Just For You

Mar 23, 2017 19:14

Title : Just For You
Pairing : a little Yama (Sho's centric)
Length : one-shot
Rating : G
Genre : fluff, angst(?) *I'm not sure what genre this one, gomen m_ _m
Warning : un-betaed, it would be so much mistake in grammar and wrong words. I'm really sorry m_ _m
Summary : Sho back to his old apartment

--

“Tadaima…” I mumbled as the door opened by me. I step inside the apatement. My old apartment.

No… it is… our apartment.

I wonder why all this time I can’t come here. The only place where we share same memories. Old and new memories. And trying to figure our future dreams while built it together.

Maybe because all those memories that my feet can’t bring me here until now. I wonder…

“Hatchuuu!!” I sneezed. My nose feel so itchy. Ah… of course. This apartment, no one who clean this place. Of course the dust is everywhere.

“Mou… and now I have to clean all of these…” I mumbling again.

Today is my day of. And my mind keep thinking about him.

The way his smile… I miss him.

The way he laughed so hard when we are together… I really miss it.

His fragrant and his warm and gentle hand… I want to feel it again.

But there are nothing left. It is only this apartment and our memories inside this place.

Nothing left…

I remember it clearly, the day when I found out his misery. With the pain that he suffered. All these times… he keep it as secret from me. Never told me even once. He keep smiling. Never showed me his true face when he hold back all those pain with himself.

“Why you didn’t tell me, Satoshi? Why?!” I keep asking him without notice my voice already raised at him. But he keep his calmness while drink his tea.

“No way I can told you about this.”

“But… but I’m your partner life. I’m your husband, Satoshi!”

He look at me with his smile. “I just want to spend my life without worrying such those things. I don’t want my dearest person think
“poor you” to me. I don’t like that,” he said.

“But-”

“Can we didn’t talk about it? Can we spend all the rest of my life together in happy and beautiful way? Like we always do?” he suddenly cut me and asked those questions. His eyes looking at the window but I’m sure he looking so far away from what I know.

“Satoshi…” I call his name. my voice become more gentle and soft now. I feel so guilty to never knew about him so much for all these time we being together.

“Can we, Sho-chan?” he asked again. This time, he turn around to me with his teary eyes.
I gulped.

“Yes… we can,” I said as I sit beside him and hug him. Tightly. I don’t want the death separate us. No…

“We will life our live with happy ever after. We will… I promise,”

After he gone, I didn’t have any courage to live in this apartment. So I live at another place. I choose my parents house for awhile. Left all about him behind me without even brave to turn around. Lucky me, my family didn’t asking much about my circumstances.

Then someday, I realize that what I’ve done can’t make him back. No… nothing can make him back to me. Even worse, all what I’ve done it only make me miss him too much. It burden me. It is so hurt.

“You can’t forget about people you love. It only make you remember and miss them so much than you know,” I remember Aiba said that to me when I asked him about my mind.

“But… what should I do? I even… can’t meet him again…”

“Then… just remember about him.”

“Why? It only make me feel sick.”

“Because you didn’t want to forget about him,” he look at me with a gentle eyes.

“Didn’t want to… forget?” I repeat him.

“Um. If you want to forget you will not do these. You’ll destroy all about him. Sell all of his stuff. Maybe even you will burn all your pictures with him. But see?” he pointed to my phone. “You even still set your phone wallpaper with you and his face. What should we call it if not want to forget?” he said again.

Almost done. This apartment almost clean. It is only the bedroom left.

Just when I opened the door, the dust once again make me sneezing a lot. I wonder if I can’t stop.

Then I heard some giggled

“Hihihi… you always sneezing like that Sho-chan…”

I turn around. I think I heard someone. And I think I really know that voice everywhere I would be.

But there is no one, of course.

“I hope you will life in happy and have fun for the rest of your life.”

I heard him again. This time I smiled.

Yes… I will, Satoshi. I will…

Just for you, I will…

fanfic, g:fluff, arashi, g:angst, r:g, yama

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