Free Willy
ZeldaQueen: Hey, everybody! To those who get announcements on postings to das_sporking, I am very, very sorry about the one that went out not long ago. Posting has not yet resumed. I had meant to submit something to the pending approval list, and it kind of just went straight through. So I'm sorry if I caused any confusion there. To make it up to you all, I thought I'd spork a one-shot by BeatriceTheGolden, a rather infamous fanficcer in the Hetalia fandom, known for her rather...erm, extreme kinks (specifically guro). As the warning tags for this post indicate, we're getting bestiality. More on that with the author's notes, though!
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
Free Willy
Wow this fic brings back a lot of good and bad memories.
ZeldaQueen: I personally don't get what good memories could be associated with this thing, but then again I know YKINMK and all.
It’s actually a roleplay with someone I used to be friends with. tl;dr she hates me now.
ZeldaQueen: Erm, I think you meant "long story short", not "tl;dr".
Also an irl friend was with me when we roleplayed it and gave some of the best ideas, sadly he too hates me now (I sense a pattern here).
ZeldaQueen: Yeeeeeah, I'd imagine that if I got some friends to roleplay whale-fucking with me, our relationships would suffer a bit as well.
Anyways this is some good ol’ Whale/America.
ZeldaQueen: O__o Calling it "good ol'" implies that this is a common thing. I don't want to think that it is, though knowing the internet, I'm sure I'm wrong.
Yes the whale he found in the Japan strips.
ZeldaQueen: Which is a perfectly ordinary whale (physically, that is, I know it's implied to be able to understand humans), so that doesn't explain how a human can have sex with it.
Rating: MA
Warnings: bestiality, whale penis
ZeldaQueen: That's the first time I've ever seen that particular warning, and I sincerely hope it's the last.
Also thank you hetaliafanfictionfiltering because I don’t think I had this saved to my computer and since you guys filtered it I was able to get it back.
ZeldaQueen: Remember, folks, always be sure to back up your whale porn!
America was extremely excited.
ZeldaQueen: Not as much as he was going to be, though! :D *rim shot*
He was visiting Japan’s home which while normally that made him really happy on its own this time Japan had told him that America’s whale friend was at Japan’s house.
ZeldaQueen: He was so excited, he forgot his punctuation!
Immediately upon hearing this America came right over to visit his whale buddy, happy to see him again. When he got to Japan’s house he noticed the other wasn’t there.
ZeldaQueen: I know it's supposed to mean Japan, but "the other" is still kind of awkward.
‘Hmm but be at a meeting or something’
ZeldaQueen: *stares* Beatrice, did you not think to beta this before you re-posted it to the internet? I mean, this is just basic stuff here!
he thought as he walked along the backyard area. Looking around he saw a very large lake-like area and ran for it assuming that’s where his whale would be.
ZeldaQueen: A whale. In a lake. Unless that's a special salt water lake, the whale's not going to be doing very well. And while I know the series was a little ambiguous as to what it meant for one nation to visit another's "house" (sometimes it meant an actual house, sometimes it meant visiting their entire country), I'm pretty sure we saw the whale actually in the ocean.
When he got there he noticed the whale was lying on its back, like it was resting
ZeldaQueen: Which I'm sure wasn't uncomfortable in a man-made lake, which doesn't sound large enough for much movement.
and something very…large was very noticeable on it.
ZeldaQueen: The whale had a tattoo on it. Scandalous!
America blushed upon seeing just how big his whale buddy was ‘down there’.
ZeldaQueen: O___O Okay, maybe it's just me, but if I saw a whale swimming around, the last thing I'd be staring at is its fishy junk. And the fact that the fic keeps emphasizing how the whale's America's "buddy" just makes it worse. I mean, that would be like if you walked in on a friend sunbathing, and stared at their nethers while they were asleep.
Curiously he reached forward and lightly ran his hand along it.
ZeldaQueen: OH MY GOD AMERICA THIS IS NOT A PETTING ZOO! FRIENDS DON'T GROPE FRIENDS, ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY'RE UNCONSCIOUS!
The whale squealed and got on its stomach again.
ZeldaQueen: And promptly knocked America flat, because it's a massive whale that's thrashing around!
It bounced around as it looked up, seeing the American. It jumped on America with joy,
ZeldaQueen: - and squashed him flat. Also, if it's a whale in a lake, how can it jump on someone on land?
happy to see him again, and began to nuzzle his head on the other, accidently rubbing it’s growing erection as well.
ZeldaQueen: I... I have no idea how that works and I have no desire to figure it out. All I'm doing now is figuring that Beatrice is invoking America's super-strength, because there's no way someone could have an entire whale smacking against them and not need a trip to the hospital.
America happily hugged his whale buddy, not caring how wet he got.
ZeldaQueen: Or how flattened. While I suspect Beatrice was implying that America was hugging the whale like he did in the episode, the descriptions of how folks are positioned her makes no sense.
Curiously he looked down again, noticing the whale’s erection.
ZeldaQueen: If the whale was lying flat on its belly, I doubt that's something easily noticed.
“Wow you’re quite big aren’t ya” he said with a nervous laugh.
ZeldaQueen: And now you guys have a new pick-up line, when you awkwardly walk in on your friend! :D I'm sure it won't end with you getting slapped!
Quickly glancing around to make sure no one was around he turned back to the whale and made a rolling motion with his hand. “Could you go on your back again, I uhh, can help you out with your big problem down there” he said, glancing around again.
ZeldaQueen: I guess it would be pretty difficult to masturbate with only flippers. Pretty presumptuous of you, though, America.
And if anyone has Brain Bleach on hand, now's a good time to break it out.
The whale squeaked in excitement and rolled on his back, showing its huge erection to the American.
ZeldaQueen: I'm pretty sure he's seen it already, whale. He's been talking about nothing else, this whole time.
America gulped as he hesitantly reached forward and brushed the whale’s erection again. He could feel his pants tightening as his cock started getting hard.
ZeldaQueen: Oh my God, I did not need to know that America gets turned on by sea life. >_<
“I-I’m gonna get on ya okay” he told the whale, crawling onto its belly. His eyes widened seeing just how big it was.
ZeldaQueen: Did he not see that from where he was on land?
Also, when I was reading through this with a friend, in preparation for a project (not making this up, guys), he actually looked up how huge a whale's dork is. I can't remember what he said and I refuse to look it up again, but I do know it was large enough that America should not be able to manage what he's going to be pulling off.
Slowly he leaned down and licked the head, waiting for a reaction.
ZeldaQueen: It's a fish-flavored Popsicle, to borrow some Fifty Shades of Grey narm!
The whale started to squeal in enjoyment and moved around.
ZeldaQueen: In the process, America was flung all the way to Hokkaido.
Its erection twitched slightly from the touches.
ZeldaQueen: I'm getting horrific flashbacks to those appendages Link needs to hit with the boomerang and jump on, in Jabu-Jabu's belly. I don't think I'll ever play that level again.
On another note, is it just me, or is describing an erection as "twitching" basically instant narm? I can not take a sex scene seriously with that happening.
Seeing this made the whale happy America grabbed it’s erection and put the head in his mouth,
ZeldaQueen: Jesus Christ! O_o I think America's been taking lessons from Kirby, because HE FIT A WHALE'S DORK IN HIS MOUTH, BEATRICE, DO YOU KNOW HOW MASSIVE THAT IS?!?
sucking a bit before moving his head to take in more, not able to get much in.
ZeldaQueen: HOW'S HE GETTING ANY IN AT ALL, I DON'T EVEN! *FLAILS*
The whale squeaked even more, thrusting its bottom with anticipation as it felt tight with America’s small mouth.
ZeldaQueen: Is America super-glued onto that thing? Because there's no way he should not be flying to kingdom come.
America gagged a bit but kept on going, using one hand to stroke part of the cock he couldn’t get in his mouth.
ZeldaQueen: Read - most of it.
He slowly dragged his tongue along the underside before putting it in his mouth again.
ZeldaQueen: But wasn't it already in his mouth? I... ugh...
Feeling tight in his pants he reached down and took his own cock out, stroking it quickly.
ZeldaQueen: I'm now imagining America dropping his pants and wanking in a five-second timeframe, while still hanging off of the whale's dork by his mouth.
The whale began to bounce with pleasure as precum began to leak from its head.
ZeldaQueen: IS IT OR IS IT NOT STILL IN AMERICA'S MOUTH? D: HOW IS HE NOT CHOKING TO DEATH? WHY DID SOMEONE THINK THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?
He continued to rub around, rubbing against America’s freed erection.
ZeldaQueen: Considering how much smaller America is, I doubt the whale could even notice it.
America’s mouth felt full, feeling as if it was going to burst.
ZeldaQueen: YOU DON'T SAY???
Choking a bit he took the whale’s erection out of his mouth as he got around, rubbing himself against the whale’s erection as he went back to licking the tip.
ZeldaQueen: July and Christmas, America, IT'S A WHALE'S DICK, NOT A BODY PILLOW! It probably smells like low tide and is all slimy and.... ack! ACK! GIMME BRAIN BLEACH!
The whale couldn’t take it much more, spilling his seed all over America. Continuing to rub on America, getting out every bit of cum it had left
ZeldaQueen: *tiredly* I suppose we should be grateful there was never a creepy interspecies mpreg sequel to this.
America gagged as he swallowed what cum he could, feeling some come out his nose from the force of it.
ZeldaQueen: Okay, now I'm just laughing. That's the most insane thing I've read in a sex scene, except perhaps for Gethy's harlequin tentacles.
Coughing a bit and wiping his nose and seeing some blood on his hand.
ZeldaQueen: Hello, fragment! And I should think there'd be a lot of blood, considering how much should have been coming out of his nose and...ugh.
He patted the whale on the belly reassuringly, thinking of what it would feel like inside him.
ZeldaQueen: Imagine, the erotic story of Jonah and the Whale!
He took his pants off, using the whale’s cum as lube as he started fingering himself,
ZeldaQueen: He needs lube to finger himself?
licking the whale again to make him hard.
ZeldaQueen: America, I don't want to know what you lick to get hard!
The whale began squealing again, sounding almost like a man,
ZeldaQueen: *vomits*
and rubbed on America’s tongue.
ZeldaQueen: At this point, I'm starting to wonder if America just has one massive tongue.
It started to get hard once more as it squeaked, liking the attention it was getting.
ZeldaQueen: I highly doubt this is a conventional way to reward a pet with attention. *still feels ill*
America put another finger inside himself,
ZeldaQueen: ...He already had one in there? I have no clue what he's doing, at this point!
moaning as he continued licking up and down the whale’s cock.
ZeldaQueen: At this rate, he should finish by next week.
He continued stretching himself, moaning at the slight pain it gave him.
ZeldaQueen: Considering he's shoving a WHALE'S DORK in his mouth, I think "slight pain" is a bit of an understatement, here.
Feeling as he was thoroughly prepared
ZeldaQueen: I...really don't think anything can have you prepared for fucking a whale.
he got on his hands and knees in front of the whale’s cock, using cum again as lube, he pushed himself onto the giant cock, groaning as the head went in,
ZeldaQueen: I now have this image of America being stuck on there like some acid trip-inspired weathervane from Hell and... oh God, I think I need a rest.
The whale looked as America prepared himself, confused at what he was doing.
ZeldaQueen: Now granted, if I was a whale, I'd imagine the idea of a human fucking me would be a bit confusing. Given how much build-up America's been devoting to this, though, the whale seems a tad clueless.
Feeling good inside the other, he squealed, thrusting upwards and managing to push in further.
ZeldaQueen: Okay, at this point America should be split in half. What the fuck?
America screamed at searing pain ran through him, pushing himself off the whale’s cock, breathing deeply.
ZeldaQueen: So apparently it's fine to shove a whale's bratwurst up your ass as long as you're doing it slowly, but when there's actual thrusting involved, it hurts. That's...uh, good to know.
“Hey big guy don’t be so rough okay” he said, patting the whale’s tummy.
ZeldaQueen: *flatly* "Tummy". That's about as far from sexy as you can get, you know. It reminds me of A Nintendo Fan's Lust, and how the characters keep "scooting" from one to another.
Slowly he grabbed the whale’s cock again and put the tip in, pushing down a little.
ZeldaQueen: That must be really awkward, considering it'd be like shoving an oak tree in there with just two hands.
Tears ran down America’s face from being stretched so far but he was determined.
ZeldaQueen: That's friendly dedication for you, shoving a giant schlong in your anus!
Slowly he pushed himself back up before going back, setting a rhythm.
ZeldaQueen: I'd imagine it was a waltz. Perhaps "The Blue Danube"?
“Oh, whale, you’re so big” he said to his friend as he reached down and began stroking himself.
ZeldaQueen: Uh... understatement of the century there, America.
The whale continued to thrash around, trying not to thrust inside America.
ZeldaQueen: It's a damned whale. Even if it wasn't thrusting, the fat that it's thrashing around should have America getting major injuries!
It squeaked as he felt America thrusting in rhythm now, feeling itself about to come.
ZeldaQueen: I, meanwhile, am about to go. Specifically, I'm going to go to the exact opposite side of the Earth BeatriceTheGolden is at, because this is creepy to the max!
A few more thrusts brought America to orgasm as he continued impaling himself on the whale.
ZeldaQueen: There has got to be some way to work a Captain Ahab joke in here...
Not wanting the whale to come inside him he got off and turned around to again lick the head of the whale’s cock as his hands stroked it.
ZeldaQueen: Okay, I can understand the first part of that, but if he knew the whale was going to...uh, go off soon, why would he stick his face right into - oh fuck it, why am I even asking this sort of thing?
It didn’t take long for the whale to finally cum once more. Again spilling semen all over America’s face.
ZeldaQueen: And stunning him into narrating in fragments. Also, Beatrice missed a prime spot to include the cry, "THAR HE BLOWS!"
America wiped at his face which was now drenched in the whale’s cum.
ZeldaQueen: Yeeeeeah, I'm thinking a lot of towels would be needed to deal with that.
Getting off of it
ZeldaQueen: I thought he was getting off on this! *rim shot*
he motioned for it to turn over
ZeldaQueen: Okay, is it just me, or has Beatrice been inconsistently referring to the whale as "it" and "he"? Which is it, dammit?
as he leaned across and gave it a kiss on its head.
ZeldaQueen: Dare I ask which head that's referring to?
‘Now I need to quickly get cleaned up before Japan gets back” he thought to himself as he gathered his clothing.
ZeldaQueen: Considering he only took off his pants (and, I'd presume, his underpants), how much clothing does he need to gether? Or did that last part blow more of his clothes off than we heard?
Meanwhile the whale got back inside the water, bouncing around the waters again.
ZeldaQueen: Wait, this was going on on land? How did they even manage to...the whale was on the ground and it's heavy, I...didn't the whale get dried up or... AH, LOGIC, WHERE DID YOU GOOOO?
Meanwhile, Japan clicked on his camera, stopping the footage he was recording. He chuckled to himself, walking back into his house.
ZeldaQueen: ... Was Japan really just sitting there, in the off chance his friend would decide to fuck the whale? Or is he just always on the prowl for interesting porn tape opportunities?
You know what? Screw it. This is over, and I'm glad! Have a good day, ladies and gentlemen. I think I need to go lie down for a good long while, now.
Return to the Sporking Chamber
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
Free Willy
Wow this fic brings back a lot of good and bad memories.
ZeldaQueen: I personally don't get what good memories could be associated with this thing, but then again I know YKINMK and all.
It’s actually a roleplay with someone I used to be friends with. tl;dr she hates me now.
ZeldaQueen: Erm, I think you meant "long story short", not "tl;dr".
Also an irl friend was with me when we roleplayed it and gave some of the best ideas, sadly he too hates me now (I sense a pattern here).
ZeldaQueen: Yeeeeeah, I'd imagine that if I got some friends to roleplay whale-fucking with me, our relationships would suffer a bit as well.
Anyways this is some good ol’ Whale/America.
ZeldaQueen: O__o Calling it "good ol'" implies that this is a common thing. I don't want to think that it is, though knowing the internet, I'm sure I'm wrong.
Yes the whale he found in the Japan strips.
ZeldaQueen: Which is a perfectly ordinary whale (physically, that is, I know it's implied to be able to understand humans), so that doesn't explain how a human can have sex with it.
Rating: MA
Warnings: bestiality, whale penis
ZeldaQueen: That's the first time I've ever seen that particular warning, and I sincerely hope it's the last.
Also thank you hetaliafanfictionfiltering because I don’t think I had this saved to my computer and since you guys filtered it I was able to get it back.
ZeldaQueen: Remember, folks, always be sure to back up your whale porn!
America was extremely excited.
ZeldaQueen: Not as much as he was going to be, though! :D *rim shot*
He was visiting Japan’s home which while normally that made him really happy on its own this time Japan had told him that America’s whale friend was at Japan’s house.
ZeldaQueen: He was so excited, he forgot his punctuation!
Immediately upon hearing this America came right over to visit his whale buddy, happy to see him again. When he got to Japan’s house he noticed the other wasn’t there.
ZeldaQueen: I know it's supposed to mean Japan, but "the other" is still kind of awkward.
‘Hmm but be at a meeting or something’
ZeldaQueen: *stares* Beatrice, did you not think to beta this before you re-posted it to the internet? I mean, this is just basic stuff here!
he thought as he walked along the backyard area. Looking around he saw a very large lake-like area and ran for it assuming that’s where his whale would be.
ZeldaQueen: A whale. In a lake. Unless that's a special salt water lake, the whale's not going to be doing very well. And while I know the series was a little ambiguous as to what it meant for one nation to visit another's "house" (sometimes it meant an actual house, sometimes it meant visiting their entire country), I'm pretty sure we saw the whale actually in the ocean.
When he got there he noticed the whale was lying on its back, like it was resting
ZeldaQueen: Which I'm sure wasn't uncomfortable in a man-made lake, which doesn't sound large enough for much movement.
and something very…large was very noticeable on it.
ZeldaQueen: The whale had a tattoo on it. Scandalous!
America blushed upon seeing just how big his whale buddy was ‘down there’.
ZeldaQueen: O___O Okay, maybe it's just me, but if I saw a whale swimming around, the last thing I'd be staring at is its fishy junk. And the fact that the fic keeps emphasizing how the whale's America's "buddy" just makes it worse. I mean, that would be like if you walked in on a friend sunbathing, and stared at their nethers while they were asleep.
Curiously he reached forward and lightly ran his hand along it.
ZeldaQueen: OH MY GOD AMERICA THIS IS NOT A PETTING ZOO! FRIENDS DON'T GROPE FRIENDS, ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY'RE UNCONSCIOUS!
The whale squealed and got on its stomach again.
ZeldaQueen: And promptly knocked America flat, because it's a massive whale that's thrashing around!
It bounced around as it looked up, seeing the American. It jumped on America with joy,
ZeldaQueen: - and squashed him flat. Also, if it's a whale in a lake, how can it jump on someone on land?
happy to see him again, and began to nuzzle his head on the other, accidently rubbing it’s growing erection as well.
ZeldaQueen: I... I have no idea how that works and I have no desire to figure it out. All I'm doing now is figuring that Beatrice is invoking America's super-strength, because there's no way someone could have an entire whale smacking against them and not need a trip to the hospital.
America happily hugged his whale buddy, not caring how wet he got.
ZeldaQueen: Or how flattened. While I suspect Beatrice was implying that America was hugging the whale like he did in the episode, the descriptions of how folks are positioned her makes no sense.
Curiously he looked down again, noticing the whale’s erection.
ZeldaQueen: If the whale was lying flat on its belly, I doubt that's something easily noticed.
“Wow you’re quite big aren’t ya” he said with a nervous laugh.
ZeldaQueen: And now you guys have a new pick-up line, when you awkwardly walk in on your friend! :D I'm sure it won't end with you getting slapped!
Quickly glancing around to make sure no one was around he turned back to the whale and made a rolling motion with his hand. “Could you go on your back again, I uhh, can help you out with your big problem down there” he said, glancing around again.
ZeldaQueen: I guess it would be pretty difficult to masturbate with only flippers. Pretty presumptuous of you, though, America.
And if anyone has Brain Bleach on hand, now's a good time to break it out.
The whale squeaked in excitement and rolled on his back, showing its huge erection to the American.
ZeldaQueen: I'm pretty sure he's seen it already, whale. He's been talking about nothing else, this whole time.
America gulped as he hesitantly reached forward and brushed the whale’s erection again. He could feel his pants tightening as his cock started getting hard.
ZeldaQueen: Oh my God, I did not need to know that America gets turned on by sea life. >_<
“I-I’m gonna get on ya okay” he told the whale, crawling onto its belly. His eyes widened seeing just how big it was.
ZeldaQueen: Did he not see that from where he was on land?
Also, when I was reading through this with a friend, in preparation for a project (not making this up, guys), he actually looked up how huge a whale's dork is. I can't remember what he said and I refuse to look it up again, but I do know it was large enough that America should not be able to manage what he's going to be pulling off.
Slowly he leaned down and licked the head, waiting for a reaction.
ZeldaQueen: It's a fish-flavored Popsicle, to borrow some Fifty Shades of Grey narm!
The whale started to squeal in enjoyment and moved around.
ZeldaQueen: In the process, America was flung all the way to Hokkaido.
Its erection twitched slightly from the touches.
ZeldaQueen: I'm getting horrific flashbacks to those appendages Link needs to hit with the boomerang and jump on, in Jabu-Jabu's belly. I don't think I'll ever play that level again.
On another note, is it just me, or is describing an erection as "twitching" basically instant narm? I can not take a sex scene seriously with that happening.
Seeing this made the whale happy America grabbed it’s erection and put the head in his mouth,
ZeldaQueen: Jesus Christ! O_o I think America's been taking lessons from Kirby, because HE FIT A WHALE'S DORK IN HIS MOUTH, BEATRICE, DO YOU KNOW HOW MASSIVE THAT IS?!?
sucking a bit before moving his head to take in more, not able to get much in.
ZeldaQueen: HOW'S HE GETTING ANY IN AT ALL, I DON'T EVEN! *FLAILS*
The whale squeaked even more, thrusting its bottom with anticipation as it felt tight with America’s small mouth.
ZeldaQueen: Is America super-glued onto that thing? Because there's no way he should not be flying to kingdom come.
America gagged a bit but kept on going, using one hand to stroke part of the cock he couldn’t get in his mouth.
ZeldaQueen: Read - most of it.
He slowly dragged his tongue along the underside before putting it in his mouth again.
ZeldaQueen: But wasn't it already in his mouth? I... ugh...
Feeling tight in his pants he reached down and took his own cock out, stroking it quickly.
ZeldaQueen: I'm now imagining America dropping his pants and wanking in a five-second timeframe, while still hanging off of the whale's dork by his mouth.
The whale began to bounce with pleasure as precum began to leak from its head.
ZeldaQueen: IS IT OR IS IT NOT STILL IN AMERICA'S MOUTH? D: HOW IS HE NOT CHOKING TO DEATH? WHY DID SOMEONE THINK THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?
He continued to rub around, rubbing against America’s freed erection.
ZeldaQueen: Considering how much smaller America is, I doubt the whale could even notice it.
America’s mouth felt full, feeling as if it was going to burst.
ZeldaQueen: YOU DON'T SAY???
Choking a bit he took the whale’s erection out of his mouth as he got around, rubbing himself against the whale’s erection as he went back to licking the tip.
ZeldaQueen: July and Christmas, America, IT'S A WHALE'S DICK, NOT A BODY PILLOW! It probably smells like low tide and is all slimy and.... ack! ACK! GIMME BRAIN BLEACH!
The whale couldn’t take it much more, spilling his seed all over America. Continuing to rub on America, getting out every bit of cum it had left
ZeldaQueen: *tiredly* I suppose we should be grateful there was never a creepy interspecies mpreg sequel to this.
America gagged as he swallowed what cum he could, feeling some come out his nose from the force of it.
ZeldaQueen: Okay, now I'm just laughing. That's the most insane thing I've read in a sex scene, except perhaps for Gethy's harlequin tentacles.
Coughing a bit and wiping his nose and seeing some blood on his hand.
ZeldaQueen: Hello, fragment! And I should think there'd be a lot of blood, considering how much should have been coming out of his nose and...ugh.
He patted the whale on the belly reassuringly, thinking of what it would feel like inside him.
ZeldaQueen: Imagine, the erotic story of Jonah and the Whale!
He took his pants off, using the whale’s cum as lube as he started fingering himself,
ZeldaQueen: He needs lube to finger himself?
licking the whale again to make him hard.
ZeldaQueen: America, I don't want to know what you lick to get hard!
The whale began squealing again, sounding almost like a man,
ZeldaQueen: *vomits*
and rubbed on America’s tongue.
ZeldaQueen: At this point, I'm starting to wonder if America just has one massive tongue.
It started to get hard once more as it squeaked, liking the attention it was getting.
ZeldaQueen: I highly doubt this is a conventional way to reward a pet with attention. *still feels ill*
America put another finger inside himself,
ZeldaQueen: ...He already had one in there? I have no clue what he's doing, at this point!
moaning as he continued licking up and down the whale’s cock.
ZeldaQueen: At this rate, he should finish by next week.
He continued stretching himself, moaning at the slight pain it gave him.
ZeldaQueen: Considering he's shoving a WHALE'S DORK in his mouth, I think "slight pain" is a bit of an understatement, here.
Feeling as he was thoroughly prepared
ZeldaQueen: I...really don't think anything can have you prepared for fucking a whale.
he got on his hands and knees in front of the whale’s cock, using cum again as lube, he pushed himself onto the giant cock, groaning as the head went in,
ZeldaQueen: I now have this image of America being stuck on there like some acid trip-inspired weathervane from Hell and... oh God, I think I need a rest.
The whale looked as America prepared himself, confused at what he was doing.
ZeldaQueen: Now granted, if I was a whale, I'd imagine the idea of a human fucking me would be a bit confusing. Given how much build-up America's been devoting to this, though, the whale seems a tad clueless.
Feeling good inside the other, he squealed, thrusting upwards and managing to push in further.
ZeldaQueen: Okay, at this point America should be split in half. What the fuck?
America screamed at searing pain ran through him, pushing himself off the whale’s cock, breathing deeply.
ZeldaQueen: So apparently it's fine to shove a whale's bratwurst up your ass as long as you're doing it slowly, but when there's actual thrusting involved, it hurts. That's...uh, good to know.
“Hey big guy don’t be so rough okay” he said, patting the whale’s tummy.
ZeldaQueen: *flatly* "Tummy". That's about as far from sexy as you can get, you know. It reminds me of A Nintendo Fan's Lust, and how the characters keep "scooting" from one to another.
Slowly he grabbed the whale’s cock again and put the tip in, pushing down a little.
ZeldaQueen: That must be really awkward, considering it'd be like shoving an oak tree in there with just two hands.
Tears ran down America’s face from being stretched so far but he was determined.
ZeldaQueen: That's friendly dedication for you, shoving a giant schlong in your anus!
Slowly he pushed himself back up before going back, setting a rhythm.
ZeldaQueen: I'd imagine it was a waltz. Perhaps "The Blue Danube"?
“Oh, whale, you’re so big” he said to his friend as he reached down and began stroking himself.
ZeldaQueen: Uh... understatement of the century there, America.
The whale continued to thrash around, trying not to thrust inside America.
ZeldaQueen: It's a damned whale. Even if it wasn't thrusting, the fat that it's thrashing around should have America getting major injuries!
It squeaked as he felt America thrusting in rhythm now, feeling itself about to come.
ZeldaQueen: I, meanwhile, am about to go. Specifically, I'm going to go to the exact opposite side of the Earth BeatriceTheGolden is at, because this is creepy to the max!
A few more thrusts brought America to orgasm as he continued impaling himself on the whale.
ZeldaQueen: There has got to be some way to work a Captain Ahab joke in here...
Not wanting the whale to come inside him he got off and turned around to again lick the head of the whale’s cock as his hands stroked it.
ZeldaQueen: Okay, I can understand the first part of that, but if he knew the whale was going to...uh, go off soon, why would he stick his face right into - oh fuck it, why am I even asking this sort of thing?
It didn’t take long for the whale to finally cum once more. Again spilling semen all over America’s face.
ZeldaQueen: And stunning him into narrating in fragments. Also, Beatrice missed a prime spot to include the cry, "THAR HE BLOWS!"
America wiped at his face which was now drenched in the whale’s cum.
ZeldaQueen: Yeeeeeah, I'm thinking a lot of towels would be needed to deal with that.
Getting off of it
ZeldaQueen: I thought he was getting off on this! *rim shot*
he motioned for it to turn over
ZeldaQueen: Okay, is it just me, or has Beatrice been inconsistently referring to the whale as "it" and "he"? Which is it, dammit?
as he leaned across and gave it a kiss on its head.
ZeldaQueen: Dare I ask which head that's referring to?
‘Now I need to quickly get cleaned up before Japan gets back” he thought to himself as he gathered his clothing.
ZeldaQueen: Considering he only took off his pants (and, I'd presume, his underpants), how much clothing does he need to gether? Or did that last part blow more of his clothes off than we heard?
Meanwhile the whale got back inside the water, bouncing around the waters again.
ZeldaQueen: Wait, this was going on on land? How did they even manage to...the whale was on the ground and it's heavy, I...didn't the whale get dried up or... AH, LOGIC, WHERE DID YOU GOOOO?
Meanwhile, Japan clicked on his camera, stopping the footage he was recording. He chuckled to himself, walking back into his house.
ZeldaQueen: ... Was Japan really just sitting there, in the off chance his friend would decide to fuck the whale? Or is he just always on the prowl for interesting porn tape opportunities?
You know what? Screw it. This is over, and I'm glad! Have a good day, ladies and gentlemen. I think I need to go lie down for a good long while, now.
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