Most Wretched
I feel *wretched*.
I'm cranky and grumpy and walking around unhappy all the time.
It's a good thing there are people around. Ben and Fanny were the sources of many hugs tonight which kept me sane while I followed them around Chinatown.
Lately I just want to cry and collapse on someone, even just a little while, before getting up again and putting my pieces back together in a different sort of weariness. Because there are major BATTORUs that need to be fought before the semester ends, but my head wont stop hurting. At least Im seeing my doctor Wednesday. The fact that my face keeps being really pale or really flushed is probably not good. My face is far pinker right now than it should be.
I spent all weekend listening to "Houki Boshi" and that sort of lifted my spirits, as did phone support from people (which was limited because talking hurt >.>)...but still, I just cant stop feeling like absolute crap. And sleeping 18 hours a day to avoid existance is not an option, unfotunately.
Honestly I feel like some sort of shivering shaking wild thing; what I really need is to be repeatedly petted and told that everything is going to be okay. Because it is. I just need someone to tell me that and give me a big hug and let me take a nap on them. But for now, I'll just have to settle for my lonely bed in my blessedly dark dark room.
Somebody help me through this nightmare
I can't control myself
I'm cranky and grumpy and walking around unhappy all the time.
It's a good thing there are people around. Ben and Fanny were the sources of many hugs tonight which kept me sane while I followed them around Chinatown.
Lately I just want to cry and collapse on someone, even just a little while, before getting up again and putting my pieces back together in a different sort of weariness. Because there are major BATTORUs that need to be fought before the semester ends, but my head wont stop hurting. At least Im seeing my doctor Wednesday. The fact that my face keeps being really pale or really flushed is probably not good. My face is far pinker right now than it should be.
I spent all weekend listening to "Houki Boshi" and that sort of lifted my spirits, as did phone support from people (which was limited because talking hurt >.>)...but still, I just cant stop feeling like absolute crap. And sleeping 18 hours a day to avoid existance is not an option, unfotunately.
Honestly I feel like some sort of shivering shaking wild thing; what I really need is to be repeatedly petted and told that everything is going to be okay. Because it is. I just need someone to tell me that and give me a big hug and let me take a nap on them. But for now, I'll just have to settle for my lonely bed in my blessedly dark dark room.
Somebody help me through this nightmare
I can't control myself