i'm so blah....
Have you ever felt that things were going well, but falling apart at the same time?
I do right now. I'm done with school. Done student teaching and getting some assemblence of a life back together. I have wonderful friends. I have a bunch of kittens that I love taking care of. My family is great. everything is fine, but there is something missing.
That touch. I'm damn lonely. I may not show it or act it but I am. I feel as though there still is this huge hole inside of me that will never be filled no matter how much jolliness and merriment I may take in. (I know I made up those words.) Am I happy with being single? Yes and no. Yes because there is a freedom in not having to worry about anyone but myself. And no because there isn't someone who I divulge secrets to and love me for me. I got so used to saying I love you to someone over the past three years that when I say them now to myself they seem hollow.
I have a going away party on saturday that Melissa at work has organized for me, probably one of the nicest things that anyone has ever done for me in a while. I appreciate it. Now its off to bed after the kittens get fed.
I do right now. I'm done with school. Done student teaching and getting some assemblence of a life back together. I have wonderful friends. I have a bunch of kittens that I love taking care of. My family is great. everything is fine, but there is something missing.
That touch. I'm damn lonely. I may not show it or act it but I am. I feel as though there still is this huge hole inside of me that will never be filled no matter how much jolliness and merriment I may take in. (I know I made up those words.) Am I happy with being single? Yes and no. Yes because there is a freedom in not having to worry about anyone but myself. And no because there isn't someone who I divulge secrets to and love me for me. I got so used to saying I love you to someone over the past three years that when I say them now to myself they seem hollow.
I have a going away party on saturday that Melissa at work has organized for me, probably one of the nicest things that anyone has ever done for me in a while. I appreciate it. Now its off to bed after the kittens get fed.