Answer part 2
Jun found himself anxious on Saturday morning. He made sure that he shaved properly; he checked his reflection longer than usual and he spent almost half an hour to decide what to wear. He always took a good care of his appearance and it was kind of surprising how the meeting with Ohno that day concerned him to no end. He laughed at himself as he remembered that Ohno was a kind of person who didn’t mind wearing a worn-out T-shirt, he wouldn’t pay attention on Jun’s outfit after all.
He glanced every five minutes to the clock on the wall which gained a suspicious gaze from Nino.
“Is there something interesting in that clock?” Nino asked.
Jun raised his brows at the sarcastic question and gave no answer. When Ohno appeared in front of their shop, Nino finally understood. He wished Jun a good day with an amused face as if he had just win a bid.
Ohno wore a presentable outfit this time, even though they were still low by Jun’s standard.
“You look gorgeous,” Ohno said as the replacement of greeting.
“Thanks,” Jun replied, hoping that his face wasn’t heating up. “Two hours, like you said. Nino doesn’t tolerate more than that,” he added. Of course, he lied, Nino doesn’t mind at all. Jun knew that Nino and Aiba were speculating behind the door about him and Ohno.
“Sure, should I call a cab?” Ohno asked.
“No, let’s just go by train, my toe is healing and maybe it’s good for me to stretch the weakened muscle after resting for some times,” Jun replied.
“Okay,” Ohno nodded, letting Jun lead the way towards Ikebukuro station.
Ohno remained standing on the train right in front of Jun’s seat as if protecting him from the other passengers; he still hadn’t told Jun where they would go. They changed train at Ebisu Station and continued their trip towards Hiro-o Station. Ohno finally handed Jun a ticket when they were already outside the station.
“Kaikai Kiki Gallery,” Jun read the ticket and looked at Ohno whose lips curved in smile.
“I want to enjoy the artworks with you,” Ohno said.
“I’m not that knowledgeable about arts,” Jun replied, walking beside Ohno who he just realized was far shorter than him. “By the way, why Sakurai-san permits you to leave the gallery every now and then. Don’t you have work to do?”
Ohno stopped and turned at Jun, “I just need to decorate the gallery for the opening, so technically I’ve finished my work.”
Jun wasn’t convinced; but decided not to ask any further. They continued walking towards the gallery in silence, sometimes, Ohno turned at him to make sure that Jun was still there. It was Jun’s third time to meet Ohno, but it felt that he had known the man longer than that. There was something familiar in this guy, but Jun couldn’t guess what it was.
They entered the gallery which displayed artworks by James Jean. The colorful paintings with typical beautiful patterns welcomed them. Both of them spent 15 to 20 minutes on each painting and when they reached the last work, three hours had passed. None of them mentioned that they spent longer than planned. When Ohno invited Jun for a cup of tea at the café inside the gallery, he immediately agreed.
It had been ages since Jun spent time with someone on weekend. He usually worked harder on Saturday and denied Nino’s idea that he needed some vacation once in a while. Now, he found himself sitting across of the man who broke his toe, a man who couldn’t even dressed himself properly.
“Thanks for coming with me,” Ohno said.
“Don’t mention it, I enjoy it a lot, so I’m the one who must thank you,” Jun replied. He looked at Ohno’s suntanned face which surprisingly didn’t make the man less attractive. Ohno probably wasn’t the most fashionable guy, but Jun found his smile was lovely, a kind of unforgettable smile that Jun liked.
“Would you visit our gallery again?” Ohno asked.
“Sure,” Jun answered. “But I hope no one will break my bones next time.”
Ohno laughed; a kind of laughter which left a deep impression inside Jun’s heart. He went home with high spirit and couldn’t wait to see Ohno again, but the guy wasn’t at the Free Style Gallery when Jun visited there the following week. Sakurai only said that Ohno went to Nagano’s gallery, but didn’t inform him when the man would be back.
“This is a gift, you don’t need to pay for this,” Sakurai said, handing Jun the painting he had wanted to purchase.
“Wait, you said that you would give me discount, not for free,” Jun said, looking at the painting with disbelief.
“The owner wants you to have it.”
“The owner never meets me,” Jun said, looking at Sakurai whose lips curved in a weak smile.
“Just take it, he will fire me if I fail to persuade you,” Sakurai said with light tone.
The painting decorated the shop’s wall and that was the first time Nino didn’t voice his protest. On the contrary, he praised Jun’s choice and said that the painting perfectly suited the summer.
Jun didn’t hear from Ohno for the next two weeks; he didn’t have Ohno’s phone number. He should have asked Sakurai, but he didn’t want to give an impression that he had some kind of attachment with the man. Nino had already teased him on daily basis that he and Ohno would make a sweet couple.
“A perfect combination, J. You can teach him how to dress,” Nino said while laughing.
At first, Jun thought that it was a stupid idea if he and Ohno really became a couple. They were too different in term of personality and in fashion sense. Imagining himself walk hand in hand with Ohno was amusing. But after two weeks without hearing anything from the man, Jun found that he missed Ohno’s presence. Not that he knew the man that much, but he realized that Ohno could keep him calm and relax. A strange thought, but it was what happened.
Ohno finally returned to Tokyo in the middle of August. He visited the shop on Thursday night with some souvenirs for Jun, Nino, and Aiba.
“J missed you so much, Ohno-san,” Nino said as he put the cup in front of Ohno.
“You don’t need to embarrass me like that, Nino,” Jun replied, avoiding Ohno’s gaze.
“Did you really miss me?” Ohno confirmed when Nino disappeared to the kitchen.
“At some point,” Jun admitted.
“I’m glad,” Ohno said after a series of silence. “Nobody missed before, you’re the first.”
“Liar,” Jun replied. He knew that Ohno was flirting with him, but he found it cute. “Give me your number this time, so I can text you next time when you’re away.”
“I don’t use smartphone,” Ohno replied.
Jun needed a couple of seconds before he finally digested what Ohno meant. “What are you using? A telegraph machines?” he rolled his eyes.
Ohno seemed not affected by Jun’s reaction. He reached his cup and gave his coffee another sip before answering.
“You can always find me in the gallery, it’s not that far away,” Ohno shrugged. He appeared not to understand why Jun was so amused by the fact that he didn’t use any smartphones. “Or I can come by every day, so you can always see me.”
“That’s the funniest thing I’ve ever heard,” Jun replied, even though he didn’t mind if he had to visit the gallery three times a week. The thought was indeed confused him; since when he felt attached to Ohno? The last person on his list that he could befriend with. But Jun couldn’t deny the fact that he loved their casual conversation, the way Ohno talked or the way he listened to Jun.
For the rest two months, both of them met on a regular basis and it was always Jun who decided where and when they met. Sometimes, they met at Free Style Gallery; Ohno and Sakurai had made a little space at the back of the gallery where they could take a rest and drink some coffee. Sometimes, Ohno visited Jun at his shop after the closing time where they could talk without any disturbance.
Nino always asked whether they were dating and Jun’s answer was always the same: “No, we’re just friends, he happens to know a lot about arts so I enjoy talking to him.”
“What if he says he loves you?” Nino asked, when they cleaned the tables before opening their shop.
“I’ll say thanks,” Jun replied.
Nino snorted. Jun knew that Nino and Aiba made progress in their relationship, he even found them holding hands during one of the lunch breaks, but he pretended not realizing it. Nino sometimes liked to keep things to himself.
***
It was Jun’s nth visit to Free Style Gallery when he found it was closed. He hesitated for a while and was on his way back when Ohno called him.
“Jun-kun.”
Jun turned at him and saw Ohno was in spectacular mess; his white T-shirt was full of dirt which looked like a splash from water colors. The towel he wrapped around his head was not even better.
“Come in, we’re closed, but you can always visit,” he said, grinning at Jun as if felt sorry for his mess.
Jun followed Ohno’s steps and walked through the dark gallery towards the room in the back.
“Why are you closing?” Jun asked.
“Sho-kun is not here, I can’t do his job, so we’re closed for two days,” Ohno replied, gesturing Jun to sit down meanwhile he disappeared to another room and returned five minutes later without any explanations.
“You’re so messy,” Jun commented.
“Sorry, I was moving some supply of pastels and water colors, some of them must have splashed everywhere when I accidently dropped them.”
Ohno avoided Jun’s eyes as he spoke and busied himself by pouring a glass of coffee for Jun.
“It’s not as delicious as your coffee, though,” Ohno mumbled.
Jun chuckled and carefully took the cup from the tray. Ohno sat down across from him with a strange expression, as if he wanted to say something very important.
“Am I disturbing something?” Jun asked.
“No,” Ohno shook his head. “I’m glad you came.”
Ohno seemed restless, but he tried to act normally and when Jun said that he needed to go, the man grabbed his wrist. It was the first physical contact Jun had with Ohno after the incident three months ago. He had just realized that Ohno was stronger than he looked; his grip around Jun’s wrist proved it.
“Ohno-san?” Jun looked at their hands and at Ohno’s eyes.
“Sorry,” he let go of Jun’s hand and mumbled that it was already late and Jun needed to go home.
Jun was half-way crossing the dark gallery when he felt Ohno’s hand grabbed his wrist again and pulled him closer and before he knew it, Ohno’s lips were on his. He didn’t dare to move; perhaps he had been waiting for this, because he was a coward for not be able to take an initiative, no matter how much he had wanted to kiss Ohno before this.
The time seemed to stop moving as they kissed. The crowded outside the gallery was muted, the hot temperature didn’t really matter, all Jun cared for was Ohno’s soft lips. The man broke the kiss and looked at Jun with a guilty gaze.
“Jun-kun, I’m…”
“It’s alright,” Jun said quickly, afraid of what he would hear from Ohno.
“Can we see each other again?” Ohno asked.
“What do you mean? Of course, we can. I enjoy my time with you, and…” Jun lost his words all a sudden. Ohno’s face was too serene under the dim light from the outside of the gallery.
“I’m glad,” was all Ohno said.
***
Jun didn’t hear anything from the man for the next two weeks. Sakurai had no idea where the man was, but Jun somehow knew he was lying. Jun felt betrayed after what happened that night. He was looking forward to see Ohno again, he missed the man so much and this time, he admitted openly to Nino.
The answer revealed on the third week after Ohno’s disappearance. It was Nino who brought the weekly magazine.
“Maybe you’ll find the answer here,” he said, putting the magazine in front of Jun.
He confusedly took the magazine and started flipping the pages. He finally found it; a full-page picture of Ohno. Jun didn’t recognize him immediately; Ohno looked odd in a suit. Jun continued reading the article followed:
Ohno Satoshi has been hiding his identity as the artist and the owner of Free Style Gallery. The gallery has just opened its branch in Tokyo for four months and already attract attention among art observer. Despite the anonymity of the creator, Free Style is rated as the most appealing art in 2017. The mysterious artist finally revealed his identity to the public as one of Free Style customers accidentally found him in one of the beaches in Nagano - creating the same painting style like what he saw in the gallery.
Speculation about Ohno’s identity has been rolling for some times and now his admirers should be happy, knowing that the artist is really exist. Ohno delivered a short speech on his first press conference, including his preference to stay hidden. But now, maybe it’s hard for him to stay away from the spot light, given the fact that his arts have been gaining more popularity…
Jun stopped reading; he had guessed that Ohno might be the artist. It was too fishy that he could work anytime he wanted and it was obvious that he knew too much about arts compared to ordinary people. But now, he felt there was something sharp stabbed his chest as he found out Ohno’s real identity from the media instead of the artist himself.
Jun felt that Ohno was very distance now, someone who was out of Jun’s reach. He once again looked at Ohno’s picture; his smart casual suit shaped a different image. It wasn’t a fancy outfit - only a white shirt and a black jacket - yet they showed the Ohno Jun never knew. The man with worn out T-shirt was gone, replaced by the artist with qualified talent.
He was angry at himself; why didn’t he confirm his suspicion? Perhaps because half of him wished that Ohno wasn’t the painter he had been admiring for too long. It was such a weird coincidence that Jun met Ohno in such circumstances. He had been rejecting his feelings, he had keeping his distance with Ohno, and now, it was too late. There was no way for him to meet Ohno again.
“J?” Nino’s voice seemed so far for Jun.
“Let’s go back to work, Nino,” Jun replied, confusingly carried the magazine to the kitchen.
“Don’t you want to talk to him?” Nino asked.
“There’s nothing I can talk with him. He’s a public figure now.”
“So, what if he’s a public figure?”
Jun heaved a deep sigh, “Nino, it’s over, let’s consider that I never met him.”
Nino shook his head, but said nothing in return, he left Jun in the kitchen and let him drown in his own thoughts. Jun didn’t want to think about Ohno right now, it was a weird feeling - Ohno was just an ordinary guy in his eyes - but now, he turned to a person Jun never knew.
Jun avoided talking about Ohno with Nino and Aiba; he was glad that they cooperated by not mentioning the artist’s name in front of him. He tried hard not to take a look at Ohno’s paintings on the shop’s wall, but it was nearly impossible.
Nino half-heartedly suggested that he needed a holiday, perhaps outside of Tokyo or even overseas. But Jun wasn’t in the mood to travel, all he wanted was staying away from the thoughts of Ohno - which was clearly failed. The kiss Ohno gave him inside the dark gallery kept on appearing inside Jun’s mind and he would do anything to turn back the time, just for that particular moment.
Ohno’s muscular arms, Ohno’s innocent smile, Ohno’s random joke - they were just too beautiful to forget. He missed the artist; but he had no guts to find where he was. Jun had been turning his phone off since he read the article, he ignored Sakurai’s call to their shop (Nino was the one who picked it up).
Two weeks had passed and Jun was in a mess.
“J, you made the wrong flavor,” Nino’s voice woke him up from his day dreaming.
“Sorry, Nino. I’ll make the new one,” Jun said, taking another glass, but Nino caught his hand.
“Let me handle it.”
Jun was about to refuse, but when he saw Nino’s face, he decided to obey his friend. He loosened his apron and left the shop towards nearby park. He finally turned on his phone, thinking that maybe Sakurai had given up in giving him phone calls on Ohno’s behalf.
The sound from unopened notification welcomed Jun as he turned his phone on. Uncounted miscalled from unknown numbers was displayed on the call log screen. He checked his emails and stopped when he found a new address. Jun clicked it open and as expected, it was from Ohno. Half of him wanted to ignore it, but he read it anyway.
Jun-kun, I hope this email finds you well,
First of all, let me apologize for hiding who I really am. I didn’t mean to lie to you. I wish I could tell you before you found out from somewhere else.
I’m suck at communicating with people and always try to stay away from the spotlight as best as I could. I painted for my own pleasure, if it wasn’t for Sho-kun, I wouldn’t have published my paintings. I wasn’t looking for popularity, but the world moved the opposite way from what I planned. I’ve been hiding and avoiding people, but when I met you, I found the different side of me. You’re so easy to talk with and you laughed on my unfunny jokes. Meeting you has become something I’m looking forward to. Do you remember when I said you have pretty eyes - that was the first time for me to compliment someone.
I was afraid that if I tell you who I am, you’ll leave me. I didn’t dare to confess my feelings because I felt that I’m no good to you. You must have realized that I like you so much, more than any artworks in this world. It sounds pathetic and childish, I hate myself for being such a coward. I wish confessing is as easy as moving the brushes over the canvas.
I’ve been trying to reach you since that article came out, I’d do anything to explain everything to you. Please, give me one more chance.
I’m dying to see you again.
I’m waiting for your reply.
Satoshi
Jun read the email once again in a slower pace, catching every word Ohno had written. Somehow, the confession seemed unreal. Ohno’s sentences were straight to the point and they encouraged Jun to meet with the artist as soon as he could.
He finally realized how much he missed Ohno, no matter how hard he tried to pretend that their unnamed relationship never existed and meaningless.
Jun needed a few days to reply Ohno’s email; he just couldn’t find the right words to write. At the end, he only wrote short reply and asked where and when they could meet. Ohno didn’t reply, instead he called Jun on Thursday night, when he, Aiba and Nino had finished cleaning the shop.
He excused himself upstairs to receipt the phone call, closed the door behind him and pushed the answer button with trembling fingers.
“Jun-kun,” Ohno said, replacing the greeting.
Jun couldn’t answer, he didn’t know what to say.
“Are you there?” Ohno asked after a minute of silence.
“How are you, Ohno-san?” he finally spoke.
“I’m fine, thanks to Sho-kun. By the way, thank you for replying to my email.”
“I missed you,” Jun said. He couldn’t afford to have more chit chat with Ohno, he just wanted to meet the artist and talk face to face with him. “Tell me where and when can I meet you? I’ll go. I don’t care if you’re in the northern part of Hokkaido or in the end of the globe, I’ll go to find you.”
“Jun-kun, I’m not going anywhere. Sho-kun will pick you up and drive you to my place, if that’s okay with you.”
“You’re so unfair, I was ready to hate you and blame you…”
“I deserve it,” Ohno inhaled a deep breath. “Sho-kun will be at your shop on Sunday morning. Is that fine?”
“Okay,” Jun answered with a whisper. He felt hopeless and powerless as he heard Ohno’s voice. Since when he fell for the artist? He couldn’t tell, when he realized it, he had fallen for Ohno - even his worn-out T-shirt turned out to be lovely.
***
Sakurai picked him up at eight on Sunday morning. Jun had explained to Nino that he needed to take a day off on Sunday.
“Go, chase your charming artist,” Nino said with a wide smile as Jun mentioned his intention. “At least, I don’t need to deal with clumsy J anymore, once he’s done with his love saga.”
Sakurai told Jun how Ohno dealt with the sudden change of situation for this past month.
“He hates publication,” Sakurai said. “He has agreed to hold an exhibition next two months; but denied to appear in media for the time being because he needs to concentrate on the preparation. He likes it when people just ignore him.”
“Ohno-san said he published his paintings because of you,” Jun cited what Ohno wrote in his email.
“We’re friends since we were kids. He’s so talented and it would be a waste if he just kept those paintings for himself. He agreed to open a gallery in Nagano and it turned out to be successful. Long story short, we decided to open another branch in Tokyo,” Sakurai explained, a nostalgic expression crossed his face.
“Where is he now?” Jun asked when Sakurai entered the high way.
“Kamakura,” the man replied. “He loves the town and nobody makes a fuss about him being an artist there.”
Jun looked outside the window, to the buildings they passed by. Kamakura was only an hour and a half from Tokyo by train, yet it felt so far. Sho mentioned that Ohno needed some time to be alone for his upcoming exhibition, it meant he didn’t want any visitors - perhaps including Jun.
His thoughts must have been reflected on his face as Sakurai spoke.
“Don’t worry, he doesn’t plan to stay permanently there. Once he can handle the situation, he’ll be back to Tokyo.”
Jun nodded and managed to flash a smile to Sakurai. He admired Sakurai’s devotion to his friend; perhaps just like what Nino did to Jun.
They didn’t talk much for the rest of the trip; Jun didn’t know what he should say to Ohno - well, they didn’t officially engage in a relationship after all or maybe they did - Jun couldn’t tell.
Sakurai’s car stopped in front of a traditional Japanese house which located rather far from the main street of Kamakura town. Jun got off and followed Sakurai to the front door; he entered the house without knocking and gestured to Jun to go in.
“He’s on the back veranda, waiting for you. I’ll leave soon, there are many things I need to take care,” Sakurai said, showing the corridor towards the back veranda to Jun.
Jun stepped slowly, trying not to make any sound, but his footstep seemed too loud over the wooden floor. Ohno was sitting on the tatami; he wore a nice dark blue kimono with beige obi around his waist. His hair had grown longer compared to the last time they met. He turned around as he heard Jun’s steps; their eyes met and Jun froze.
Ohno wasn’t the same man Jun had known, he looked different - someone in the upper class. For long minutes, all Jun could do was starring to those shady eyes until Ohno broke the silent.
“It’s been a while, Jun-kun.”
Jun gulped, not knowing what to say. Ohno rose from the floor and approached him, taking Jun’s hand and gripped it. “I’m sorry,” he said.
The rush of memories flooded Jun’s mind; the time when Ohno accidentally dropped the heavy paint can over his foot. The time when they talked about arts endlessly; the time when Ohno looked deep into his eyes; the time when he kissed Jun inside the dark gallery.
Jun couldn’t find the proper words to answer the artist. He wasn’t ready for this new Ohno. He used to be a clumsy guy with worn-out T-shirts instead of an artist who wore an expensive kimono.
They looked at each other’s eyes for long enough; Jun finally gave up and averted his gaze away from Ohno.
“Did you feel sorry for lying to me and everybody else who thought that you never exsist?” Jun finally found his voice.
Ohno smiled, “I’m sorry for breaking your toe.”
Jun bit his lower lip, refraining himself from saying the things in his mind. Ohno leaned closer and kissed him; the pleasant warmth spread to his entire body as Ohno’s lips touched his. It was something Jun had been dreamed for the past month. He kissed Ohno back, pouring all of his longing through their touching lips. It felt so good that he wished the kiss never ended.
Ohno softly pushed him to the wooden floor and he towered Jun as both of them lie down on the tatami.
“You’ll break my bones again,” Jun whispered.
“But not your heart,” Ohno replied. Their nose was touching and Jun could feel Ohno’s breaths against his skin. The talk could wait, he grabbed the collar of Ohno’s kimono and kissed the man’s lips again as if there was no tomorrow.
It was what he really wanted, the warmth of Ohno’s skin against his, the demanding kiss from the artist which was enough to make him faint.
“Would you become my date?” Ohno asked as they broke the kiss.
“I already did,” Jun replied, letting Ohno brush his hair through his fingers.
They were eager to spend the rest of Sunday by cuddling and kissing, but it could wait. They needed to talk and made clear of everything first.
Ohno had ordered lunch from nearby sushi restaurant; the menu consisted all of Jun’s favorite.
“I called Nino yesterday, asking him about your favorite food,” Ohno explained when Jun made a questioning look.
They had lunch and talked about everything afterward.
Ohno would be busy for the upcoming two months to prepare the exhibition and he told Jun that he needed to stay in Kamakura to concentrate. Jun jokingly said that he would stay there with Ohno to disturb him.
After finishing their lunch, Ohno showed the newest painting he was working on. It was a huge canvas; the painting was still far from finish, though. They returned to the back veranda while watching the maple trees which changed color. Ohno held Jun’s hand as if afraid that Jun would disappear, they kissed again, slower this time. The kiss had erased every doubt in Jun’s heart, he was in love with Ohno - so deeply.
***
Two months later
“He needs to learn public speaking,” Nino said to Jun.
They attended the opening of Ohno’s exhibition in the second week of November. The artist had just finished delivered a short speech on the first day of his art exhibition along with pers conference. Jun, Nino, and Aiba were there as honorable guests, they would be the first people on the exhibition.
“His arts have already spoken for him,” Jun replied.
Seeing Ohno on stage in another kimono had made Jun’s heart flutter to no end. He was so proud to watch the man he loved finally able to share his arts openly to the world. He waited on the backstage instead of following Nino and Aiba to the exhibition hall.
“Great work, Ohno-sensei,” Jun said when Ohno climbed down the stairs.
“Thanks,” Ohno smiled. “But I still need to learn how to handle my nervousness in public.”
“You’ll get used to it,” Jun approached the man and grabbed his hand.
“Let’s go somewhere quiet,” Ohno said, leading the way.
“Wait, how about the exhibition?”
“They’re here to see my artworks, not me,” Ohno said, guiding Jun to the exit of the hall, towards the parking area where Sakurai was waiting.
“Have fun,” Sakurai said, throwing the car key to Ohno.
“Thanks, Sho-kun.”
“You’ve planned it, I can’t believe it, sensei,” Jun chuckled, but there was no way to complain.
“Be my guest,” Ohno said, gesturing to Jun to get it. They left the exhibition hall towards the place where they could be alone, to the place where Ohno was just an ordinary man, the place where Jun could own Ohno for himself.
END
a.n : It’s been a year since I wrote my last Juntoshi fic. Actually, I only planned to write a short one shot this time, but it turned out a little bit longer. I hope you still enjoy this piece of Jun/Ohno saga.
this is how I imagined Ohno in kimono.
this is one of James Dean's paintings.