Last hope
I'm sitting in Wyoming, I've driven hundreds of miles in the last few days. I'm rather lost, both physically and mentally. I feel like there is nothing but heartache back home. A girl that I loved once, but who hates me now and thinks I do shit that I don't do and thinks I'm nothing more than an immature asshole, but I want to be her friend and her to be mine. A family that guilt trips, uses, even abuses me, but is still my family. A dead end job in a failing music store, but the possibility of a great job in San Diego. Loser friends who just talk shit any chance they get and do little more than drink and smoke weed, but are always there for me. Or I continue onward, into the absolute unknown, no friends, no family, no Danielle. I'm really having a moral dilemna here. I am going to stop in the next town, hit a bar, and stay until I figure it out. I have $231.85 left over, so I think I can get home if I choose to, or I can get another few states away.
This is beautiful country out here. I've been driving on a lot of long, empty roads, doing speeds of over 90 mph usually. I wanted to get as far away as I could as quickly as I could so I missed a lot of the beauty of the past few states. But, it's snowing here and it just hit me what I am missing. I feel lucky that I have found so many chances to write on this livejournal thing because it has helped me work out a lot of issues. Now, I'm just wondering whether or not I am in a good enough place to head home or to keep going. Somebody needs to guide me. But my confidant and one-time dearest love won't talk to me, my sister has little to say, I'm not talking to my parents, my grandma, Dan, and Mike are impossible to get in touch with. So, I'm going to talk to the friendliest people on the planet, bartenders and drunks. I hope someone calls me back, because I really need some advice.
This is beautiful country out here. I've been driving on a lot of long, empty roads, doing speeds of over 90 mph usually. I wanted to get as far away as I could as quickly as I could so I missed a lot of the beauty of the past few states. But, it's snowing here and it just hit me what I am missing. I feel lucky that I have found so many chances to write on this livejournal thing because it has helped me work out a lot of issues. Now, I'm just wondering whether or not I am in a good enough place to head home or to keep going. Somebody needs to guide me. But my confidant and one-time dearest love won't talk to me, my sister has little to say, I'm not talking to my parents, my grandma, Dan, and Mike are impossible to get in touch with. So, I'm going to talk to the friendliest people on the planet, bartenders and drunks. I hope someone calls me back, because I really need some advice.