Why do I bother?
Really what is the point of anything. It all ends the same and starts the same. It's seems the point of life is how much shit you can put up with before it's all over. The worst part is you don't even get to know when it is all over and as far as I can tell you never get to find out. I think when you die it is over. Just eternal blackness and
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-H.N.
"Oh my soul, do not aspire to an immortal life, but instead exhaust the limits of the possible."
-P.p iii I love this one...
Things do feel better when you are honest, even if it is perhaps in a negative way, because at least the honesty is something, right? It can be the one thing that is okay, sometimes. I still spare people's feelings, but I'm finding that I'm a lot more open about what I'm thinking, trying to put honesty as my main focus in pretty much everything. It's an admirable trait, but no one's saying it's an easy practice. Be honest with me now: have a ever treated you in a way that hurt you? If so, I am genuinely sorry.
It sounds like you're having a rough time right now. If you can't find a reason to live for within yourself, or within your immediate life (day to day, work, etc.), perhaps I will remind you that there are at least us 4 people here in Victoria that care about you. I, personally, am worried, but mostly just wishing there was something I could offer you that might sort things out a bit, or at least ease the suffering. I can honestly say that I've been where you are, and if you can find a reason to hold out and maybe even hold some hope, you will find your meaning.
If you ever want to talk, my inbox is always open...
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