Repost - KuroFai community Round Robin #35
(originally by onette)
Arashi led the five of them--yes, five, Kurogane would be damned if that stupid manjuu bun ever had another fit like the one he’d just witnessed again--down the hall to a guest room, where she unrolled two futons.
“This is all we have,” she said calmly and bowed in apology, “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” Syaoran said, bowing, “Thank you, Arashi-san.”
They decided that Fai and Sakura would take the beds--tonight had taken the hardest toll on them, and within a few minutes, both of the children and the manjuu had fallen to sleep, Mokona snuggled up in Sakura’s arms. Knowing this, Kurogane allowed himself to stare long and hard at Fai, certain that the mage wasn’t sleeping. Fai never slept on his back. After a few minutes of pretending, at last the mage gave up, and Kurogane simply continued to stare, unspeaking.
He knew he couldn’t force Fai to talk, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t try to help him.
“I suppose you’re going to try to get me to tell you what’s happened,” Fai said quietly, covering his eyes with his arm, “Ne, Kuro-sama?”
“I’m not going to force you to tell me anything,” he said calmly, “but I’m not going to sit here and watch you blame yourself, either.”
Fai laid there in silence for a moment, keeping his eyes covered. After a long moment, he finally spoke again, a heartbroken smile curving his lips, “I can’t tell you what you want to hear, Kuro-sama… I can’t not blame myself for the things that have happened.”
The magician went silent for a moment, and Kurogane could tell that he was trying hard not to let himself break. He waited in patient silence, arms folded as he leaned back against the wall.
“It was nice,” he continued quietly, “to not feel that pain, if only for a while. But… I knew it would come back. Somehow I knew. This pain isn’t the sort you can simply wish away. What’s happened isn’t the sort of thing you can escape from, Kuro-sama. Not for long.” Fai shook his head, “I’m sorry.”
Kurogane sighed, “Idiot. Don’t apologize.”
Leaning over, he peeled Fai’s arm away from his eyes, silently cursing himself when he saw the sorrowful blue eyes that lay beneath.
“I don’t claim to know what happened in your past,” he said, “Hell, I don’t even care what happened in your past. It’s none of my business. But…” Ah, dammit, he was going to sound like a total sap, “It is my business when you’re hurting like this. Because no matter what, we’re all in this together. We have to protect each other and I don’t want to see you like this.”
Fai stared into the ninja’s eyes in disbelief.
Arashi led the five of them--yes, five, Kurogane would be damned if that stupid manjuu bun ever had another fit like the one he’d just witnessed again--down the hall to a guest room, where she unrolled two futons.
“This is all we have,” she said calmly and bowed in apology, “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” Syaoran said, bowing, “Thank you, Arashi-san.”
They decided that Fai and Sakura would take the beds--tonight had taken the hardest toll on them, and within a few minutes, both of the children and the manjuu had fallen to sleep, Mokona snuggled up in Sakura’s arms. Knowing this, Kurogane allowed himself to stare long and hard at Fai, certain that the mage wasn’t sleeping. Fai never slept on his back. After a few minutes of pretending, at last the mage gave up, and Kurogane simply continued to stare, unspeaking.
He knew he couldn’t force Fai to talk, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t try to help him.
“I suppose you’re going to try to get me to tell you what’s happened,” Fai said quietly, covering his eyes with his arm, “Ne, Kuro-sama?”
“I’m not going to force you to tell me anything,” he said calmly, “but I’m not going to sit here and watch you blame yourself, either.”
Fai laid there in silence for a moment, keeping his eyes covered. After a long moment, he finally spoke again, a heartbroken smile curving his lips, “I can’t tell you what you want to hear, Kuro-sama… I can’t not blame myself for the things that have happened.”
The magician went silent for a moment, and Kurogane could tell that he was trying hard not to let himself break. He waited in patient silence, arms folded as he leaned back against the wall.
“It was nice,” he continued quietly, “to not feel that pain, if only for a while. But… I knew it would come back. Somehow I knew. This pain isn’t the sort you can simply wish away. What’s happened isn’t the sort of thing you can escape from, Kuro-sama. Not for long.” Fai shook his head, “I’m sorry.”
Kurogane sighed, “Idiot. Don’t apologize.”
Leaning over, he peeled Fai’s arm away from his eyes, silently cursing himself when he saw the sorrowful blue eyes that lay beneath.
“I don’t claim to know what happened in your past,” he said, “Hell, I don’t even care what happened in your past. It’s none of my business. But…” Ah, dammit, he was going to sound like a total sap, “It is my business when you’re hurting like this. Because no matter what, we’re all in this together. We have to protect each other and I don’t want to see you like this.”
Fai stared into the ninja’s eyes in disbelief.