Round Robin, The Formative Years: Part Three
Title: Orgasmic BOOK
Author: Elizabeth aka B.E.D.
Rated M for bad language and naughtiness.
Summary: Continuing on from Ashes stunning chapter full of WoW references and Andy tripping on skittles, what you need to know is that Andy has realized that she’s not in Kansas anymore, in fact she’s in a weird place with models eating fried eggplant, tentacles, and midgets and Nate kind of looks like Toto, doesn’t he?
Last A/N: I tried (I really did and it was hard!) to integrate all the things you bbs said you wanted to see in this chapter from Ashes’s previous chapter. You all are very sick, but I luvs you anyway.
Andy went home after the bizarre ad shoot. Nate wasn’t home yet, so even though she was still trippin from the skittles, she felt like she needed something to take the edge off, or at least bring her down. Just like in college, the answer was Tequila. Nate was a recovering alcoholic, so Andy couldn’t keep it around the apartment, or at least not in plain sight.
She went to the bathroom and pulled out an old shampoo bottle she kept hidden under the sink full of Tequila. After a few drinks, okay so she emptied the bottle, then she passed out on the bed in her clothes. Maybe tomorrow would be a better day.
The phone call she received at Six-thirty A.M. not only made Andy’s head hurt, but made her realize that it was most likely in fact not going to be a better day.
“Andrea?” Was Emily’s voice always so grating as well as British? “Where are you? Miranda wants Starbucks right away. Write this down: 6 no-foam skim lattes with extra shots, searing hot, and I mean hot! We also have another shoot today.” The red head promptly hung up.
Andy groaned, and rolled out of bed. She figured the people at Runway didn’t like the clothes she was wearing and would hate all her other clothes, so might as well wear what she had slept in. Maybe she’d start a new trend.
After standing in the long line and answering her phone every five minutes, “Yes Emily, I’m in line for the coffee.” “Yes Emily, I’m still in line.” “Emily, it’s Starbucks in New York! It’s going to be a while!”
Finally, Andy was walking in the lobby of Elias-Clarke, “I’m in the building Emily. Yes I have the Starbucks and it’s hot!”
So Andy was a little surprised as she walked up to the two desks to see Emily sipping out of a ‘I’d rather be reading Twilight’ mug. “Here’s your coffee.”
Emily rolled her eyes. “This is all for Miranda.” The red head took the 6 coffees into Miranda’s office.
Emily was particularly grumpy today, because she had woken up early and tried her new Titilating Tenticular Amazonatron Vibrator, and it had been so amazing, and she had just been right there.... and it exploded, which had been a nice feeling in itself, but now there was no boom boom. No great day in the morning! No more coming around the mountain....
But things were looking up for the red head as she brought over the BOOK. She showed it to Andy as she fondled it. “This is the BOOK. Now, it is a mock up of everything in the current issue,” Emily explained. As she continued to molest it, she moaned softly and her eyes rolled back in her head. She clenched her thighs together tightly and pressed on. “We deliver the BOOK to Miranda every night,” Emily began to rub the BOOK up against her chest as she spoke. Her cheeks were red and sweat was beginning to form on her forehead.
“As second assistant, you are suppose to wait for it, but until she decides you are not a complete psycho, I get the lovely task of waiting around for the BOOK,” Emily moaned in ecstasy.
As the red head started to walk away, the phone started ringing. Andy looked at Emily, unsure what to do. “Deal with it,” she said. “Don’t ever leave the desk for any reason. I suggest you invest in some Depends.” Emily continued down the hall, licking the BOOK’s spine.
A nervous Andy answered the phone, “Um hello this is an office... I mean Mrs. Priestly’s office.... yes it’s Miranda’s office. She’s in a meeting, can I take a message.... Yes, okay. Can you spell Calvin Klein? Oh, I guess not,” Andy said softly as she hung up the phone.
At that point Miranda came storming out of her office, pumped up on Starbucks. “Emily, it’s time to go.” (Miranda was doing that weird thing where she called the second assistant by the same name as the first. Most thought it a tactic to make new employees feel vulnerable, but really all the caffeine had begun to rot her brain and it was really hard to remember names.)
Andy prepared herself for another chaotic photo shoot, but was surprised to not see stick thin models, midgets or anything that had been present the day before. There were normal sized people dressed in cartoon character costumes. Andy watched amused as the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles passed her. She thought she caught a glimpse of He-man and She-ra over in the corner making out, which was kind of gross, since in the cartoon they were twins.
Andy turned to Miranda, and for the first time, her employer looked nervous. Before Andy could ask if she was okay, Miranda snapped at her, “Find the photographer.”
Just then a group of young people and a man dressed in a blueish suit with green hair walked up to them. “By your powers combined, I am Captain Planet!”
Andy laughed, it was Captain Planet and the Planeteers! Andy stopped laughing when Miranda gripped her arm. “Uh, Miranda... I think the photographer is over there.” She wanted to also let her employer know that she was cutting her circulation off, but Miranda looked terrified. They walked over together to the young man not dressed in a costume and fiddling with camera equipment.
They heard Captain Planet say, “Come on, let’s blow this Stalagmite stand.”
Andy wasn’t surprised that all the ‘characters’ were nerds. She was surprised that the young man leered at Miranda as they walked up to him. Miranda, still looked terrified and didn’t notice. “The client wants character from retro cartoons,” the photographer explained.
“I could go home and get my orange sweater,” Andy offered. Miranda stopped looking scared and glared at her new assistant. Andy pointed over to another corner where there were two people in Shaggy and Scooby costumes. “I could be Velma,” she tried to explain.
Miranda still looked blank.
“You know, ‘Scooby Doo, where are you?’” Andy smiled brightly.
Miranda made a decision and turned to the photographer. “I’m going to go outside and make some phone calls, Emily will stay here as she is an expert at this idiocy.” The Editor then ran out of the shoot location as quick as she could, which was amazing to do in high heels.
The sleazy photographer watched as she left. “That is one hot Cougar!”
Gross. Andy rolled her eyes. “She’s not a Cougar, she’s married.”
“That ain’t what I heard. She’s in her second marriage, and it’s on the rocks.” The photographer laughed. “Hey remember that time Shaggy and Scooby tried to eat that guy in the hotdog suit?”
Hotdogs were gross too, for many reasons.
An hour later, responding to a frantic phone call from Miranda, Andy exited the shoot location. Surprised again, she saw Miranda fending off a hug from Buzz Lightyear.
Rebuffed, the man in the costume said, “You are a sad, strange little woman, and you have my pity.” He stomped up the stairs in his boots.
As Miranda was hyperventilating, Andy helped her sit down on a street bench. “Here,” Andy suggested. “Put your head between your knees and just breathe.” It seemed even the Dragon Lady had her own kryptonite. Who would have ever thought it would be people dressed up as cartoon characters?
“Call....” Miranda took a few more deep breaths. “Call the car, it’s time to go to Lazer Park.”
Andy was already dialing the number for Miranda’s driver, but she was sure she had heard wrong. Andy flipped through the day planner Emily had prepared for her, and sure enough, there in cursive was listed Elias-Clarke Corporate Team Building exercise at Lazer Park. They were going to play Laser Tag!
In the car on the way to the Lazer Arena, Andy called Emily. She got the red head’s voice mail. After her post coital encounter with the BOOK, Emily had eaten a triple cheeseburger and a dozen crispy creme donuts, using the BOOK as a plate to lick it off. She was in a sugary orgasmic haze and wouldn’t wake up until much later when it was time to go find that bitch she had to kill, Andren on WoW.
They arrived at Lazer Park, Andy trying frantically to keep up with Miranda into the building. As soon as they entered the main room, the air grew cold. Irv Ravitz was gearing up and entire group of employees knew Miranda had a score to settle. The rumor mill around the water cooler said that old Irv was looking to get rid of Miranda, and find someone younger to run Runway.
Andy saw looks of hatred the two people were giving each other, and she stayed completely still, hoping Jurassic Park was right, and they didn’t notice you if you didn’t move.
“Ouch,” Andy yelped as Miranda smacked her coat and purse into her arms.
“Come along, Emily. It’s time to gear up. Be sure you don’t embarrass me,” Miranda said, cutting her eyes at Andy. She walked over to the changing room, “Lock and load!”
Andy found herself running and dodging in the futuristic Lazer Park. She had never been good at it, so she mostly hid from the other shooters. Andy wasn’t even sure who was on her team, the red team, but she at least knew Miranda was on her team. Or at least that’s what she thought.
Andy saw a flash of silver hair, and then she was slammed back against a wall and she felt a female body press against her. She was looking into pale blue eyes that were twinkling. Miranda was in her element. She had already fired on Irv dozens of times, and when no one was looking, she had tripped the tiny man.
If Andy didn’t know better, she’d say her boss was looking at her like Emily had been looking at the BOOK earlier. Miranda pushed away from the wall and Andy abruptly and fired her weapon at Andy. “I’m on your team!” Andy exclaimed.
“All’s fair....” Miranda laughed as she ran off to find more prey.
Andy, still back to the wall, slowly slid down to the floor. She was starting to think working at Runway was way too much to handle. It was a very crazy world, and her boss, thought to be a Cougar, was in fact a Lezger!
FYI: http://lazerpark.com/page/nutu/Enter_the_Arena.html real Laser tag play in NY
Definition of Lezger:(Srs) http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=lezger FTW! I want my own Lezger!
I’m sure you’re all grateful to get a break from the chaos that is my mind, because next up for the RR is Melliemel or Ashes. They are going to mud wrestle to decide. Srs. Leave a comment to let whichever one writes next know what you’d like to see in the next riveting chappie of RR. Hope you had a happy bunny day!
Author: Elizabeth aka B.E.D.
Rated M for bad language and naughtiness.
Summary: Continuing on from Ashes stunning chapter full of WoW references and Andy tripping on skittles, what you need to know is that Andy has realized that she’s not in Kansas anymore, in fact she’s in a weird place with models eating fried eggplant, tentacles, and midgets and Nate kind of looks like Toto, doesn’t he?
Last A/N: I tried (I really did and it was hard!) to integrate all the things you bbs said you wanted to see in this chapter from Ashes’s previous chapter. You all are very sick, but I luvs you anyway.
Andy went home after the bizarre ad shoot. Nate wasn’t home yet, so even though she was still trippin from the skittles, she felt like she needed something to take the edge off, or at least bring her down. Just like in college, the answer was Tequila. Nate was a recovering alcoholic, so Andy couldn’t keep it around the apartment, or at least not in plain sight.
She went to the bathroom and pulled out an old shampoo bottle she kept hidden under the sink full of Tequila. After a few drinks, okay so she emptied the bottle, then she passed out on the bed in her clothes. Maybe tomorrow would be a better day.
The phone call she received at Six-thirty A.M. not only made Andy’s head hurt, but made her realize that it was most likely in fact not going to be a better day.
“Andrea?” Was Emily’s voice always so grating as well as British? “Where are you? Miranda wants Starbucks right away. Write this down: 6 no-foam skim lattes with extra shots, searing hot, and I mean hot! We also have another shoot today.” The red head promptly hung up.
Andy groaned, and rolled out of bed. She figured the people at Runway didn’t like the clothes she was wearing and would hate all her other clothes, so might as well wear what she had slept in. Maybe she’d start a new trend.
After standing in the long line and answering her phone every five minutes, “Yes Emily, I’m in line for the coffee.” “Yes Emily, I’m still in line.” “Emily, it’s Starbucks in New York! It’s going to be a while!”
Finally, Andy was walking in the lobby of Elias-Clarke, “I’m in the building Emily. Yes I have the Starbucks and it’s hot!”
So Andy was a little surprised as she walked up to the two desks to see Emily sipping out of a ‘I’d rather be reading Twilight’ mug. “Here’s your coffee.”
Emily rolled her eyes. “This is all for Miranda.” The red head took the 6 coffees into Miranda’s office.
Emily was particularly grumpy today, because she had woken up early and tried her new Titilating Tenticular Amazonatron Vibrator, and it had been so amazing, and she had just been right there.... and it exploded, which had been a nice feeling in itself, but now there was no boom boom. No great day in the morning! No more coming around the mountain....
But things were looking up for the red head as she brought over the BOOK. She showed it to Andy as she fondled it. “This is the BOOK. Now, it is a mock up of everything in the current issue,” Emily explained. As she continued to molest it, she moaned softly and her eyes rolled back in her head. She clenched her thighs together tightly and pressed on. “We deliver the BOOK to Miranda every night,” Emily began to rub the BOOK up against her chest as she spoke. Her cheeks were red and sweat was beginning to form on her forehead.
“As second assistant, you are suppose to wait for it, but until she decides you are not a complete psycho, I get the lovely task of waiting around for the BOOK,” Emily moaned in ecstasy.
As the red head started to walk away, the phone started ringing. Andy looked at Emily, unsure what to do. “Deal with it,” she said. “Don’t ever leave the desk for any reason. I suggest you invest in some Depends.” Emily continued down the hall, licking the BOOK’s spine.
A nervous Andy answered the phone, “Um hello this is an office... I mean Mrs. Priestly’s office.... yes it’s Miranda’s office. She’s in a meeting, can I take a message.... Yes, okay. Can you spell Calvin Klein? Oh, I guess not,” Andy said softly as she hung up the phone.
At that point Miranda came storming out of her office, pumped up on Starbucks. “Emily, it’s time to go.” (Miranda was doing that weird thing where she called the second assistant by the same name as the first. Most thought it a tactic to make new employees feel vulnerable, but really all the caffeine had begun to rot her brain and it was really hard to remember names.)
Andy prepared herself for another chaotic photo shoot, but was surprised to not see stick thin models, midgets or anything that had been present the day before. There were normal sized people dressed in cartoon character costumes. Andy watched amused as the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles passed her. She thought she caught a glimpse of He-man and She-ra over in the corner making out, which was kind of gross, since in the cartoon they were twins.
Andy turned to Miranda, and for the first time, her employer looked nervous. Before Andy could ask if she was okay, Miranda snapped at her, “Find the photographer.”
Just then a group of young people and a man dressed in a blueish suit with green hair walked up to them. “By your powers combined, I am Captain Planet!”
Andy laughed, it was Captain Planet and the Planeteers! Andy stopped laughing when Miranda gripped her arm. “Uh, Miranda... I think the photographer is over there.” She wanted to also let her employer know that she was cutting her circulation off, but Miranda looked terrified. They walked over together to the young man not dressed in a costume and fiddling with camera equipment.
They heard Captain Planet say, “Come on, let’s blow this Stalagmite stand.”
Andy wasn’t surprised that all the ‘characters’ were nerds. She was surprised that the young man leered at Miranda as they walked up to him. Miranda, still looked terrified and didn’t notice. “The client wants character from retro cartoons,” the photographer explained.
“I could go home and get my orange sweater,” Andy offered. Miranda stopped looking scared and glared at her new assistant. Andy pointed over to another corner where there were two people in Shaggy and Scooby costumes. “I could be Velma,” she tried to explain.
Miranda still looked blank.
“You know, ‘Scooby Doo, where are you?’” Andy smiled brightly.
Miranda made a decision and turned to the photographer. “I’m going to go outside and make some phone calls, Emily will stay here as she is an expert at this idiocy.” The Editor then ran out of the shoot location as quick as she could, which was amazing to do in high heels.
The sleazy photographer watched as she left. “That is one hot Cougar!”
Gross. Andy rolled her eyes. “She’s not a Cougar, she’s married.”
“That ain’t what I heard. She’s in her second marriage, and it’s on the rocks.” The photographer laughed. “Hey remember that time Shaggy and Scooby tried to eat that guy in the hotdog suit?”
Hotdogs were gross too, for many reasons.
An hour later, responding to a frantic phone call from Miranda, Andy exited the shoot location. Surprised again, she saw Miranda fending off a hug from Buzz Lightyear.
Rebuffed, the man in the costume said, “You are a sad, strange little woman, and you have my pity.” He stomped up the stairs in his boots.
As Miranda was hyperventilating, Andy helped her sit down on a street bench. “Here,” Andy suggested. “Put your head between your knees and just breathe.” It seemed even the Dragon Lady had her own kryptonite. Who would have ever thought it would be people dressed up as cartoon characters?
“Call....” Miranda took a few more deep breaths. “Call the car, it’s time to go to Lazer Park.”
Andy was already dialing the number for Miranda’s driver, but she was sure she had heard wrong. Andy flipped through the day planner Emily had prepared for her, and sure enough, there in cursive was listed Elias-Clarke Corporate Team Building exercise at Lazer Park. They were going to play Laser Tag!
In the car on the way to the Lazer Arena, Andy called Emily. She got the red head’s voice mail. After her post coital encounter with the BOOK, Emily had eaten a triple cheeseburger and a dozen crispy creme donuts, using the BOOK as a plate to lick it off. She was in a sugary orgasmic haze and wouldn’t wake up until much later when it was time to go find that bitch she had to kill, Andren on WoW.
They arrived at Lazer Park, Andy trying frantically to keep up with Miranda into the building. As soon as they entered the main room, the air grew cold. Irv Ravitz was gearing up and entire group of employees knew Miranda had a score to settle. The rumor mill around the water cooler said that old Irv was looking to get rid of Miranda, and find someone younger to run Runway.
Andy saw looks of hatred the two people were giving each other, and she stayed completely still, hoping Jurassic Park was right, and they didn’t notice you if you didn’t move.
“Ouch,” Andy yelped as Miranda smacked her coat and purse into her arms.
“Come along, Emily. It’s time to gear up. Be sure you don’t embarrass me,” Miranda said, cutting her eyes at Andy. She walked over to the changing room, “Lock and load!”
Andy found herself running and dodging in the futuristic Lazer Park. She had never been good at it, so she mostly hid from the other shooters. Andy wasn’t even sure who was on her team, the red team, but she at least knew Miranda was on her team. Or at least that’s what she thought.
Andy saw a flash of silver hair, and then she was slammed back against a wall and she felt a female body press against her. She was looking into pale blue eyes that were twinkling. Miranda was in her element. She had already fired on Irv dozens of times, and when no one was looking, she had tripped the tiny man.
If Andy didn’t know better, she’d say her boss was looking at her like Emily had been looking at the BOOK earlier. Miranda pushed away from the wall and Andy abruptly and fired her weapon at Andy. “I’m on your team!” Andy exclaimed.
“All’s fair....” Miranda laughed as she ran off to find more prey.
Andy, still back to the wall, slowly slid down to the floor. She was starting to think working at Runway was way too much to handle. It was a very crazy world, and her boss, thought to be a Cougar, was in fact a Lezger!
FYI: http://lazerpark.com/page/nutu/Enter_the_Arena.html real Laser tag play in NY
Definition of Lezger:(Srs) http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=lezger FTW! I want my own Lezger!
I’m sure you’re all grateful to get a break from the chaos that is my mind, because next up for the RR is Melliemel or Ashes. They are going to mud wrestle to decide. Srs. Leave a comment to let whichever one writes next know what you’d like to see in the next riveting chappie of RR. Hope you had a happy bunny day!