(no subject)
I'm starving! Despite that I just have to post about today. So at the shop, the one I volunteer at, I like any other day blushed, not for anything embarrassing or particular, only having a random conversation with Sara and this man. I'm sure I was already rosy round the cheeks before I spoke to them. Suddenly I said something awkward, like completely out of topic and he said "Oh no we are talking about ____" and noticed me red on the cheeks and said " you are turning red!" I wasn't really embarrassed on being awkward but him pointing my blushing out made me awkward...I don't think he meant it in a bad way.
What surprised me was that I dealt with it much better and didn't panic for a change! I simply shrugged it off, BUT I still have those flashbacks of the scenario going over and over in my head, which is absolutely painful. I should really praise myself. Instead, what i'm doing is thinking about all the possible future events. Putting me off seeing those people ever again. I know I can't hide.
I hate myself for worrying over something that might not happen, worrying about the future day in day out is so exhausting.
Hope I didn't bore everyone.
I have to go and eat now.
Good evening!
EDIT: I think i'm fine now. When something anxiety provoking has happened I usually feel so lost, helpless, and thousand different emotions at once. I twisted my head in a funny way today, got lazy and didn't want to go up to the bin, think I pinched a nerve, I was in such agonizing pain I could hardly move my arm for a while.