(no subject)
i feel productive
i feel good
there are so many reasons for me to be happy
when you finally face your problems, and when you realize that you have people who understand, who want to help, and will be there... it's just such a relief
MY particular issue is i dont know what im doing. im pretty lost, i know i'm just playing a lot by ear. i know that i also have this preconcieved idea of what i want to be, but i'm not fitting into that, and it's exasperating, and frustrating, and hard to accept. but i'm starting to, or trying to at least. for me the first step in forgetting what i think i need to be is going to be about letting go of how much i care about what other people think of me. i've lost friends who i care about deeply, and i still don't COMPLETELY know why, but because of that i've started to try to make myself a certain way for certain people, so that i can be the friend that THEY want to be friends with. that needs to stop. it's hard.
knowing all of this about myself is freeing
i feel good
there are so many reasons for me to be happy
when you finally face your problems, and when you realize that you have people who understand, who want to help, and will be there... it's just such a relief
MY particular issue is i dont know what im doing. im pretty lost, i know i'm just playing a lot by ear. i know that i also have this preconcieved idea of what i want to be, but i'm not fitting into that, and it's exasperating, and frustrating, and hard to accept. but i'm starting to, or trying to at least. for me the first step in forgetting what i think i need to be is going to be about letting go of how much i care about what other people think of me. i've lost friends who i care about deeply, and i still don't COMPLETELY know why, but because of that i've started to try to make myself a certain way for certain people, so that i can be the friend that THEY want to be friends with. that needs to stop. it's hard.
knowing all of this about myself is freeing