Fanfic: Aliens
Title: Aliens
Author: yume16
Disclaimer: I don't own people, but the crap my mind sprouts.
Beta: -
Pairing(s): NEWS (Tegoshige, Koyashige because I ship them hard, Tegomass, TegoNEWS, MassuKoyaShige, KoyaTego...)
Rating: PG-13
Genre: crack
Warnings: Basically it is PG-13, but this is NEWS. I am wavering between PG to NC-17, language
Summary: Tegoshi needs Shige's help.
Author Notes: It's a stupid fic, but I imagined what would happen if Tegoshi wanted to write something and this happened. Guilty as charged.
Aliens
With Tegoshi you had to be prepared for everything. Shige had learned that a long time ago.
"I've been thinking about writing something. How does one start?" The voice was way too cheerful and Shige blearily looked at the alarm on his bedside table that told him it was 3 am and Tegoshi deserved to be strangled.
"It's fucking 3 am in the good damn morning."
"I wouldn't exactly start my story off like that, but if you insist."
The idea of Tegoshi writing a story was perplexing enough as it was. Who could imagine the other sitting still for more than an hour and just think and type? Shige shook his head at the image.
"Why don't you go out and take a jog? I am sure it will tire you out."
"I am not tired. I don't want to sleep. I want to write."
Shige groaned into his pillow.
"But I am tired."
"What's the use of a writer friend if I can't ask for help?"
"You could still ask tomorrow.
"Shige~" Tegoshi whined. "You are such a great writer. There isn't anyone better I could ask. I don't want my first attempt to be bad and I know if you just help me a little, there is no way it won't be great."
One had to give it to Tegoshi. He knew exactly how to flatter someone. Shige wasn't even completely sure the other had really read all his books.
"Please Shige-sensei, help me."
"I guess I can help you a little."
"I knew I could count on you."
Shige knew he would regret this in the morning as he sat up in his bed.
"Do you have an idea for the story?"
"Roughly."
"Take a piece of paper and write down what I tell you."
"Really?"
"I am not going to repeat myself. It's late or well, early."
"Okay, I got it."
"First, decided what kind of story you are going to write. Funny, sad, romantic? That kind of stuff. Then plan your story. Think in three parts: Introduction, Climax and End. The introduction introduces your characters, the initial problem and the direction it will develop into. You go from there and build towards the climax bit by bit. You have to be careful though. If you jump right to the climax the characters will look undeveloped und the behaviour unrealistic, but if you draw it out too long, the reader will get bored and lose interest in the story altogether. Add as many twists as you want, but don't forget it needs to be comprehensible. Don't make two enemies suddenly marry and have hookers abduct the groom."
Tegoshi snickered.
"I think that would make a rather interesting story."
Shige continued unerringly.
"Make the climax something that fits the story. It is called climax for a reason and should be the point the tension is the highest. A confrontation, a confession, a life-changing event; the climax is the reason why the story is worth telling. With stories the goal shouldn't be the most important, but the way to the end. A great end can't make up for a sucky introduction or climax. This is a personal preference, but don't draw an ending out. When everything is said and done, it is fine to end the story. Just like with all the other parts should the end fit together with the rest of the story and be a believable conclusion to everything that has happened."
"Wait, can you repeat all that? I got lost along the introduction part."
"You are kidding me, aren't you?" Shige's voice jumped up a notch too high and made it squeak.
"I didn't know you could hit such a high note."
"Tegoshi..." Shige said dangerously.
"I got everything. Cool down, hot shot."
"Brat."
"The sexiest and charming on the planet."
"Only half that confidence would be enough."
"It's alright to have confidence where it is justified."
Shige massaged his tired eyes. He was too exhausted for so much Tegoshi.
"Anyway, plan your characters well and do your research. If you use half-truths, it can be annoying."
"Don't you think that is way too much planning?"
"Only if everything fits together, it will be a believable story. I am done for tonight. Just try. Goodnight."
"Shige!"
Slumping into his pillows, he switched off his phone and threw it somewhere.
"You look grumpy." Koyama sat down next to Shige in their dressing room the same morning. They had to do an interview for Duet.
"Tegoshi."
No further explanations needed.
"I am sure you did great." Koyama soothed and opened Shige's bento for him and put the chopsticks into his hands. "Food will make everything better."
It was Koyama and it was just so like him that Shige started eating without further thinking about whether he was really hungry or not.
"I did it." Tegoshi chipper entered the dressing room and waved some DinA4 pages in the air.
"What did you do?" Koyama asked interestedly.
"I wrote a story."
"You did what?" Massu asked and stared at Tegoshi.
"I wrote a story!"
"I think something is wrong with my ears. Tegoshi is saying very Shige-like things." Massu rubbed his ears and looked suspiciously at his bento. Was there anything in it that manipulated hearing?
"You two must have worked hard." Koyama said after putting the pieces together.
"Of course." Tegoshi beamed, snatched Shige's bento away and held the papers under his nose.
Resigned, Shige took them.
"You seriously stared off with 'It's fucking 3 am in the good damn morning'?"
"You told me to."
Muttering to himself, Shige continued reading.
Massu and Koyama watched closely for his reaction. Shige's face went from looking tired to perplexed to suspicious to incredulous.
"You think a story" Shige started off slowly "Where NEWS get abducted by aliens at 3 am and where in the middle of it Koyama gives me a blowjob and all of us get pregnant is a well developed, believable and realistic story?"
"I gave a blowjob?" Koyama looked confused.
"In the story you did." Shige confirmed. "Oh my god, I helped write porn, bad porn."
"It's not bad porn at all! I followed all your advices."
"You did not!"
"Look, I wanted to send NEWS on an adventure and after Massu made me watch a movie about aliens, it seemed like an interesting idea."
"I am at fault? I am so sorry!" Massu looked truly appalled.
"That doesn't explain the blowjob. Moreover, making me say..." Shige trailed off and then cleared his throat. "Whatever."
"You said every story needed a climax." Tegoshi said innocently. Too innocently, for it to be real.
Shige groaned.
"Not that kind of climax!"
"And I thought you would be rather vocal during sex. Telling Keii-chan he has a great mouth seemed fitting. Moreover, I was being gracious. I was really hard pressed and only gave up the blowjob to you, because you helped me write."
"You have an interesting way of saying thanks." Massu said flatly on Shige's behalf, who seemed utterly speechless.
"Yeah well, who wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of Koyama's mouth?" Tegoshi said easily. Decidedly, Koyama pushed his bento back.
"Why?" The person in question finally squawked.
"Have you ever watched yourself eat an éclair? Your blowjobs are awesome."
"I have never done it. How would you know?" Koyama looked at them seriously. "I really haven't."
"I know. No way, I would have missed that." Shige said and massaged his temple as he scanned the story again.
"Oh lala." Tegoshi made catcalls and Shige sent him a glare.
"Koyama can't keep a secret to save his life." He specified.
"I can keep it if I have told it to Shige." Koyama frowned at his words "I admit there is a flaw in that logic."
"Fine, we get the blowjob thing. Koyama surely will excel at it, but why are we pregnant?"
Koyama and Shige looked slightly disturbed at Massu for his acceptance.
Massu just shrugged his shoulders.
"I am around Tegoshi on more tours than you are. He has already fantasized about all three of us."
“You haven’t.” While Shige said it, he realized he wasn’t exactly surprised after all.
“Well, who wouldn’t? Koyama would do a blowjob to die for. I and Shige could jerk each other off dirty and hurriedly behind a costume rack and damn, I want to fuck Massu.”
“Why me?”
Instead of answering, Tegoshi made grabby hands for Massu’s butt. The other squeaked
“Just imagining all those muscles!”
“That still doesn’t explain why we are all pregnant!” Koyama said loudly to distract Tegoshi enough for Massu to save his ass.
“Because we got abducted by aliens, of course. Shige said to make it believable.”
“I don’t see how that is connected.” Shige said and placed the papers on the table.
“It always happens. Aliens do experiments on humans and then they get pregnant. Have you never played Sims?”
They stared mutely at Tegoshi.
“What?”
“Maybe you should visit a course for creative writing.” Koyama proposed.
“Well, no one can say he wasn’t creative.” Shige conceded.
“And I think we three should have a threesome without Tegoshi.” Massu said decidedly.
“Right. What?” Koyama stared puzzled at Massu. “I always thought if there is one thing I can be sure about, it is that you are straight.”
Massu shrugged.
“Eh, but I want to join!”
Massu decidedly shook his head.
“You can’t have us all to yourself.”
“But I shared Shige, no Koyama, no I let Koyama and Shige do it.” Tegoshi made puppy-eyes. “I was being really nice.”
“I really think we should teach Tegoshi some manners. So when are you two free and who brings the lube?” Massu asked and flipped open his calendar.
“No!” Tegoshi yowled.
Koyama leant conspiratorial over to Shige as Tegoshi tried to bargain with Massu.
“I think Tesshi really shouldn’t have tried to grab Massu’s ass.”
“We should all keep that in mind.” Shige said and grinned.
Author: yume16
Disclaimer: I don't own people, but the crap my mind sprouts.
Beta: -
Pairing(s): NEWS (Tegoshige, Koyashige because I ship them hard, Tegomass, TegoNEWS, MassuKoyaShige, KoyaTego...)
Rating: PG-13
Genre: crack
Warnings: Basically it is PG-13, but this is NEWS. I am wavering between PG to NC-17, language
Summary: Tegoshi needs Shige's help.
Author Notes: It's a stupid fic, but I imagined what would happen if Tegoshi wanted to write something and this happened. Guilty as charged.
Aliens
With Tegoshi you had to be prepared for everything. Shige had learned that a long time ago.
"I've been thinking about writing something. How does one start?" The voice was way too cheerful and Shige blearily looked at the alarm on his bedside table that told him it was 3 am and Tegoshi deserved to be strangled.
"It's fucking 3 am in the good damn morning."
"I wouldn't exactly start my story off like that, but if you insist."
The idea of Tegoshi writing a story was perplexing enough as it was. Who could imagine the other sitting still for more than an hour and just think and type? Shige shook his head at the image.
"Why don't you go out and take a jog? I am sure it will tire you out."
"I am not tired. I don't want to sleep. I want to write."
Shige groaned into his pillow.
"But I am tired."
"What's the use of a writer friend if I can't ask for help?"
"You could still ask tomorrow.
"Shige~" Tegoshi whined. "You are such a great writer. There isn't anyone better I could ask. I don't want my first attempt to be bad and I know if you just help me a little, there is no way it won't be great."
One had to give it to Tegoshi. He knew exactly how to flatter someone. Shige wasn't even completely sure the other had really read all his books.
"Please Shige-sensei, help me."
"I guess I can help you a little."
"I knew I could count on you."
Shige knew he would regret this in the morning as he sat up in his bed.
"Do you have an idea for the story?"
"Roughly."
"Take a piece of paper and write down what I tell you."
"Really?"
"I am not going to repeat myself. It's late or well, early."
"Okay, I got it."
"First, decided what kind of story you are going to write. Funny, sad, romantic? That kind of stuff. Then plan your story. Think in three parts: Introduction, Climax and End. The introduction introduces your characters, the initial problem and the direction it will develop into. You go from there and build towards the climax bit by bit. You have to be careful though. If you jump right to the climax the characters will look undeveloped und the behaviour unrealistic, but if you draw it out too long, the reader will get bored and lose interest in the story altogether. Add as many twists as you want, but don't forget it needs to be comprehensible. Don't make two enemies suddenly marry and have hookers abduct the groom."
Tegoshi snickered.
"I think that would make a rather interesting story."
Shige continued unerringly.
"Make the climax something that fits the story. It is called climax for a reason and should be the point the tension is the highest. A confrontation, a confession, a life-changing event; the climax is the reason why the story is worth telling. With stories the goal shouldn't be the most important, but the way to the end. A great end can't make up for a sucky introduction or climax. This is a personal preference, but don't draw an ending out. When everything is said and done, it is fine to end the story. Just like with all the other parts should the end fit together with the rest of the story and be a believable conclusion to everything that has happened."
"Wait, can you repeat all that? I got lost along the introduction part."
"You are kidding me, aren't you?" Shige's voice jumped up a notch too high and made it squeak.
"I didn't know you could hit such a high note."
"Tegoshi..." Shige said dangerously.
"I got everything. Cool down, hot shot."
"Brat."
"The sexiest and charming on the planet."
"Only half that confidence would be enough."
"It's alright to have confidence where it is justified."
Shige massaged his tired eyes. He was too exhausted for so much Tegoshi.
"Anyway, plan your characters well and do your research. If you use half-truths, it can be annoying."
"Don't you think that is way too much planning?"
"Only if everything fits together, it will be a believable story. I am done for tonight. Just try. Goodnight."
"Shige!"
Slumping into his pillows, he switched off his phone and threw it somewhere.
"You look grumpy." Koyama sat down next to Shige in their dressing room the same morning. They had to do an interview for Duet.
"Tegoshi."
No further explanations needed.
"I am sure you did great." Koyama soothed and opened Shige's bento for him and put the chopsticks into his hands. "Food will make everything better."
It was Koyama and it was just so like him that Shige started eating without further thinking about whether he was really hungry or not.
"I did it." Tegoshi chipper entered the dressing room and waved some DinA4 pages in the air.
"What did you do?" Koyama asked interestedly.
"I wrote a story."
"You did what?" Massu asked and stared at Tegoshi.
"I wrote a story!"
"I think something is wrong with my ears. Tegoshi is saying very Shige-like things." Massu rubbed his ears and looked suspiciously at his bento. Was there anything in it that manipulated hearing?
"You two must have worked hard." Koyama said after putting the pieces together.
"Of course." Tegoshi beamed, snatched Shige's bento away and held the papers under his nose.
Resigned, Shige took them.
"You seriously stared off with 'It's fucking 3 am in the good damn morning'?"
"You told me to."
Muttering to himself, Shige continued reading.
Massu and Koyama watched closely for his reaction. Shige's face went from looking tired to perplexed to suspicious to incredulous.
"You think a story" Shige started off slowly "Where NEWS get abducted by aliens at 3 am and where in the middle of it Koyama gives me a blowjob and all of us get pregnant is a well developed, believable and realistic story?"
"I gave a blowjob?" Koyama looked confused.
"In the story you did." Shige confirmed. "Oh my god, I helped write porn, bad porn."
"It's not bad porn at all! I followed all your advices."
"You did not!"
"Look, I wanted to send NEWS on an adventure and after Massu made me watch a movie about aliens, it seemed like an interesting idea."
"I am at fault? I am so sorry!" Massu looked truly appalled.
"That doesn't explain the blowjob. Moreover, making me say..." Shige trailed off and then cleared his throat. "Whatever."
"You said every story needed a climax." Tegoshi said innocently. Too innocently, for it to be real.
Shige groaned.
"Not that kind of climax!"
"And I thought you would be rather vocal during sex. Telling Keii-chan he has a great mouth seemed fitting. Moreover, I was being gracious. I was really hard pressed and only gave up the blowjob to you, because you helped me write."
"You have an interesting way of saying thanks." Massu said flatly on Shige's behalf, who seemed utterly speechless.
"Yeah well, who wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of Koyama's mouth?" Tegoshi said easily. Decidedly, Koyama pushed his bento back.
"Why?" The person in question finally squawked.
"Have you ever watched yourself eat an éclair? Your blowjobs are awesome."
"I have never done it. How would you know?" Koyama looked at them seriously. "I really haven't."
"I know. No way, I would have missed that." Shige said and massaged his temple as he scanned the story again.
"Oh lala." Tegoshi made catcalls and Shige sent him a glare.
"Koyama can't keep a secret to save his life." He specified.
"I can keep it if I have told it to Shige." Koyama frowned at his words "I admit there is a flaw in that logic."
"Fine, we get the blowjob thing. Koyama surely will excel at it, but why are we pregnant?"
Koyama and Shige looked slightly disturbed at Massu for his acceptance.
Massu just shrugged his shoulders.
"I am around Tegoshi on more tours than you are. He has already fantasized about all three of us."
“You haven’t.” While Shige said it, he realized he wasn’t exactly surprised after all.
“Well, who wouldn’t? Koyama would do a blowjob to die for. I and Shige could jerk each other off dirty and hurriedly behind a costume rack and damn, I want to fuck Massu.”
“Why me?”
Instead of answering, Tegoshi made grabby hands for Massu’s butt. The other squeaked
“Just imagining all those muscles!”
“That still doesn’t explain why we are all pregnant!” Koyama said loudly to distract Tegoshi enough for Massu to save his ass.
“Because we got abducted by aliens, of course. Shige said to make it believable.”
“I don’t see how that is connected.” Shige said and placed the papers on the table.
“It always happens. Aliens do experiments on humans and then they get pregnant. Have you never played Sims?”
They stared mutely at Tegoshi.
“What?”
“Maybe you should visit a course for creative writing.” Koyama proposed.
“Well, no one can say he wasn’t creative.” Shige conceded.
“And I think we three should have a threesome without Tegoshi.” Massu said decidedly.
“Right. What?” Koyama stared puzzled at Massu. “I always thought if there is one thing I can be sure about, it is that you are straight.”
Massu shrugged.
“Eh, but I want to join!”
Massu decidedly shook his head.
“You can’t have us all to yourself.”
“But I shared Shige, no Koyama, no I let Koyama and Shige do it.” Tegoshi made puppy-eyes. “I was being really nice.”
“I really think we should teach Tegoshi some manners. So when are you two free and who brings the lube?” Massu asked and flipped open his calendar.
“No!” Tegoshi yowled.
Koyama leant conspiratorial over to Shige as Tegoshi tried to bargain with Massu.
“I think Tesshi really shouldn’t have tried to grab Massu’s ass.”
“We should all keep that in mind.” Shige said and grinned.