When the Time Comes: Why Sephy90 is Going to Die Alone and Accomplish Nothing
I think it's about time I just sort of vent about Sephy90 before something inside me explodes. Because, let's face it, if it has any hint of negative connotation, Sephy90 will make sure it is hidden seconds after it's posted and the world will never know what it is you said. He literally lurks around DeviantART enough that he is capable of doing this even in the wee hours of the morning. And he is able to do this, my friends, because Sephy90 is a man without direction. He has goals, as do most human beings, and he has dreams, but he has not a single inch of drive to do anything about them and instead just stares at his computer and waits for the world to just fall in his lap- just as everything else has.
In the rare moments I've gotten to speak to him, he exudes with every fiber of his being the aura of a sad, sad autist, coddled into a state of perpetual childlike naivete only made worse by the fact that I'm sure he thinks the world works like a poorly produced anime. His level of sheer ineptitude is so severe that, no matter how civil I approach him- if I'm actually able tot talk to him- nearing the end of any conversation I will be frothing with anger. The inability to have even the slightest intellectual conversation with this man is absolutely infuriating, seeing as he is only able to answer any given question with single-syllable words and, if you happen to appease him by ass-patting him or telling him the adopted anime girl characters he didn't create are cute, the "^^" emoticon. But I have spoken to him, or to people who have managed to squeeze some sort of coherent thought from him, and it's left me with a level of disdain I have yet to have for anyone.
I want Sephy90 to die alone without having accomplished any of his dreams or goals.
There have been times where I wished people would leave me alone or suffer some sort of physical harm, but not this man. He lives in a dream world where everything is spoon-fed to him while he flails around like an infant, slapping his keyboard and somehow creating what appears to be a foreigner's grasp of what English is supposed to be. I want him to spend every last waking moment of his life without any physical contact with people who want to show him an inkling of friendship. I want him to never find love, or even the slightest possibility. I want him to be perpetually reaching half-heartedly for the things he wants with his meaty arms and never actually grasp them. I want no one by his side when he dies, and I want no record of him ever giving anything back to society in any way at all. I want him to just stay sitting at his computer, lusting after Katsuragi Yako and beating off to the thought of hot anime girls lapping up his semen until the day his body can no longer function.
And he is, without a doubt, running full speed ahead toward that kind of life, and I'm just standing here, watching him do it with a shit-eating grin on my face. Just the other night, I had the opportunity to possibly give Sephy90 a quick little lesson about how the female species worked in terms of feelings of attraction and intimacy, but I didn't. Shun, curious, asked me why I didn't, despite there being the rare time where there was an open forum between me and the man-child. My answer was simple: if I told him about how girls actually worked on a psychological level, he'd be that much closer to understanding what he was doing wrong, and possibly finding someone who could stand him. I don't want that- the only female I ever want giving him attention is his mother. I don't want to give him any sort of advantage at all. He, to me, has yet to deserve it. Why. you might ask? Well, I'll give you a detailed list of why I can't stand that this man exists somewhere in my plane of existence, but first I'll boil it down to four simple words:
When the time comes.
When asking Sephy about anything, he'll say something to effect of the above. He'll get around to getting an education- when the time comes. He'll find a girlfriend and be able to actually interact with her like a regular human being- when the time comes. He'll pursue his dream job- when the time comes. He'll actually put effort into his stories and seek grammatical help- when the time comes. He'll get around to it later, it'll get done when it gets done, later, but not right now. No matter how dire the goal, Sephy90 remains in a loop of perpetual procrastination. He hasn't the drive to do anything worth while aside from sit around and flagrantly waste government money. "When the time comes" is only an illusion to distract the especially gullible and soft into thinking that he might actually DO SOMETHING someday. But he won't. He'll never find anyone or do anything worth while. and here, my friends, is why:
Sephy90 doesn't have any real concept of the value of money or how one earns it
Sephy90 makes money by way of welfare. He shows no actual awareness of what exactly it might be, but he shows all the signs of being someone in the tight and unrelenting throws of some sort of autism, and at the very least his parents were able to catch on and realize their son probably would have a hard time adjusting to the real world come his high school graduation. So, around the time he was 18 or so, he was diagnosed and what proceeds, in his own account, will make anyone struggling to get by, or someone who lives on welfare themselves, to restrain themselves from punching something with a considerable amount of force. His parents applied for welfare on his behalf, and the process of receiving it, according to Sephy90, goes as follows: his parents went downtown to a tall building and got him money. I shit you not, that isn't be trying to make him sound absolutely mentally retarded. This is literally how Sephy90 describes how he came into receiving checks from the government every month. This makes me, specifically, unbelievably angry because I myself found myself in the same situation (if you actually go back far enough, I recounted the events on this very website).
Around the time I was 19 or so, my mom suddenly became very concerned about getting me diagnosed to see if I had some sort of autism myself- and, as it turns out, I do. Turns out it was all a ploy to get more child support from my dad, but the subject of welfare was brought up. But I knew, at the time, having money just being given to me would solve none of my problems. I was going nowhere, drifting aimlessly through college and spending most of my time in front of a computer. I knew, with no job and no real sense of where I was going, I would have done so many unwise things with money that was given to me without any sort of effort on my part. So I chose not to apply, and tried to live my life like a normal person, struggled to find a job and somehow wormed my way through the stages of actually growing up and accepting responsibility to where I'm living on my own, paying my own bills. Now I wish I had money that just showed up every month so I could pay for gas without worrying about rent, or pay or rent without worrying about gas or food money. Sephy90 doesn't have these worries, and now that I live on my own and support myself, the fact he gets money for doing nothing but being mentally incapable to some degree and what he DOES with it makes me furious. He isn't using it to fund an education, or possibly using it to get himself by while he looks for a job so he can move out and join society. He's using it to buy himself a perpetual sub on dA. He's using it to commission artists all over dA to draw inflation art and Yako fantasy porn for him. He's buying expensive Japanese figurines and manga he can't even read. He's doing nothing of worth with the money that's supposed to help him become a functioning adult- he's only using it so he can continue to act like a child with no responsibility.
Sephy90 has goals he wants to achieve, but has no idea how to achieve them or what they even entail
I asked Sephy90 what he wanted to do with his life once. He told me he wanted to be a meteorologist, and I was honestly shocked he had something he wanted to do with his life that had a specific name and was a legitimate field of study, no less. But then I came to find his was the equivalent of a kindergartener saying they want to be a fireman or a policeman: the thought of having the title sounds really cool and they have no idea what steps they would have to take to get to that point. Or, in Sephy's case, he likes looking outside and watching weather happen. This, apparently, is what Sephy90 thinks meteorology is: people sitting around and watching the clouds roll by for a living (funny, since I'm pretty sure this is what Sephy90 does when he isn't glued to his computer with one hand glued to his cock). If you are or are studying to be a meteorologist, then I'm sure you're understandably upset to think this is what a 23-year-old man thinks you do. I'm not going to act like i know everything about Meteorology, but I'm pretty sure it doesn't involve looking outside and shouting to everyone that it's raining. It's a fucking science- the study of the atmosphere! Not the study of "ooh, that cloud looks like a rabbit"!
Almost in the same breath, Sephy90 also stated that he hated math and wanted nothing to do with it. Do I really need to continue?
Sephy90 knows nothing about women, relationships or how they behave and why
The big one. Oh my goodness is this the big one, folks. Sephy knows more about meteorology than he does about girls- at least you can look up meteorology on wikipedia. Actually knowing how girls in the real world behave requires getting out of your house and actually speaking to real people- a skill of which Sephy90 is incapable.
If it's one thing Sephy90's world revolves around, it's romance- or rather the thinly veiled illusion of what anime and porn has taught him romance is. He wants a companion more than anything, as proof of his fixation with anime women and how often he asks people to draw him and them being intimate together and the sheer amount of female characters he buys off of people to horde. That being said, if it's one thing his own literature has taught us, Sephy90 believes romance works on a "love at first sight" basis, and you don't need to be friends with them or even know them at all to actually start a relationship with them. It's all very fairy-tale and juvenile- something you'd expect to get out of a six-year old who just came off watching any odd classic Disney princess staple. you just need to find the one and then you'll just know, man!
Every time the subject of potential future romance has come up, Sephy90 has absolutely befuddled me with his answers. Upon being asked about his feelings for Katsuragi Yako, the female lead of the manga Majin Tantei Nougami Neuro, he responded that he actually has a voice inside of his head who ass-pats him and tells him how great he is who he dubs Yako. Whenever he's sad or nervous or upset, he doesn't seek out actual human comfort and instead turns to his imaginary anime girlfriend for support. This is a fine and dandy thing to do- if you're two years old. Ignoring the fact glaring fact that a man in his twenties had an imaginary friend, it was instead asked what he would do if he happened to somehow, by some miracle, find a real girl who would love and support him. He would, of course, discard the pretend anime waifu he had created in his mind and instead turn to the physical embraces of a woman insane enough to love him, right? Yeah, sure, if Sephy90 was a decent human being who felt empathy for other people. Instead, he said he would continue to talk and turn to Yako- going as far as to insinuate he would still love her and actually turn to her for support and comfort more than his actual girlfriend. He was told this was insensitive and wrong- and goodness, what would he do if his girlfriend found out he loved another woman? A FAKE one no less? Having hit a mental brick wall over the fact that Sephy90 doesn't know how regular humans behave, he turned to the default answer of he would cross that bridge when he got to it. You know, when the time comes. This usually signals the end of any potential conversation because you have reached the capacity of Sephy90's knowledge of women. He doesn't know what he would do if he had a real life girlfriend because he created what he deems to be the perfect woman in his head and doesn't want to let her go for anything.
Despite his ineptitude about romance and intimacy, Sephy90 like to pretend he knows everything about romance and intimacy. Just the other night I was somehow able to coax out of him why it is the female characters he collects all happen to like semen. He started off in a way that made me realize he probably thinks I'm a little kid and don't know anything about relationships. "You'll understand when you find someone" he told me, as if he actually had a girlfriend who wasn't made up and wasn't the product of what could possibly mimic schizophrenia.This, my friends, was when Sephy90 actually managed to insult me. Whether or not he even meant to, he pretty much told me, the woman who has been in a relationship with a man for almost two years who she now lives with, didn't know anything about relationships and human intimacy while he, a man who lives in fantasy land and probably never leaves his house did. Me, the woman who has been in a decent handful of relationships with both men and women and him, who probably has never held held hands with someone other than immediate family. He, who loves a figment of his imagination who only does what he wants her to do. He, who thinks that the bond between two people all comes down to semen.
Instead of tearing him a new one and rubbing my relationship that people have mistaken for marriage in his face, I simply told him I had, in fact, "found someone" so he had to come up with a different answer explaining the whole semen thing. "It's how they fare" he told me, "Sometimes they just get urges". I wanted to correct him. I wanted to correct him so bad. Maybe it's just his own personal fetish- maybe there are people out there like this, but for the most part, girls don't suddenly become overcome with the need to consume a man's semen. These are all imaginary women, as are all of Sephy90's relationships, where the girl likes and dislikes everything he does and only does what he wants and acts the way he wants them to. He's setting himself up for failure by setting this as the standard, seeing as he prefaced this with "you'll understand when you find someone"- like the need to consume seed is an essential part of what makes a relationship between two people something more.
He doesn't know that women aren't just an overall collection of his fetishes. He doesn't know that semen really isn't an essential part of lovemaking. He only knows what he's thought up- and even the most ridiculous things are reality. He only knows what's on his computer screen, what he finds attractive and what anime has told him women do and say. Sephy90 doesn't live in the real world with real women- women who won't fall head over heels with him at first glance. Women who won't have an insatiable need for his man juice. Women aren't just a collection of cute anime tropes. But Sephy90 doesn't know this, because he doesn't live in reality.
And this does for pretty much everything else. Sephy90 lives in a world where everything is pretend and goes his way. Where he can be anything he can name, despite knowing nothing about it. Where money just falls into his lap, and where he isn't penalized for wasting it away month after month. People like him don't function in the real world, where you can't hide every negative thing people say, where people work hard for their money and use it wisely, and where they work hard to find out just exactly what it is they want to do and actually go to great lengths to achieve their goals. People like Sephy90 die alone, and I'm perfectly alright with that.
May "when the time comes" never come.
In the rare moments I've gotten to speak to him, he exudes with every fiber of his being the aura of a sad, sad autist, coddled into a state of perpetual childlike naivete only made worse by the fact that I'm sure he thinks the world works like a poorly produced anime. His level of sheer ineptitude is so severe that, no matter how civil I approach him- if I'm actually able tot talk to him- nearing the end of any conversation I will be frothing with anger. The inability to have even the slightest intellectual conversation with this man is absolutely infuriating, seeing as he is only able to answer any given question with single-syllable words and, if you happen to appease him by ass-patting him or telling him the adopted anime girl characters he didn't create are cute, the "^^" emoticon. But I have spoken to him, or to people who have managed to squeeze some sort of coherent thought from him, and it's left me with a level of disdain I have yet to have for anyone.
I want Sephy90 to die alone without having accomplished any of his dreams or goals.
There have been times where I wished people would leave me alone or suffer some sort of physical harm, but not this man. He lives in a dream world where everything is spoon-fed to him while he flails around like an infant, slapping his keyboard and somehow creating what appears to be a foreigner's grasp of what English is supposed to be. I want him to spend every last waking moment of his life without any physical contact with people who want to show him an inkling of friendship. I want him to never find love, or even the slightest possibility. I want him to be perpetually reaching half-heartedly for the things he wants with his meaty arms and never actually grasp them. I want no one by his side when he dies, and I want no record of him ever giving anything back to society in any way at all. I want him to just stay sitting at his computer, lusting after Katsuragi Yako and beating off to the thought of hot anime girls lapping up his semen until the day his body can no longer function.
And he is, without a doubt, running full speed ahead toward that kind of life, and I'm just standing here, watching him do it with a shit-eating grin on my face. Just the other night, I had the opportunity to possibly give Sephy90 a quick little lesson about how the female species worked in terms of feelings of attraction and intimacy, but I didn't. Shun, curious, asked me why I didn't, despite there being the rare time where there was an open forum between me and the man-child. My answer was simple: if I told him about how girls actually worked on a psychological level, he'd be that much closer to understanding what he was doing wrong, and possibly finding someone who could stand him. I don't want that- the only female I ever want giving him attention is his mother. I don't want to give him any sort of advantage at all. He, to me, has yet to deserve it. Why. you might ask? Well, I'll give you a detailed list of why I can't stand that this man exists somewhere in my plane of existence, but first I'll boil it down to four simple words:
When the time comes.
When asking Sephy about anything, he'll say something to effect of the above. He'll get around to getting an education- when the time comes. He'll find a girlfriend and be able to actually interact with her like a regular human being- when the time comes. He'll pursue his dream job- when the time comes. He'll actually put effort into his stories and seek grammatical help- when the time comes. He'll get around to it later, it'll get done when it gets done, later, but not right now. No matter how dire the goal, Sephy90 remains in a loop of perpetual procrastination. He hasn't the drive to do anything worth while aside from sit around and flagrantly waste government money. "When the time comes" is only an illusion to distract the especially gullible and soft into thinking that he might actually DO SOMETHING someday. But he won't. He'll never find anyone or do anything worth while. and here, my friends, is why:
Sephy90 doesn't have any real concept of the value of money or how one earns it
Sephy90 makes money by way of welfare. He shows no actual awareness of what exactly it might be, but he shows all the signs of being someone in the tight and unrelenting throws of some sort of autism, and at the very least his parents were able to catch on and realize their son probably would have a hard time adjusting to the real world come his high school graduation. So, around the time he was 18 or so, he was diagnosed and what proceeds, in his own account, will make anyone struggling to get by, or someone who lives on welfare themselves, to restrain themselves from punching something with a considerable amount of force. His parents applied for welfare on his behalf, and the process of receiving it, according to Sephy90, goes as follows: his parents went downtown to a tall building and got him money. I shit you not, that isn't be trying to make him sound absolutely mentally retarded. This is literally how Sephy90 describes how he came into receiving checks from the government every month. This makes me, specifically, unbelievably angry because I myself found myself in the same situation (if you actually go back far enough, I recounted the events on this very website).
Around the time I was 19 or so, my mom suddenly became very concerned about getting me diagnosed to see if I had some sort of autism myself- and, as it turns out, I do. Turns out it was all a ploy to get more child support from my dad, but the subject of welfare was brought up. But I knew, at the time, having money just being given to me would solve none of my problems. I was going nowhere, drifting aimlessly through college and spending most of my time in front of a computer. I knew, with no job and no real sense of where I was going, I would have done so many unwise things with money that was given to me without any sort of effort on my part. So I chose not to apply, and tried to live my life like a normal person, struggled to find a job and somehow wormed my way through the stages of actually growing up and accepting responsibility to where I'm living on my own, paying my own bills. Now I wish I had money that just showed up every month so I could pay for gas without worrying about rent, or pay or rent without worrying about gas or food money. Sephy90 doesn't have these worries, and now that I live on my own and support myself, the fact he gets money for doing nothing but being mentally incapable to some degree and what he DOES with it makes me furious. He isn't using it to fund an education, or possibly using it to get himself by while he looks for a job so he can move out and join society. He's using it to buy himself a perpetual sub on dA. He's using it to commission artists all over dA to draw inflation art and Yako fantasy porn for him. He's buying expensive Japanese figurines and manga he can't even read. He's doing nothing of worth with the money that's supposed to help him become a functioning adult- he's only using it so he can continue to act like a child with no responsibility.
Sephy90 has goals he wants to achieve, but has no idea how to achieve them or what they even entail
I asked Sephy90 what he wanted to do with his life once. He told me he wanted to be a meteorologist, and I was honestly shocked he had something he wanted to do with his life that had a specific name and was a legitimate field of study, no less. But then I came to find his was the equivalent of a kindergartener saying they want to be a fireman or a policeman: the thought of having the title sounds really cool and they have no idea what steps they would have to take to get to that point. Or, in Sephy's case, he likes looking outside and watching weather happen. This, apparently, is what Sephy90 thinks meteorology is: people sitting around and watching the clouds roll by for a living (funny, since I'm pretty sure this is what Sephy90 does when he isn't glued to his computer with one hand glued to his cock). If you are or are studying to be a meteorologist, then I'm sure you're understandably upset to think this is what a 23-year-old man thinks you do. I'm not going to act like i know everything about Meteorology, but I'm pretty sure it doesn't involve looking outside and shouting to everyone that it's raining. It's a fucking science- the study of the atmosphere! Not the study of "ooh, that cloud looks like a rabbit"!
Almost in the same breath, Sephy90 also stated that he hated math and wanted nothing to do with it. Do I really need to continue?
Sephy90 knows nothing about women, relationships or how they behave and why
The big one. Oh my goodness is this the big one, folks. Sephy knows more about meteorology than he does about girls- at least you can look up meteorology on wikipedia. Actually knowing how girls in the real world behave requires getting out of your house and actually speaking to real people- a skill of which Sephy90 is incapable.
If it's one thing Sephy90's world revolves around, it's romance- or rather the thinly veiled illusion of what anime and porn has taught him romance is. He wants a companion more than anything, as proof of his fixation with anime women and how often he asks people to draw him and them being intimate together and the sheer amount of female characters he buys off of people to horde. That being said, if it's one thing his own literature has taught us, Sephy90 believes romance works on a "love at first sight" basis, and you don't need to be friends with them or even know them at all to actually start a relationship with them. It's all very fairy-tale and juvenile- something you'd expect to get out of a six-year old who just came off watching any odd classic Disney princess staple. you just need to find the one and then you'll just know, man!
Every time the subject of potential future romance has come up, Sephy90 has absolutely befuddled me with his answers. Upon being asked about his feelings for Katsuragi Yako, the female lead of the manga Majin Tantei Nougami Neuro, he responded that he actually has a voice inside of his head who ass-pats him and tells him how great he is who he dubs Yako. Whenever he's sad or nervous or upset, he doesn't seek out actual human comfort and instead turns to his imaginary anime girlfriend for support. This is a fine and dandy thing to do- if you're two years old. Ignoring the fact glaring fact that a man in his twenties had an imaginary friend, it was instead asked what he would do if he happened to somehow, by some miracle, find a real girl who would love and support him. He would, of course, discard the pretend anime waifu he had created in his mind and instead turn to the physical embraces of a woman insane enough to love him, right? Yeah, sure, if Sephy90 was a decent human being who felt empathy for other people. Instead, he said he would continue to talk and turn to Yako- going as far as to insinuate he would still love her and actually turn to her for support and comfort more than his actual girlfriend. He was told this was insensitive and wrong- and goodness, what would he do if his girlfriend found out he loved another woman? A FAKE one no less? Having hit a mental brick wall over the fact that Sephy90 doesn't know how regular humans behave, he turned to the default answer of he would cross that bridge when he got to it. You know, when the time comes. This usually signals the end of any potential conversation because you have reached the capacity of Sephy90's knowledge of women. He doesn't know what he would do if he had a real life girlfriend because he created what he deems to be the perfect woman in his head and doesn't want to let her go for anything.
Despite his ineptitude about romance and intimacy, Sephy90 like to pretend he knows everything about romance and intimacy. Just the other night I was somehow able to coax out of him why it is the female characters he collects all happen to like semen. He started off in a way that made me realize he probably thinks I'm a little kid and don't know anything about relationships. "You'll understand when you find someone" he told me, as if he actually had a girlfriend who wasn't made up and wasn't the product of what could possibly mimic schizophrenia.This, my friends, was when Sephy90 actually managed to insult me. Whether or not he even meant to, he pretty much told me, the woman who has been in a relationship with a man for almost two years who she now lives with, didn't know anything about relationships and human intimacy while he, a man who lives in fantasy land and probably never leaves his house did. Me, the woman who has been in a decent handful of relationships with both men and women and him, who probably has never held held hands with someone other than immediate family. He, who loves a figment of his imagination who only does what he wants her to do. He, who thinks that the bond between two people all comes down to semen.
Instead of tearing him a new one and rubbing my relationship that people have mistaken for marriage in his face, I simply told him I had, in fact, "found someone" so he had to come up with a different answer explaining the whole semen thing. "It's how they fare" he told me, "Sometimes they just get urges". I wanted to correct him. I wanted to correct him so bad. Maybe it's just his own personal fetish- maybe there are people out there like this, but for the most part, girls don't suddenly become overcome with the need to consume a man's semen. These are all imaginary women, as are all of Sephy90's relationships, where the girl likes and dislikes everything he does and only does what he wants and acts the way he wants them to. He's setting himself up for failure by setting this as the standard, seeing as he prefaced this with "you'll understand when you find someone"- like the need to consume seed is an essential part of what makes a relationship between two people something more.
He doesn't know that women aren't just an overall collection of his fetishes. He doesn't know that semen really isn't an essential part of lovemaking. He only knows what he's thought up- and even the most ridiculous things are reality. He only knows what's on his computer screen, what he finds attractive and what anime has told him women do and say. Sephy90 doesn't live in the real world with real women- women who won't fall head over heels with him at first glance. Women who won't have an insatiable need for his man juice. Women aren't just a collection of cute anime tropes. But Sephy90 doesn't know this, because he doesn't live in reality.
And this does for pretty much everything else. Sephy90 lives in a world where everything is pretend and goes his way. Where he can be anything he can name, despite knowing nothing about it. Where money just falls into his lap, and where he isn't penalized for wasting it away month after month. People like him don't function in the real world, where you can't hide every negative thing people say, where people work hard for their money and use it wisely, and where they work hard to find out just exactly what it is they want to do and actually go to great lengths to achieve their goals. People like Sephy90 die alone, and I'm perfectly alright with that.
May "when the time comes" never come.