planting flowers
So I was talking to my therapist this morning and this comic came up, and the more I think about it the more I like it. Flowers I am planting for the new year:
- Hosting a get-together at my place with old friends
- Taking my new meds which I think are doing a lot for my mood
- Asking "What would I be doing if I were happy?" and doing that even if it doesn't sound as exciting as it ought to (ex: reading library books at the cafe for lunch; dressing up occasionally)
- Cutting down on regularly scheduled/ongoing commitments that I feel guilty about opting out of, in favor of activities I can opt into at will depending on how things are going
- Scheduling a massage to try to convince my body that lots of the stress that's accumulated over the last few years is no longer necessary
- paying other people to make food and/or bring it to me when I need to
- making concrete plans with people all the way up the chain of command to get away from project management at work, which I'm more certain than ever is bad for me - not only is it something that doesn't come naturally to me and really taxes my executive function to the limit, but it also involves a lot of my ability to move forward depending on other people, and I need to do more solo work for a while so I'm depending more on myself and doing something I'm good at to increase my sense of agency and self-confidence.
- Having enough things in order that I can start to think about dating again, which has the potential to lead to cuddling
We'll see what grows this year, but I'm optimistic.