My reflection - chapter 29, Ruki/Kai, Reita/Uruha
Author: yukigafuru
Title: My reflection
Chapters:30/?
Pairing: Ruki/Kai, Uruha/Reita, Aoi/OC, Aoi/Sakito
Warnings: lots of angst, manxman love
Rating: PG-15
Genre: Angst, Romance
Disclaimer: I am not connected to the real persons. This is just a figment of my imagination and I don't make any money nor profit in any way out of this (well, except gathering your love that is).
Summary: They are successful but are they really happy? Are there shadows lurking in the dark, just waiting for a chance to come out? What is happening with Ruki and how can Kai help? And what will this challenge for the two of them bring?
Chapter 29
He was standing in the middle of the white hallway, pacing up and down, turning towards and away from the steel-like door. He'd turn, in his anxiety, chew the skin of his fingers or crack his hands, release a loud sigh, turn again and look at the unchanging red-light, try to keep from crying, turn again. It was as if he was dying inside.
And then the doors opened and Kai came out, kissed his cheek, whispered 'I love you' and vanished. A few seconds later, the red light became green and a man dressed in the same offensive white was coming out.
“We're sorry, sir. There was nothing we could do. The bleeding...”
Falling on his knees and sobbing uncontrollably, Kai's name being the only word to pierce the heart-wrenching sobs.
Ruki woke up abruptly. He was drenched in cold sweat and he was trembling. He looked frantically around him to get his bearings straight and, more importantly, to see and feel Kai. The drummer was sleeping peacefully next to him. He curled closer to the drummer, practically trying to eliminate any space between them, listening to Kai's even breaths and heartbeats. It had been just a dream. He couldn't and wouldn't go back to sleep though, not as long as there was a miniscule chance that this would turn out to be a dream...
The first rays of the morning sun were filtering through the semi-opaque dark violet curtains of their bedroom when Kai started to stir and gradually come to full awareness. It felt weird to wake up at 4-5 in the morning when there was no need for it and when he had been having a peaceful rest and dreamless sleep.
He was being almost crushed in Ruki's embrace and so he managed to ascertain the reason of his waking up at such ungodly hours. He tried to untangle himself from Ruki for a bit or just turn so that he could face the vocalist but surprisingly, he couldn't so much as budge so he was forced to endure. Maybe he could go back to sleep. But then, Ruki whispered his name. If it had been only that, Kai might have thought that the vocalist was still asleep, but Ruki continued.
“Kai? Are you awake?” And then the arms around him lost a little bit of their pressure so he could turn and face his lover.
Ruki was anxious to see his image reflected in those deep dark eyes that he could still remember getting clouded before Kai vanished. It had frightened him more than the doctor's words. They had been just so Kai...
But now, Kai was facing him and his deep eyes were helping chase away the last traces of the nightmare.
“What's wrong, Ru-chan? How come you're awake? And what about the grizzly bear hug?”
He really wasn't being a scaredy-pants. He just really needed to feel the warmth of the man he loved. So Ruki just put his hands around Kai's waist and buried his face in Kai's chest, inhaling Kai's fragrance, letting it soothe him.
Kai could sense that something was wrong. So in turn, he hugged Ruki closer to him and after allowing him a little time to calm himself, he whispered his question.
“What's wrong, Ru?”
“Just a nightmare, Kai.”
“What about?”
“You were... I was in a hospital and you came out of a door, whispered 'I love you' and then disappeared. And then the doctor let me know that... you were dead.”
“I see.”
“I don't know how to live without you, Kai. Not anymore. Not after us. Not after... I just... don't ever leave me, Kai.”
“I don't plan on going anywhere, Ruki. And I promise you that I'll never willingly leave your side and even if I'm teared away from you, I'll fight the devil himself if I have to, but I'll come back to you.”
“Thank you. I just love you so much.”
“Love you too.”
What a marvelous thing kisses are, especially the ones the two of them shared. They made you forget about everything, made all your pains and insecurities simply slip away. Nothing was left except the feel of lips upon lips, searching frantically, devouring the other. And kisses were still simply the beginning...
Kai over him, kissing a trail down his neck, torso, abdomen, his hands getting rid of the annoying objects known as pajama pants and boxers, the same hands spreading heat over each and every inch of skin they touch. Those kisses again, this time lower and lower.
He'd want to say 'I love you' every time Kai made him feel like that but not even his mind or vocal chords seemed to be listening anymore. The feelings were just too strong, the love in that simple act simply strangles everything except love out of him, and the love he feels, it just gets stronger.
A love like that, yes, they could take on the devil and win. They could take on the world and win.
Thirty minutes later, in the soft morning light, two figures were sleeping entangled with one another, to such an extent, that it was almost impossible to discern when one began and the other ended. The sheets, half covering their nudeness, half dangling helpless from the bed, were just offensive pieces of cloth masking a perfect picture. However, all coverings are merely temporary...
…...............
He had managed to get some decent sleep and that helped clear away a bit of the confusion in Uruha's mind. He had been acting foolish, of course. He knew for a fact that Reita loved him, not only as a lover but as a dear friend, someone that had been there for most of his adult life, someone he could trust entirely and give his heart too, someone he had chosen. There was no way Reita would ever purposefully betray that trust.
But that didn't mean things weren't suspicion. Reita's silence was suspicious, his promise to tell him when the time was right was suspicious, the phone call was downright unnerving, and the assumptions somehow were still firmly implanted in his head. If he didn't know it to be impossible, he'd think Reita was planning on marrying him. Preposterous, right? Two man just couldn't marry in Japan....
If Ruki were there, they'd crack this together...
He sighed loudly and then got out of bed. Reita had gone off somewhere again. Probably the kitchen. After a short trip to the bathroom, Uruha too left the bedroom. Reita was not in the kitchen but in front of the TV, playing his loved PS3 games. He was such a kid sometimes, Uruha thought. The warm, fuzzy feelings he got when watching his lover giving him a look that was surprisingly similar to a puppy dog look, did not stop him however from warning the bassist.
“I love you, but I sure hope this secret you have is worth waiting or I might just as well kill you.”
Reita abandoned his game, got up, embraced Uruha and promised:
“It is. Coffee?”
“Might as well. Don't know how I'm gonna sleep tonight though.”
Reita giggled, gave him a wink and after saying “Don't worry your pretty little head about that...” strode in the kitchen to get his lover his not-so-morning coffee.
He could have read the paper while drinking his coffee, but Uruha wasn't really the paper-reading type and there was never anything remotely interesting in the papers anyway. So he settled for the next best thing: watching Reita squirm and curse the game. To Uruha, that was always fun...
While enjoying this 'activity' the bell disturbed the relative quiet of the room.
“Uru, could you get that?”
“I wonder who it is, though. Waiting for someone?”
“Nope.”
“Ok, no mystery friend then.”
The visitor was quite unexpected indeed.
“Ryo-kun. Long time no see. It's nice to see you again.”
“Nice to see you again, Uruha-chan.” Reita laughed, Uruha remembered why he hated the brat.
“Why you...”
“Is Reita-san home?”
“He's the one playing with the video games so shouldn't he be honored with that suffix? But no, he's Reita-san.” Uruha mumbled while inviting the kid inside. “You can join him”
Ryo didn't need to be told twice. In a flash, he was next to Reita, asking him for permission to play together and then aiding the bassist in making a racket. There went a peaceful day, Uruha thought.
“I need to get some groceries. Ryo-kun, what's your favorite meal?”
“Tempura.”
“Ok, then we're having tempura for dinner. I assume you'll be staying?”
It wasn't really a question but it was nice to see the little guy practically throwing himself over Uruha because of excitement. Just before he closed the front door, he heard Ryo's exclamation, and this time it made him laugh.
“And he can cook! Wow, you're a real lucky guy, Reita-san!”
No one argued.
Two hours later, Uruha was opening the front door and assisting to the most peculiar scene. Reita was walking in circles around Ryo who just pretended not to listen.
“Come on. There has to be someone.”
As soon as Ryo spotted Uruha, he practically dashed towards him.
“Uruha-san, save me!”
“Clever kid. Ok, now what do I need to save you from?”
“He just keeps asking me about girls.”
Reita just humphed and went back to the game.
“Wanna help me in the kitchen?” Uruha asked Ryo. The boy happily agreed.
After they had taken out the ingredients, Uruha's curiosity got the best of him.
“So you're not telling Reita-san anything because there's nothing to tell or because you want to annoy him?”
“Well... but you promise you'll keep this a secret from Reita-san?”
“Promise.”
“Well, there is this cute girl that seems to like me. We talk sometimes... But...”
“But what?”
“Uruha-san, can I ask you something? Is it wrong if I don't like her? Is it horribly wrong if I like a friend instead?”
Uruha was a bit shocked at that.
“Why don't you like her? You said she was cute.”
“Well, she is, everyone says she is. I think so too, but...She wants to play things like family and dress up some dolls and well, she giggles all the time. That can be damn annoying.”
“Ok, wrong question. Let's go this way. Who do you think you like?”
“He's my best friend. We do everything together. He's the goalkeeper in our team. I can talk about anything with him.”
“I see.”
“So, what do you think?”
“Ryo-kun, you don't need to worry too much or pay attention to Reita-san there. He's as big a kid as you are. To me, it just sounds like you might be a bit confusing one sort of like with the other. You're a bit too young maybe to like a girl that way and you like your friend probably just as a friend too. Give it some time.”
“But you and Reita-san were friends before you got married, right?”
“Yeah. But it takes more than friendship to like someone that way.” Uruha decided to ignore the other part of the question.
“So how did you come to like each other? And exactly how do you like each other?”
“That's a bit too hard to explain and far too early for you to understand.”
Ryo was pouting.
“Not the 'you need to grow up a bit' speech again. Why do all adults seem to love that one?”
Uruha giggled a bit.
“Well, that's just how it is. I'll get Reita-san to ease up on the girl comments ok?”
“You're my savior.”
“Ok, now let's get this show on the road before Mr game-fanatic there decides to throw a fit.”
“He still does that? At his age?”
Uruha had to work with himself for a few minutes to stop the ensuing laughter.
“No, I was just joking.”
Cooking tempura together with a tempura-crazed kid was quite the adventure and dinner that night turned into quite an event in itself. Uruha found that he certainly would never get tired around Ryo, that is if he managed to survive it in the first place. At around eight in the evening, Ryo was on his way home.
“Hey, kid, not that I'm complaining, but what made you come in the first place?” Reita asked
Ryo seemed to grow quiet and a bit sad for a few brief moments, but it might have been just the lighting.
“Just wanted to invite you and Uruha-san to my game next week、on Thursday. You'll come, won't you?”
Uruha and Reita exchanged looks.
“Actually, we might have...”
“Please, say you'll come. I really want you there.”
Uruha answered instead.
“We promise to do our best. We want to see you kick but.”
With something that awfully resembled a squeal of happiness, Ryo had bid them goodnight and flown out the door. The two Gazette members were left with cleaning the aftermath. Half an hour later, tired, they retreated to the bedroom.
“I can certainly see why you love him, Reita. He's a wonderful kid.”
“Yeah, he is. Guess he reminds me a bit of myself when I was little.”
“You certainly loved soccer as much as him. Made me join the team too...”
“Made us closer.”
“Yeah, yeah... By the way, I promised to get you to ease up on the girl comments.”
“Why? Don't tell me he told you when he refused to talk with me. Damn!”
“Don't be a baby.”
“What did he say?”
“Promised not to tell.”
“Not fair... Ok, but then I need a consolation prize.”
“I wonder what...” Uruha replied, smiling impishly already.
“You.”
Well, they obviously were going to get a restful sleep that night. Reita had promised to get him tired again after all...
A/N: I know, I'm horribly late. one week, actually. No excuses for that. Except that last weekend I just had to write my Gackt/You oneshot. Just had too. So sorry for keeping you waiting, guys. Hope you liked this. And even though the chapter seems more of a filler, trust me, there's some important hints hiding in here. Not saying what though. HEHE evil laugh. Ok, waiting for your love, as always. hugs
Title: My reflection
Chapters:30/?
Pairing: Ruki/Kai, Uruha/Reita, Aoi/OC, Aoi/Sakito
Warnings: lots of angst, manxman love
Rating: PG-15
Genre: Angst, Romance
Disclaimer: I am not connected to the real persons. This is just a figment of my imagination and I don't make any money nor profit in any way out of this (well, except gathering your love that is).
Summary: They are successful but are they really happy? Are there shadows lurking in the dark, just waiting for a chance to come out? What is happening with Ruki and how can Kai help? And what will this challenge for the two of them bring?
Chapter 29
He was standing in the middle of the white hallway, pacing up and down, turning towards and away from the steel-like door. He'd turn, in his anxiety, chew the skin of his fingers or crack his hands, release a loud sigh, turn again and look at the unchanging red-light, try to keep from crying, turn again. It was as if he was dying inside.
And then the doors opened and Kai came out, kissed his cheek, whispered 'I love you' and vanished. A few seconds later, the red light became green and a man dressed in the same offensive white was coming out.
“We're sorry, sir. There was nothing we could do. The bleeding...”
Falling on his knees and sobbing uncontrollably, Kai's name being the only word to pierce the heart-wrenching sobs.
Ruki woke up abruptly. He was drenched in cold sweat and he was trembling. He looked frantically around him to get his bearings straight and, more importantly, to see and feel Kai. The drummer was sleeping peacefully next to him. He curled closer to the drummer, practically trying to eliminate any space between them, listening to Kai's even breaths and heartbeats. It had been just a dream. He couldn't and wouldn't go back to sleep though, not as long as there was a miniscule chance that this would turn out to be a dream...
The first rays of the morning sun were filtering through the semi-opaque dark violet curtains of their bedroom when Kai started to stir and gradually come to full awareness. It felt weird to wake up at 4-5 in the morning when there was no need for it and when he had been having a peaceful rest and dreamless sleep.
He was being almost crushed in Ruki's embrace and so he managed to ascertain the reason of his waking up at such ungodly hours. He tried to untangle himself from Ruki for a bit or just turn so that he could face the vocalist but surprisingly, he couldn't so much as budge so he was forced to endure. Maybe he could go back to sleep. But then, Ruki whispered his name. If it had been only that, Kai might have thought that the vocalist was still asleep, but Ruki continued.
“Kai? Are you awake?” And then the arms around him lost a little bit of their pressure so he could turn and face his lover.
Ruki was anxious to see his image reflected in those deep dark eyes that he could still remember getting clouded before Kai vanished. It had frightened him more than the doctor's words. They had been just so Kai...
But now, Kai was facing him and his deep eyes were helping chase away the last traces of the nightmare.
“What's wrong, Ru-chan? How come you're awake? And what about the grizzly bear hug?”
He really wasn't being a scaredy-pants. He just really needed to feel the warmth of the man he loved. So Ruki just put his hands around Kai's waist and buried his face in Kai's chest, inhaling Kai's fragrance, letting it soothe him.
Kai could sense that something was wrong. So in turn, he hugged Ruki closer to him and after allowing him a little time to calm himself, he whispered his question.
“What's wrong, Ru?”
“Just a nightmare, Kai.”
“What about?”
“You were... I was in a hospital and you came out of a door, whispered 'I love you' and then disappeared. And then the doctor let me know that... you were dead.”
“I see.”
“I don't know how to live without you, Kai. Not anymore. Not after us. Not after... I just... don't ever leave me, Kai.”
“I don't plan on going anywhere, Ruki. And I promise you that I'll never willingly leave your side and even if I'm teared away from you, I'll fight the devil himself if I have to, but I'll come back to you.”
“Thank you. I just love you so much.”
“Love you too.”
What a marvelous thing kisses are, especially the ones the two of them shared. They made you forget about everything, made all your pains and insecurities simply slip away. Nothing was left except the feel of lips upon lips, searching frantically, devouring the other. And kisses were still simply the beginning...
Kai over him, kissing a trail down his neck, torso, abdomen, his hands getting rid of the annoying objects known as pajama pants and boxers, the same hands spreading heat over each and every inch of skin they touch. Those kisses again, this time lower and lower.
He'd want to say 'I love you' every time Kai made him feel like that but not even his mind or vocal chords seemed to be listening anymore. The feelings were just too strong, the love in that simple act simply strangles everything except love out of him, and the love he feels, it just gets stronger.
A love like that, yes, they could take on the devil and win. They could take on the world and win.
Thirty minutes later, in the soft morning light, two figures were sleeping entangled with one another, to such an extent, that it was almost impossible to discern when one began and the other ended. The sheets, half covering their nudeness, half dangling helpless from the bed, were just offensive pieces of cloth masking a perfect picture. However, all coverings are merely temporary...
…...............
He had managed to get some decent sleep and that helped clear away a bit of the confusion in Uruha's mind. He had been acting foolish, of course. He knew for a fact that Reita loved him, not only as a lover but as a dear friend, someone that had been there for most of his adult life, someone he could trust entirely and give his heart too, someone he had chosen. There was no way Reita would ever purposefully betray that trust.
But that didn't mean things weren't suspicion. Reita's silence was suspicious, his promise to tell him when the time was right was suspicious, the phone call was downright unnerving, and the assumptions somehow were still firmly implanted in his head. If he didn't know it to be impossible, he'd think Reita was planning on marrying him. Preposterous, right? Two man just couldn't marry in Japan....
If Ruki were there, they'd crack this together...
He sighed loudly and then got out of bed. Reita had gone off somewhere again. Probably the kitchen. After a short trip to the bathroom, Uruha too left the bedroom. Reita was not in the kitchen but in front of the TV, playing his loved PS3 games. He was such a kid sometimes, Uruha thought. The warm, fuzzy feelings he got when watching his lover giving him a look that was surprisingly similar to a puppy dog look, did not stop him however from warning the bassist.
“I love you, but I sure hope this secret you have is worth waiting or I might just as well kill you.”
Reita abandoned his game, got up, embraced Uruha and promised:
“It is. Coffee?”
“Might as well. Don't know how I'm gonna sleep tonight though.”
Reita giggled, gave him a wink and after saying “Don't worry your pretty little head about that...” strode in the kitchen to get his lover his not-so-morning coffee.
He could have read the paper while drinking his coffee, but Uruha wasn't really the paper-reading type and there was never anything remotely interesting in the papers anyway. So he settled for the next best thing: watching Reita squirm and curse the game. To Uruha, that was always fun...
While enjoying this 'activity' the bell disturbed the relative quiet of the room.
“Uru, could you get that?”
“I wonder who it is, though. Waiting for someone?”
“Nope.”
“Ok, no mystery friend then.”
The visitor was quite unexpected indeed.
“Ryo-kun. Long time no see. It's nice to see you again.”
“Nice to see you again, Uruha-chan.” Reita laughed, Uruha remembered why he hated the brat.
“Why you...”
“Is Reita-san home?”
“He's the one playing with the video games so shouldn't he be honored with that suffix? But no, he's Reita-san.” Uruha mumbled while inviting the kid inside. “You can join him”
Ryo didn't need to be told twice. In a flash, he was next to Reita, asking him for permission to play together and then aiding the bassist in making a racket. There went a peaceful day, Uruha thought.
“I need to get some groceries. Ryo-kun, what's your favorite meal?”
“Tempura.”
“Ok, then we're having tempura for dinner. I assume you'll be staying?”
It wasn't really a question but it was nice to see the little guy practically throwing himself over Uruha because of excitement. Just before he closed the front door, he heard Ryo's exclamation, and this time it made him laugh.
“And he can cook! Wow, you're a real lucky guy, Reita-san!”
No one argued.
Two hours later, Uruha was opening the front door and assisting to the most peculiar scene. Reita was walking in circles around Ryo who just pretended not to listen.
“Come on. There has to be someone.”
As soon as Ryo spotted Uruha, he practically dashed towards him.
“Uruha-san, save me!”
“Clever kid. Ok, now what do I need to save you from?”
“He just keeps asking me about girls.”
Reita just humphed and went back to the game.
“Wanna help me in the kitchen?” Uruha asked Ryo. The boy happily agreed.
After they had taken out the ingredients, Uruha's curiosity got the best of him.
“So you're not telling Reita-san anything because there's nothing to tell or because you want to annoy him?”
“Well... but you promise you'll keep this a secret from Reita-san?”
“Promise.”
“Well, there is this cute girl that seems to like me. We talk sometimes... But...”
“But what?”
“Uruha-san, can I ask you something? Is it wrong if I don't like her? Is it horribly wrong if I like a friend instead?”
Uruha was a bit shocked at that.
“Why don't you like her? You said she was cute.”
“Well, she is, everyone says she is. I think so too, but...She wants to play things like family and dress up some dolls and well, she giggles all the time. That can be damn annoying.”
“Ok, wrong question. Let's go this way. Who do you think you like?”
“He's my best friend. We do everything together. He's the goalkeeper in our team. I can talk about anything with him.”
“I see.”
“So, what do you think?”
“Ryo-kun, you don't need to worry too much or pay attention to Reita-san there. He's as big a kid as you are. To me, it just sounds like you might be a bit confusing one sort of like with the other. You're a bit too young maybe to like a girl that way and you like your friend probably just as a friend too. Give it some time.”
“But you and Reita-san were friends before you got married, right?”
“Yeah. But it takes more than friendship to like someone that way.” Uruha decided to ignore the other part of the question.
“So how did you come to like each other? And exactly how do you like each other?”
“That's a bit too hard to explain and far too early for you to understand.”
Ryo was pouting.
“Not the 'you need to grow up a bit' speech again. Why do all adults seem to love that one?”
Uruha giggled a bit.
“Well, that's just how it is. I'll get Reita-san to ease up on the girl comments ok?”
“You're my savior.”
“Ok, now let's get this show on the road before Mr game-fanatic there decides to throw a fit.”
“He still does that? At his age?”
Uruha had to work with himself for a few minutes to stop the ensuing laughter.
“No, I was just joking.”
Cooking tempura together with a tempura-crazed kid was quite the adventure and dinner that night turned into quite an event in itself. Uruha found that he certainly would never get tired around Ryo, that is if he managed to survive it in the first place. At around eight in the evening, Ryo was on his way home.
“Hey, kid, not that I'm complaining, but what made you come in the first place?” Reita asked
Ryo seemed to grow quiet and a bit sad for a few brief moments, but it might have been just the lighting.
“Just wanted to invite you and Uruha-san to my game next week、on Thursday. You'll come, won't you?”
Uruha and Reita exchanged looks.
“Actually, we might have...”
“Please, say you'll come. I really want you there.”
Uruha answered instead.
“We promise to do our best. We want to see you kick but.”
With something that awfully resembled a squeal of happiness, Ryo had bid them goodnight and flown out the door. The two Gazette members were left with cleaning the aftermath. Half an hour later, tired, they retreated to the bedroom.
“I can certainly see why you love him, Reita. He's a wonderful kid.”
“Yeah, he is. Guess he reminds me a bit of myself when I was little.”
“You certainly loved soccer as much as him. Made me join the team too...”
“Made us closer.”
“Yeah, yeah... By the way, I promised to get you to ease up on the girl comments.”
“Why? Don't tell me he told you when he refused to talk with me. Damn!”
“Don't be a baby.”
“What did he say?”
“Promised not to tell.”
“Not fair... Ok, but then I need a consolation prize.”
“I wonder what...” Uruha replied, smiling impishly already.
“You.”
Well, they obviously were going to get a restful sleep that night. Reita had promised to get him tired again after all...
A/N: I know, I'm horribly late. one week, actually. No excuses for that. Except that last weekend I just had to write my Gackt/You oneshot. Just had too. So sorry for keeping you waiting, guys. Hope you liked this. And even though the chapter seems more of a filler, trust me, there's some important hints hiding in here. Not saying what though. HEHE evil laugh. Ok, waiting for your love, as always. hugs