It's not pretty being me....
I've realized something interesting: I have a battle that I fight whenever I might drink. I have let that battle be quite one sided for quite some time, but something my Dad said a few nights ago made a big difference. He said that the main reason he doesn't drink too much was because he doesn't like to loose control. It took me a few days, but then I realized the important difference between he and I was that I really don't care if I loose control. I wasn't using it anyway. That has been about the largest revelation that I've had in a very long time. It ranks right up there with realizing I was wishing I was female. Or, more recently, I'm that I'm bi and poly. All things that I would not have thought of on my own, but with the right stimulus I seem to have found some insight. Although, all of this makes it even that much more difficult for me to find someone who doesn't explode from my weirdness. Frankly, I might just explode from my weirdness.
~Zakipu
~Zakipu