Bitter Sweet Symphony..
I havent really felt like writing anything the past few days. I guess it has something to do with the fact that I havent spoken with Josh. DAMNIT. Why did I think that everything was actually getting better? I mean, I know we arent together, and it would be TO GOOD TO BE TRUE if he actually kept talking to me on a daily basis. I thought everything was going so great, and we were going to end up back together. I though too soon.
I cant help but wonder if something would have been a little different, if I didnt miss him on Friday morning when he tried to talk to me. Maybe we would have talked for awhile, and made plans to see eachother this last weekend. Maybe something would have clicked. But, maybe it wouldnt have. Maybe it would have just been like any other day. A conversation full of "to good to be trues" and then he would be off to do his own thing.
I cant help but think of the positive things I missed out on, though.
I spent my day rearranging my room, and cleaning up after myself. I like the room this way alot better now, and its different than I've had it before. Hopefully I can get some sleep tonight and get up early tomorrow.. and hey.. maybe I will have a life!! *gasp*
My mom is finally getting the money from the insurance company to have our roof fixed from the hurricane damage. We know the guy thats going to do the work for us, and he is bringing this guy named Josh to help him. I've known this Josh for a long ass time, and I'm sorry to say it, but he is HOTTNESS. lol. I worked with him at the game room in the mall last year, and he is so cool. They came over tonight to give my mom the estimate, and I didnt know Josh was here too. I came flying out of the room, to get Hopper, because he was barking at them, while they were trying to talk. There he was, standing in the corner, and he was the reason Hopper was barking. lol. I said "you've gotta sit down, your making him nervous Josh". RAWR. lol. I should be ashamed of myself, checking out the guy who will be here working for a couple of weeks. oorrrr.. should I be ashamed? lol. HOLLERRRR. lmao.
Anyways, sorry I havent been writing.. just a little down in the dumps. :( I catch myself looking at all the cars while I'm outside smoking, hoping one of them will pull into the drive way, open the passenger side door, and out will pop my Josh. I am so fuckin' pitiful. Someone put me out of my misery.
I cant help but wonder if something would have been a little different, if I didnt miss him on Friday morning when he tried to talk to me. Maybe we would have talked for awhile, and made plans to see eachother this last weekend. Maybe something would have clicked. But, maybe it wouldnt have. Maybe it would have just been like any other day. A conversation full of "to good to be trues" and then he would be off to do his own thing.
I cant help but think of the positive things I missed out on, though.
I spent my day rearranging my room, and cleaning up after myself. I like the room this way alot better now, and its different than I've had it before. Hopefully I can get some sleep tonight and get up early tomorrow.. and hey.. maybe I will have a life!! *gasp*
My mom is finally getting the money from the insurance company to have our roof fixed from the hurricane damage. We know the guy thats going to do the work for us, and he is bringing this guy named Josh to help him. I've known this Josh for a long ass time, and I'm sorry to say it, but he is HOTTNESS. lol. I worked with him at the game room in the mall last year, and he is so cool. They came over tonight to give my mom the estimate, and I didnt know Josh was here too. I came flying out of the room, to get Hopper, because he was barking at them, while they were trying to talk. There he was, standing in the corner, and he was the reason Hopper was barking. lol. I said "you've gotta sit down, your making him nervous Josh". RAWR. lol. I should be ashamed of myself, checking out the guy who will be here working for a couple of weeks. oorrrr.. should I be ashamed? lol. HOLLERRRR. lmao.
Anyways, sorry I havent been writing.. just a little down in the dumps. :( I catch myself looking at all the cars while I'm outside smoking, hoping one of them will pull into the drive way, open the passenger side door, and out will pop my Josh. I am so fuckin' pitiful. Someone put me out of my misery.