Congratulations to Senator Obama. Please, please don't mess it up. I'm the only person in my family who voted for you, and I'm already enough of a black sheep (NO PUN INTENDED, THANK YOU) that I don't need them constantly picking at your administrative policies and telling me that I was a fool for voting for you.
Senator McCain, I thought your concession speech was eloquent and tactful, and you have my respect for it. You have my respect...provided you never again utter the phrase "The Mac is Back." Please find another catchphrase.
To my friends who voted for Obama, I hope you are having the party of the century right about now. To my friends who voted for McCain, he ran a good race, and I hope you can still find some peace of mind with the new President-elect.
To Sarah Palin: Please just go back to Alaska.
And finally, let's leave it to The Onion to put it all in perspective:
Black Man Given Nation's Worst Job Nation Finally Shitty Enough to Make Social Progress.