"dreams" and rambling
"A dream put off is like a raisin in the sun." --Langston Hughes
That's exactly what I'm afraid of.
(So many dreams that I have that I can't fulfill. Some because of youth, some because of monogamy, some because of poverty. Talk about frustration.)
I like:
- sitting on the lakeshore at Faire and seeing all the booths and people wandering
- washing dishes because I feel productive
- always having a ponytail holder when I need one
- sitting in the shower just to think
- leather, suede, and fur
- transparent lighters
- hearing someone else say "I'm sorry," even though I feel bad for letting them feel guilty
- Crunch bars
- talking into the wee hours of the night and finally falling sleep near someone else
- my rune necklace. The rune looks like P and means joy
- knowing that I could have the ones that I want
- throwing knives (really like)
- long nails
I don't like:
- not having enough breath to walk and sing at the same time
- quiet people
- guilt
- folks without the courage to try to get what they want
- waiting in lines, including traffic
- not being allowed to get what I want
- stupid arguments
- trying to catch bugs and missing
- making an effort to talk to someone and they're not there *pout*
- meat. unless it's poultry, sometimes
At least 2 new pirates supposed to join LRF cast next year. Two damn good ones. And it's the year I'm leaving. And if I stay, I'll be on the second rank! God-fucking-dammit! I hate moving. It better damn well be worth it. I know the first while will, it better stay good.
I really like Sid. Sid is one of the most awesome people I have ever known. He has always been patient with me, is good with a dirty joke but isn't dirty himself, he's very useful, very understanding, and a right fine pirate. With AWEsome hair. He's the kind of person I'd want my sister to marry, if I had a sister. I just can't see him marrying a man though. Sid is really awesome.
Bean rocks my socks. Mostly just because he's borderline goth. (Dresses the part, properly cynical and open-minded, etc.) And he's a pirate. Rock on. Supposed to be on cast as one next year. I hope he is. Even though I won't be there for it.
I'm going to miss working Faire. A huge fucking lot. I hope I get to visit next year.
I wish I could've experienced Faire to the fullest. I wish I could've enjoyed that extra bit. I wish I could've tasted all of it, its people. So many individual regrets lumped together make one giant one.
HUGS!
Yvenna