idk
This is really random entry, but I am exhausted both physically and mentally and I just need to get this out before I start studying for my next final x_x
For the past week or so I've been having these dreams that involve my ex(aka the one who was my best friend, broke my heart, likes to re-appear in my life, basically stole my head-coaching job from me last summer, is ENGAGED :|, etc etc) and like...it's just been really fucking with my head.
I came to a point this summer where I was just done with my feelings for him(plus, lol, HE'S ENGAGED --;) and his bullshit and I was like 'lol okay, I'm done, you're not worth my time or energy anymore' and that was that. And it was good.
but now with these dreams it's like....I mean, it's not that we're together, but we;re friends like we used to be and it's...nice? idk :| I keep waking up in these dazes because I'm not quite sure what to make of it. One was like...he saved my life because I almost got hit by a car and another was us having classes together and just being happy.
I honestly don't know what my brain or heart want me to do with this shit, because the chance of us even becoming 'good' friends is like, slim to none, and honestly, we have too much bad history that I wouldn't even want that.
all in all, idk what this entry is, but i had to let this out somehow and just be done with it, because I need to be done with it.
For the past week or so I've been having these dreams that involve my ex(aka the one who was my best friend, broke my heart, likes to re-appear in my life, basically stole my head-coaching job from me last summer, is ENGAGED :|, etc etc) and like...it's just been really fucking with my head.
I came to a point this summer where I was just done with my feelings for him(plus, lol, HE'S ENGAGED --;) and his bullshit and I was like 'lol okay, I'm done, you're not worth my time or energy anymore' and that was that. And it was good.
but now with these dreams it's like....I mean, it's not that we're together, but we;re friends like we used to be and it's...nice? idk :| I keep waking up in these dazes because I'm not quite sure what to make of it. One was like...he saved my life because I almost got hit by a car and another was us having classes together and just being happy.
I honestly don't know what my brain or heart want me to do with this shit, because the chance of us even becoming 'good' friends is like, slim to none, and honestly, we have too much bad history that I wouldn't even want that.
all in all, idk what this entry is, but i had to let this out somehow and just be done with it, because I need to be done with it.