a fev vords abut ze nev languag
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The European Commission have just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would be known as EuroEnglish.
In the first year, s will replace the soft c. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard c will be dropped in favour of the k. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome ph will be replased with the f. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the third year, publik akseptance of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated modifikations are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a detergent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent e in the languag is disgraceful and they should go away.
By the fourth yar, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing th with z , and w with v.
During ze fifz yar, ze unesesary o kan be dropd for vords kontaining ou and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz yar, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls o difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu undestand ech ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KOM TRU!
via 2b-neman
The European Commission have just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would be known as EuroEnglish.
In the first year, s will replace the soft c. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard c will be dropped in favour of the k. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome ph will be replased with the f. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the third year, publik akseptance of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated modifikations are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a detergent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent e in the languag is disgraceful and they should go away.
By the fourth yar, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing th with z , and w with v.
During ze fifz yar, ze unesesary o kan be dropd for vords kontaining ou and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz yar, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls o difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu undestand ech ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KOM TRU!
via 2b-neman