, he couldn't do anything about it. as much as he wanted to hang on, there was some truth to those things she told him. the fear, the realization, paralyzed him. breaking down, he could only look on, as she ran further and further away from him. not just in this moment, not just because of the exam. she went away, and left this gaping hole in his heart he just couldn't fill again, no matter how hard he tried. he trudged away, a broken man.
he talked less. his smile wasn't seen as often, and the sincerity which made his smile special was gone. his laughter, a sound so rare that it surprised his friends whenever it did occur. his drive, his motivation, his reason, for most if not all of everything he did, gone. he couldn't stand it. everywhere he turned, he saw her face. every song on the radio, reminded him of her. it couldn't be this way. so, should he go back to her, pride out the window, and try to mend it?
haha, guess not. he took the easy way out. he cut her off from his life. he made it a point not to let her know how he was, and what important things were happening in his life. he threw out everything that reminded him of her, and let me tell you, he threw out A LOT. he purged himself, or at least tried. tried and failed? well, we'll see. the beginning is always the hardest part.
he's trying to learn to let go, of something that never was his in the first place.
he's trying to learn to move on, and pick up the pieces of his broken heart.
he's trying to learn to love, as real and sincere and unconditional as he did towards her.
he's trying to learn to live, with or without her in his life.
he's trying, and that's what's important.