Sleeping Less Makes Me Grumpy
Alex posted a comic about Batman getting his head bashed in by Superman, so I was going to comment with my shocked smiley face (
), but I found out that Alex banned me from making comments in his journal. Alex, you bitch! Are people suddenly hating me again or something? I never got the memo.
Nick and I ran into Ryan and Alissa today at Pick N' Save. I could barely think of anything more to say than "Hi," so our conversation went by fast. Sheesh, I still need to work on my social skills. And I've been making a big deal lately on how much I miss Alissa and Therese. You think I would have given her a hug or something if I miss seeing her so much. I planned on sending them random e-card thingies, but I'm too sleepy at the moment to pick one out and stuff.
I received a lot of online messages from people I haven't talked to in forever, most notably Marivel, Jennifer, Ledvia, Edith, and Denny. Today must be "Let's instant message JR because I haven't talked to him in months" day. Funny how these things seem to happen all at once, huh?
I'm not doing so well in my Engineering Economy class. And it makes me feel worse that Michael (MSU Michael) described it as some easy math class. I guess it'd be easy if I had more time in the day to devote to studying, but I work, and I'm in clubs, and I tutor friends when they need help. But my grade on my midterm makes me want to isolate myself to a closed room and work, work, work, and study, study, study. I guess I'll forever be stuck with "I must make perfect grades" syndrome. I try to get myself not to care about grades so much, but then I get people telling me, "Keep up that GPA, JR! You know you can do even better!"
I think I'm already enough of a workaholic. Maybe I don't work at an insane amount of hours at a job to earn a crapload of money like Nemo, but I think I've made several social sacrifices over the years just so I can devote myself to school. By the time I'm done with school, my friends aren't going to be grouped around me like they are now. My Mississippi and Wisconsin friends will all disperse, and I'll wish that I had hung out with them more. Heh, and it'd be nice if I could actually talk to some of my friends, rather than having them send me a one- or two-word message on Myspace or Facebook. It's even sillier when some of them live just a few floors above or below me. Even instant messaging is better than leaving an obscure message on a social website, hoping that I'll eventually read it when I eventually log on to that website. Why are people so addicted to the popularity of those websites? Popularity's a fickle concept, but I'll follow along if it'll get a few friends to communicate with me.
It's again that bias thing that gets in my way. If I acted like everyone else, people would talk to me more. I can't even get some friends in college whom I've known for three years to let me eat lunch with them. I really do want to become good friends with people, and this time, I don't think it's my fault for these friendships not blossoming. My anxiety doesn't make me hold back anymore; I'll go up and talk to you. But if you don't let me in, if you don't listen to me or talk back, how are we going to be anything more than classmates or acquiantances?
"Wow, JR, you're funny," said Liz last year, after watching The Skeleton Key with a group of friends. "We should hang out more."
I wish more people could see that. I'd appreciate it if my quest to form closer bonds with my friends in college wasn't one-sided.
The Japanese versions of the Little Mermaid sing-alongs on Kingdom Hearts II are so cool. It'd be so awesome if I learned how to sing "Under the Sea" or "Part of Your World" in Japanese. Translated Japanese lyrics that I could read and pronounce are hard to come by, though.
I don't think anyone cares anymore, but just in case you forgot, I have a website. I redesigned it using themes I downloaded. I figure that I must suck as a graphics designer, so I'll go ahead and use layouts and themes from people who actually know how to make websites look good. I still don't know what kinds of things I should talk about on my website or what topics I should have in my forums, but the worst part is that nobody gives me any suggestions on what they want, and then nobody goes to my website because they don't like what's on my website (or don't like that there's not really anything on my website at all). I think I've already given up on suggestions, though. Whenever I can get around to it, I'll start advertising it and see where it goes from there. I just hope I don't run into the same people I came across during my old days of web development. I still have a dozen or so emails and messages from people telling me how much they hate me and my websites.
I have a website. I have a cellphone. I have a dorm room phone. I'm on Facebook. I'm on MySpace. I use AIM. I use ICQ. I use MSN. I use Yahoo. I use GTalk. I use LiveJournal. I use JournalSpace. I have a Wikipedia account. I have a SlashDot account. I have 30 different email addresses. (If you pick a random website and send an email to zarjay@website.com, you'd probably be emailing me.) My weekly schedule is posted online and on my door. I have a window; you can even send a carrier pigeon if you have to. It's unbelievable that some people find it too difficult to keep in touch with me. You can basically find out everything about me, the websites I've been to, and my contact information, all by Googling "Zarjay" or "JR Shampang." I make myself widely available on purpose. No one has an excuse for not being able to keep in touch with me.
So college keeps me busy all the time, and I don't always have time for the friends who contact me, but I do enjoy the interruptions from familiar faces and voices. It keeps me sane and less inclined to become a hardcore robot who does nothing but schoolwork all day. While I can't stop myself from wanting to do everything in my power to make good grades (which includes shutting myself off from people sometimes), I can try to get people to bug me more. It'd also be nice if I had more friends to hang out with when I have some free time.
Seriously, I stay up late way too much.
), but I found out that Alex banned me from making comments in his journal. Alex, you bitch! Are people suddenly hating me again or something? I never got the memo.
Nick and I ran into Ryan and Alissa today at Pick N' Save. I could barely think of anything more to say than "Hi," so our conversation went by fast. Sheesh, I still need to work on my social skills. And I've been making a big deal lately on how much I miss Alissa and Therese. You think I would have given her a hug or something if I miss seeing her so much. I planned on sending them random e-card thingies, but I'm too sleepy at the moment to pick one out and stuff.
I received a lot of online messages from people I haven't talked to in forever, most notably Marivel, Jennifer, Ledvia, Edith, and Denny. Today must be "Let's instant message JR because I haven't talked to him in months" day. Funny how these things seem to happen all at once, huh?
I'm not doing so well in my Engineering Economy class. And it makes me feel worse that Michael (MSU Michael) described it as some easy math class. I guess it'd be easy if I had more time in the day to devote to studying, but I work, and I'm in clubs, and I tutor friends when they need help. But my grade on my midterm makes me want to isolate myself to a closed room and work, work, work, and study, study, study. I guess I'll forever be stuck with "I must make perfect grades" syndrome. I try to get myself not to care about grades so much, but then I get people telling me, "Keep up that GPA, JR! You know you can do even better!"
I think I'm already enough of a workaholic. Maybe I don't work at an insane amount of hours at a job to earn a crapload of money like Nemo, but I think I've made several social sacrifices over the years just so I can devote myself to school. By the time I'm done with school, my friends aren't going to be grouped around me like they are now. My Mississippi and Wisconsin friends will all disperse, and I'll wish that I had hung out with them more. Heh, and it'd be nice if I could actually talk to some of my friends, rather than having them send me a one- or two-word message on Myspace or Facebook. It's even sillier when some of them live just a few floors above or below me. Even instant messaging is better than leaving an obscure message on a social website, hoping that I'll eventually read it when I eventually log on to that website. Why are people so addicted to the popularity of those websites? Popularity's a fickle concept, but I'll follow along if it'll get a few friends to communicate with me.
It's again that bias thing that gets in my way. If I acted like everyone else, people would talk to me more. I can't even get some friends in college whom I've known for three years to let me eat lunch with them. I really do want to become good friends with people, and this time, I don't think it's my fault for these friendships not blossoming. My anxiety doesn't make me hold back anymore; I'll go up and talk to you. But if you don't let me in, if you don't listen to me or talk back, how are we going to be anything more than classmates or acquiantances?
"Wow, JR, you're funny," said Liz last year, after watching The Skeleton Key with a group of friends. "We should hang out more."
I wish more people could see that. I'd appreciate it if my quest to form closer bonds with my friends in college wasn't one-sided.
The Japanese versions of the Little Mermaid sing-alongs on Kingdom Hearts II are so cool. It'd be so awesome if I learned how to sing "Under the Sea" or "Part of Your World" in Japanese. Translated Japanese lyrics that I could read and pronounce are hard to come by, though.
I don't think anyone cares anymore, but just in case you forgot, I have a website. I redesigned it using themes I downloaded. I figure that I must suck as a graphics designer, so I'll go ahead and use layouts and themes from people who actually know how to make websites look good. I still don't know what kinds of things I should talk about on my website or what topics I should have in my forums, but the worst part is that nobody gives me any suggestions on what they want, and then nobody goes to my website because they don't like what's on my website (or don't like that there's not really anything on my website at all). I think I've already given up on suggestions, though. Whenever I can get around to it, I'll start advertising it and see where it goes from there. I just hope I don't run into the same people I came across during my old days of web development. I still have a dozen or so emails and messages from people telling me how much they hate me and my websites.
I have a website. I have a cellphone. I have a dorm room phone. I'm on Facebook. I'm on MySpace. I use AIM. I use ICQ. I use MSN. I use Yahoo. I use GTalk. I use LiveJournal. I use JournalSpace. I have a Wikipedia account. I have a SlashDot account. I have 30 different email addresses. (If you pick a random website and send an email to zarjay@website.com, you'd probably be emailing me.) My weekly schedule is posted online and on my door. I have a window; you can even send a carrier pigeon if you have to. It's unbelievable that some people find it too difficult to keep in touch with me. You can basically find out everything about me, the websites I've been to, and my contact information, all by Googling "Zarjay" or "JR Shampang." I make myself widely available on purpose. No one has an excuse for not being able to keep in touch with me.
So college keeps me busy all the time, and I don't always have time for the friends who contact me, but I do enjoy the interruptions from familiar faces and voices. It keeps me sane and less inclined to become a hardcore robot who does nothing but schoolwork all day. While I can't stop myself from wanting to do everything in my power to make good grades (which includes shutting myself off from people sometimes), I can try to get people to bug me more. It'd also be nice if I had more friends to hang out with when I have some free time.
Seriously, I stay up late way too much.