scum, fun and mum
Last night was very cool. I met with Rory and just told him everything that was bothering me. His advice was sometimes hypocritical but as he said, the best councellors are hypcrites. I didn't think he could help me but he really did. I made the descision to just trust him and caz, no one else. Thats the way it used to be, before we all fell out, and ever since rory and i haven't been talking, my life has slowly fallen apart. I am glad I have him back because he does mean a lot to me. Anyway, I ended up buying alcohol and we invited martyn out. The only problem was Alice, the contemptous so and so who just doesn't believe in having fun. She basically had to work and we couldn't ask her to look after thomas so having rory over was the only option. Martyn asked her and I quote:
"I am not allowed, she won't let me"
I am sorry but that, for me, just illustrates the power she has over him. I mean, he is 24 a grown man and has a child of his own and he sounded like he was 15! Thats the effect she has on people. And thats half the reason why we are on this break. Anyway after much yelling on my part, martyn took thomas out with us and decided not to get drunk. He met my brother, Sam on the way out because sam had been thrown out by his mother. A common thing I can assure you. So with three bottles of Lambrini (it was all we could afford) we all got pissed and had a lovely time. I spoke to rory about quite a lot of things and i think i made him feel ok about everything that has happened between us. I also nade it quite clear i can see straight past that mask of his which, i found, he was quite suprised at, well I am a hypocrite, aren't I? we also ended up speaking to barnes and we are all going for a piss up on thursday at uni parks. I am meeting cazzy tomorrow and so i shall be informing her. It would be so cool tp get everyone together again.
Not much has happened today. I woke up with one hum-dinger of a hangover and we met sam again. we didn't do much because he had to go, but i saw him and it was fun. I wasn't very well in the morning and was in a lot of pain. Thomas has been a nightmare all day and won't stop screaming. Its doing my head in I think he may be teething soon. That should be fun to say the least. Alice offered to look after him tonight but we said no. I am getting fed up with her looking after him all the time i feel like i am not his mother, she is. I didn't mind at first but now she is just getting out of hand. Naturally martyn won't say anything though because he is a girl. More specifically he is a mummys girl. And thomas' little sister. He says he is going to change but he isn't even making the effort anymore. I am so tired of being his mother, damnit!
I spent the day with Paul yesterday and we had a very concerning conversation. He asked me to leave martyn and i said i would only ever leave martyn for someone else if it was serious and he would be a good dad to thomas. to quote him:
"well obviously i would care for him but i would allow him to ruin my life"
so kids, todays topic is ! men are scum. blouse-wearing-lying-cheating-feminine-mother-loving scum.
there, i just saved you a lifetime of heartbreak.
"I am not allowed, she won't let me"
I am sorry but that, for me, just illustrates the power she has over him. I mean, he is 24 a grown man and has a child of his own and he sounded like he was 15! Thats the effect she has on people. And thats half the reason why we are on this break. Anyway after much yelling on my part, martyn took thomas out with us and decided not to get drunk. He met my brother, Sam on the way out because sam had been thrown out by his mother. A common thing I can assure you. So with three bottles of Lambrini (it was all we could afford) we all got pissed and had a lovely time. I spoke to rory about quite a lot of things and i think i made him feel ok about everything that has happened between us. I also nade it quite clear i can see straight past that mask of his which, i found, he was quite suprised at, well I am a hypocrite, aren't I? we also ended up speaking to barnes and we are all going for a piss up on thursday at uni parks. I am meeting cazzy tomorrow and so i shall be informing her. It would be so cool tp get everyone together again.
Not much has happened today. I woke up with one hum-dinger of a hangover and we met sam again. we didn't do much because he had to go, but i saw him and it was fun. I wasn't very well in the morning and was in a lot of pain. Thomas has been a nightmare all day and won't stop screaming. Its doing my head in I think he may be teething soon. That should be fun to say the least. Alice offered to look after him tonight but we said no. I am getting fed up with her looking after him all the time i feel like i am not his mother, she is. I didn't mind at first but now she is just getting out of hand. Naturally martyn won't say anything though because he is a girl. More specifically he is a mummys girl. And thomas' little sister. He says he is going to change but he isn't even making the effort anymore. I am so tired of being his mother, damnit!
I spent the day with Paul yesterday and we had a very concerning conversation. He asked me to leave martyn and i said i would only ever leave martyn for someone else if it was serious and he would be a good dad to thomas. to quote him:
"well obviously i would care for him but i would allow him to ruin my life"
so kids, todays topic is ! men are scum. blouse-wearing-lying-cheating-feminine-mother-loving scum.
there, i just saved you a lifetime of heartbreak.