Breaking Dawn: Chapter 23 - Memories

[zelda_queen]

ZeldaQueen: Right then, we've met the Sue spawn so onward and outward, right?

Projection Room Voices: Right. "Chapter twenty-three, in which more of Bella's Sue-ness is touched upon, along with the Sue-ness of her daughter".

Comments

[darkslover]

*sigh* This is the first of Belmeyer's wanking. For five or so more chapters, there is nothing but glorifying the Cullens and vampirism in general. I know Belmeyer had a great time masturbating over those chapters...

And in the next there is that one line I despise with all my being: making vampires fairy-tale creatures. As a vampire fan, I screamed. Really, I did.

Sorry, for getting ahead of myself, but this part below brought me rage of unfathomable depths.

It was a place where anyone could believe magic existed. A place where you just expected Snow White to walk right in with her apple in hand, or a unicorn to stop and nibble at the rosebushes.

Edward had always thought that he belonged to the world of horror stories. Of course, I’d known he was dead wrong. It was obvious that he belonged here. In a fairy tale.

And now I was in the story with him.

OF COURSE! VAMPIRES ARE NOT CREATURES OF HORROR! OF COURSE!I wish I could make Meyer sit down and watch some Hellsing and its protagonist, Alucard. *points at avatar* It would

[zelda_queen]

Now see, that line just nearly rotted my brain because of the sheer amount of sugary sweetness in it, but yeah. Even if there are good vampires in a story (like "Vampire High" or "Cirque De Freak") the stories are still gritty or dark to at least some extent.

I...don't think Meyer likes traditional vampires. Which begs the question of WHY she used them in her freaking novels! I mean, I know her dream said the dude was one, but couldn't she have made them vampire-like creatures or something?

[aikaterini]

See, I admit that I'm a sucker for the romanticized vampires, the ones who are good-looking, charming, etc

[zelda_queen]

Indeed! And at the end of the day, the blood-drinking is pretty much the *only* thing these creatures have that connects them to the concept of "vampire". Plus, it's just another example of Bella being a moron "Oh, Edward's so pretty, he just *can't* be a creature from a horror story! Nope, he's got to be from a happy land of unicorns and bunnies!"

"I doubt that you'd find many people who'd refer to it as a fluffy little animal that they'd love to cuddle and prance around with in a fairy-tale setting."

Actually, I did for awhile when I was a kid. ^^;;; But then, that was after I got the Beanie Baby of it...

[aikaterini]

Ooh, I used to have Beanie Babies when I was younger! They were so popular...gee, now I can't remember when the fad began to die down.

Do you mean just the bat Beanie Baby or the vampire bat? Because fruit bats *are* cute; they're often referred to as "flying foxes" because of their faces. However, vampire bats and insect-eating bats aren't as attractive (and are often considered - dare I say it? - ugly).

Don't get me wrong, I think that fruit bats are cute and that bats in general are cool and awesome. ^^ It's just that they usually don't appear in the magical world that Bella is describing. Usually, they do feature in horror stories.

[zelda_queen]

Ah, Beanie Babies! A staple of my childhood, along with the Tamagotchi, Pokemon (first generation), Pogs, Furbies... *gets nostalgic*

I think it the fruit bat actually. And really, that's about as much as I've looked at bats. My zoo has them, but their room is really dark of course and I haven't gone in there since they put the tarantula exhibit in also...

I get what you're saying though, Bella's going off on a Walt Disney-type cutsey vision which Edward most definitely doesn't fit. And the worst part is, the only reason she is thinking this is because he's all sparkly. Like "Oh, he can't be bad! He's too pretty!".

[kawaiicow]

It was a place where anyone could believe magic existed. A place where you just expected Snow White to walk right in with her apple in hand, or a unicorn to stop and nibble at the rosebushes.

Edward had always thought that he belonged to the world of horror stories. Of course, I’d known he was dead wrong. It was obvious that he belonged here. In a fairy tale.

And now I was in the story with him.

huhuhuhuhuhwAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Oh god, did she really write this? Vampires and unicorns with no irony or fantasy element? In a fairy tale? Is this woman aware of what she is writing? I thought the sparkles just had no point, but to put Eddy on par with fairies? Was that really the point? I'm speaking with inflections? I'm so...I don't even know what to call this mixture of emotions? Question mark?
Now my brain is working agin properly I can continue laughing with mirth and vomiting as the horror fan in me digests that cyanide tablet she took.