Birthdays
I went out to another friend's birthday tonight. This one was dramatically less, well.. Dramatic. She just had a bunch of friends meet her at a restaurant for dinner. (The Mint) Food was good, if the cooks were a little slow.
It wasn't bad, but none too exciting either..
On my walk home I came to the realization that I am not as independent as I like to pull myself off as, or as much as I think I am. I am probably in danger of falling into a little bit of a gloomy mood (I hesitate to say 'depression') unless I surround myself with some people that care about me, or maybe one or two people that are really close to me. I find that I don't really have any of these after Alex, though there are a few of my friends I could fall into that sort of relationship with easily if I were regular in calling them or whatever.
Where do the hours in a day go, exactly? Ah, my friends, I seem to fill my time with going to this or that event, or hanging out here or there... And yet I continually find myself sitting in this chair doing 'nothing'
I don't want to live for those brief flashes of intense fun and happiness, I want there to be a calm undertow of pleasant contentedness. I used to have that, and not too long ago... Where did it go anyway? Oh right.
Blah!
I need to do something about this.
BUT, I have to stop, and remind myself, I need to leave time free to apartment-hunt... There isn't much time left..
It wasn't bad, but none too exciting either..
On my walk home I came to the realization that I am not as independent as I like to pull myself off as, or as much as I think I am. I am probably in danger of falling into a little bit of a gloomy mood (I hesitate to say 'depression') unless I surround myself with some people that care about me, or maybe one or two people that are really close to me. I find that I don't really have any of these after Alex, though there are a few of my friends I could fall into that sort of relationship with easily if I were regular in calling them or whatever.
Where do the hours in a day go, exactly? Ah, my friends, I seem to fill my time with going to this or that event, or hanging out here or there... And yet I continually find myself sitting in this chair doing 'nothing'
I don't want to live for those brief flashes of intense fun and happiness, I want there to be a calm undertow of pleasant contentedness. I used to have that, and not too long ago... Where did it go anyway? Oh right.
Blah!
I need to do something about this.
BUT, I have to stop, and remind myself, I need to leave time free to apartment-hunt... There isn't much time left..